Cloudy
by Mileycfan4eva
Summary: Dedicated to Damian Hurley. Being a teen is hard enough without the added pressures of royalty, fame. Follow Eleanor, Liam, Gemma, Damian's journey's. Their trying to figure out who they are how they fit into society. Trying to stay strong through the bullying, hate, lies and deception. Their days seem cloudy, grey but will it get better?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: The Royals are owned by Loinsgate and by E network sadly not by me. No copyright intended. Inspired to write this story by the sheer love of Elizabeth Hurley's adorable son Damian. I know he would love to be apart of the show and since the writers haven't done it yet, I will. Keeping in mind that I do not know Damian personally so anything in this story is simply fictitious. His last name will be changed.**

 **Backround: This takes place just before the twins will be turning 14.**

 **Lyrics Belong To Todrick Hall It Gets Better**

 **Damian's p o v**

Vortex a region in which the flow rotates around the axis-line. Yup that would describe how my stomach was operating at the present moment. If the butterflies were the axis than the vomit that was building up was the vortex. Trying everything I could think of to loosen these nerves I went from jumping up and down excising my neck, arms, legs. Warming up my voice, stretching, listening to music. Nothing worked I didn't understand it either why was I so frigging nervous? This wasn't my first time preforming live.

I've been doing this for years I grew up in this church, yet here I was shaking like a newborn baby kitten sweating like a bull in the summer heat. Feeling nauseated like a kid who spent too much time spinning on a merry go round. " _Relax D-Man you got this mate"_ Turning to face my best friend since forever I let out a deep shaky breath seeing Lavinia Bryant smiling at me. How was she so calm? She hasn't even been preforming as long as I have, she just started a little less than a year ago. Yet she was posing for selfies checking her cute self out in her cell phone screen as she smiled pouted her lips and did all those girlie things girls do. Fluffing her bangs of long red hair which today was braided and rolled up into a French bun. Her checks were a rosy pink in color her beautiful eyes light green. While I probably looked pale and sickly all from nerves. I could just see the caption now as she pulled me to her with her arm wrapped around my shoulders snapping another selfie.

She looked flawless from her navy blue skirt to her white blouse and blue blazer not that I was checking her out cause I wasn't she's been my best friend since I was three. Still I am a thirteen year old boy and I notice pretty girls. It was ironic though that the one with the less experience here was calm and collected and the one with years of it was now pacing the room. Trying not to look outside the curtain to the 2,000 plus people filling up our church's pews.

Deep breath Damian take a deep breath. So many people from older generational members like Mr. Scott Johnson and his wife Lucy they never had kids but they were so devoted to the church that they considered every kid that passed through these walls to be one of theirs, In truth it was pretty amazing. I mean just looking around I could see the different generations all inspired in one way or another by them. Mrs. Kelly who is forty-nine now she was in and out of Juvie as a kid she came from a broken home and was on her way to jail for a long time before Mrs. Scott stepped in and took an interests in her.

Buying her new clothes helping her to study she was the one who discovered the dyslexia she helped her to learn how to deal with the disability she had the patience love and dedication that no one else had for her. Because of her Mrs. Kelly went to college and got her bachelors degree in teaching she learned how to play the piano and is now our leading organist. She got married three years ago to a nice fellow who owns a hardware store now they have two sons Jamie who's a year and Jake who's five months.

There's JT Jameson who's thirty his family had little money growing up his dad was in the service he was often picked on and wasn't able to defend himself. Mr. Scott would pick him up on Saturdays and take him to boxing he taught him discipline and strength which helped him improve his inner strength. He didn't use it to fight but he used it to build himself up his new confidence let him explore his other interests like running and English. He went on to earn top grades in college and is now a journalist in Israel, he volunteers at a school over there to help kids with their physical fitness program.

Mrs. Katz who's forty-three she learned to love God because of them she found the strength to get free of an abusive relationship and found love with a decent hardworking man who devoted his life to loving her right, now they have three kids Sam 19, Julia 14, Aidan 11 and a granddaughter Ava their raising them through the church. Old members mixed with new members and even a few non-members, I recognized some kids from my old school like Brett who was one of the stars of the football team. I can't say I ever got on well with him I mean were not enemies but I don't consider him a mate either. Jane who's one of the popular kids and made my life a bloody nightmare for the last three years always calling me an anorak. She was with three of her friends Sally, Marge and Carly I kind of liked Carly she was pretty and treated everyone decent.

Dear god if I screwed up everyone would know within hours. Don't screw up Damian. Keep yourself calm. Who cares what they say you know you got something special it's why you've worked your butt off for the last thirteen years. Jane's just whacked she doesn't know you or your talent. Lavinia elbowed me as the rest of the choir lined up.

Our Choir teacher Mrs. Park lined us up taking a head count my eyes traveled to her she's beautiful long black hair blue eyes 5'8 probably no more than 100 lbs. Chill man this isn't about girls although their a nice distraction from these nerves. "Jeez _"Lavinia what the bloody hell?"_ Stumbling I caught myself on Emmie Moseley's sleeve causing her to yelp as I tried not to fall when Lavinia jumped on my back. Her grin caused me to laugh letting go of my anger, even as a few kids snickered. " _Well I got those nerves to loosen up" "Not funny mate not funny" "Yeah it kind of is relax mate_ _D'_ _you can do this_ _Damian, I don't think your even nervous about this I think your scared about tomorrow" "Quite Lavinia, Damian line up"_ I wasn't even talking this time!

Pastor Werner ended his sermon making me hustle to get up and line up with everyone as we filed out to fill up the stands on top of the stage. The music started my eyes adjusted to the bright lights as I took a few deep breaths wow there were a ton of people here.

What did she mean I was nervous about tomorrow? Why should I be nervous? I mean I was only starting one of the most prestigious preforming arts school in all of England. No reason to be nervous. Looking around I tried to find my spot to focus on I found it always helped me to have something to stare at and not the eyes glued to me the mouths whispering about me. My mum surprise wasn't there probably to busy working to say her lack of support hurt would be an understatement but I could do this I was doing this for her so she could have an easier life. Once I had my training once I had my chance. I could make enough money so she could retire and be comfortable but to get there I had to work and that meant preforming with everything I had to prove I deserved my place at Herefordshire International School For the Preforming Arts.

Deep breath I stepped forward as my solo came up the minute I opened my mouth everything stopped the doubts, fears, nervous tension, worry, anxiety it all melted away as soon as I focused on the lyrics and the music.

 _ **Maybe today seems cloudy and Grey,  
So full of sorrow and tomorrow seems so far away  
But it gets better, it gets better, yeah  
I know the world keeps throwing you strife,  
But keep on strutting down this yellow brick road  
called life  
Cause it gets better, it gets better, yeah**_

 _ **Hey you wondering who you are, saying  
There's something wrong here, I don't belong here  
Hey you don't you know you've come so far  
When there's no one to run to  
I'll always love you**_

They were right today may seem kind of messed up but tomorrow is a new day and it's not that far away I just have to hold on and know I can do this.

 **Re-uploading because I received a review it was too hard to read. So I hope this helps while I appreciate reviews. I also appreciate people doing so in a kind way not in an attempt to tear the writer down, this is after all suppose to be for fun not trying to win a noble price.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Damian p o v**

" _Great job Damian see I always told you that you could do it"_

I felt myself blushing as Lavinia punched my arm while we walked from our church to the football field for my match against Manchester.

" _Aw thanks but I hope I have what it takes to make it in my new school."_

" _I mean the best of the best go there it's so hard to even get in"_

" _Yea but you did make it"_

" _You know I hate when you talk rubbish_ _Damian_ _your frigging awesome."_

" _Y_ _ou have a gift man not everyone has that talent or the drive that you have when someone has that gift you have to take it." "_ _U_ _se it to get what you want you've always been unique ever since we were kids." "I mean when I was happy playing with babies, the boys would be playing baseball you were inside working on your drumming, piano or learning some ridiculously hard dance move practicing lyrics for an up coming show or editing a video different doesn't have to mean something bad it's a part of you man music is like your oxygen so use that and breathe some new life into this world"_

I could barely respond to that I mean how can you? It's not a typical conversation between two thirteen year olds. So I did what most blokes my age would do I kicked a few stones blushed looked away and mumbled thanks, and a few incoherent responses. Lavinia grabbed my arm as I came up from tying my cleats

" _Damian man for real believe in yourself the way I do only you can achieve your dreams not me"_

Jumping up and down as I stretched she sighed throwing her hands up it's not that I wasn't listening but I had to warm up. I was still so tense from my nerves I didn't want to get injured on the field.

" _Uh boys they can never have a serious conversation"_

She stomped away great I blew that one. " _Damian get over here now! Your late lad warm up or your benched!_ _"_ _Game starts in five minutes! I've warned you before about being on time"_

Coach Blake yelled at me glancing back at Lavinia who was now in the stands with her friends I could see her hands going wild as she talked to them. Not a good sign. Jogging over to my team mates I started stretching " _Yo Grant I heard the news great job at getting into that school"_ Paul Rowan slapped me on my back as I bent over to stretch

" _How ya feeling mate?" "A bit nervous but alright I suppose" "_ _Man your braver than me if I was going to the same school as the Royal twins I would be shitting myself" "Huh?'' "Aw man ya didn't hear Prince Liam and Princess Eleanor just got accepted to the school" "Well at least you'll have one mate there"_

I looked up as I heard the girls start to scream sure enough there he was Prince Liam Henstridge getting out of the black SUV looking calm and collective sunglasses over his eyes a bag thrown casually over his right shoulder. Liam loved every bit of the attention, I swear one girl fainted he seemed to eat it all up.

No Paul was wrong Liam and I may be on the same team but we'd never be mates we came from two different worlds.

"G _ood afternoon Liam" "Afternoon coach sorry I'm late I was at a charity event" "No worries mate just get ready your golden"_

Yup two different worlds entirely. We jogged out to the field as the other team came out as well soon enough the mums started yelling you could practically tell who's mum was who by their chants.

" _Let's go Logan!"_

" _Grant is Great!"_

" _Taren_ _is terrific"_

" _Jordan kick some butt"_

" _Paul eyes on the ball"_

All the guys snickered as Liam patted his back laughing.

" _Something you want to tell us there mate?_ " _"I don't know man your mum seems to think you like those balls"_

" _Shut your mouth man before I pound you"_

" _Sorry I don't play that way"_

We all snickered louder pounding each others back as Paul got madder. But before he could attack Riley Liam stepped between them

" _Enough guys were here as team we play as a team we stick together as a team the only pounding any of us will be doing would be our feet against that ball against the other team were one team who's with me?"_

 **Special Thanks to everyone who read and reviewed.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Damian**

Second half and we were down but we weren't quiting Liam was leading us all there wasn't one player that was slacking who wasn't sweating panting or feeling the burn in their legs. The weather wasn't really helping when we started it was scolding hot now the sun had vanished and there was a scolding pouring rain making visibility scares.

" _I'm open Shamus!" "Pass the ball Shamus!"_

Shamus O' Reilly slammed the side of his right foot into the ball sending it high into the mid field. I raced to get there but one of their mid-feilders chest slammed it. Damn it he sent it flying my way stepping back I tried to get a position on where it was don't panic Damian you got this. Following it with my eyes I turned and ran after it as the ball descended I leaped after it swinging my foot slamming it into the ball so hard it sailed through the air and slide right towards our goal.

My face fell as I saw two of my teammates scamper after it panicking breathless already I ran after them Liam, Paul and Shamus all fought to get a hold of the ball against two members from Manchester those boys maybe our age but dang they were taller and stockier. They had at least four inches on us and a good 50 pounds. Why didn't I pay attention dang it! Stupid stop daydreaming focus!

" _Nice work Grant"_

Shamus shoved me as he grunted running towards Manchester who had control of the ball now. I wanted to pound him who the heck was he to lay his hands on me? Keep your cool Damian don't lower yourself to his level fight for the ball that's what matters now. Liam kicked the ball so hard he knocked two of our lads down and one of theirs. How much anger did he have in him? What the heck could he be mad at? He's a frigging prince he has an amazing life.

My legs fought against any more running but I pushed past the pain years of dance have taught me to use the pain as a motivation for gaining if you keep fighting you eventually nail whatever move you've been struggling to master.

" _Move it Grant we don't need no scalawags to muck this up let the big boys handle it"_

Lucas Kenton snarled at me my chest felt tight from anger. " _Screw you Kenton"_ I spotted the ball a few yards ahead watching for my opponents who were guarding me. I dodged in between them and took off being small could sometimes be an advantage. Within seconds I was on the heals of two Manchester lads and had sneaked my foot in between one of their legs nailing the ball towards their goal. Five seconds later I was body checked into the cold hard ground. Groaning I shock my head as I pushed myself up feeling a hand help me along the way finding myself staring into Liam's grinning face.

" _Killer kick Grant you just helped us tie" "Yeah mate great kick now quit lying about we have a game to win"_ Lucky Patterson slapped my back as I shock out the pain.

There's nothing like the split second rush of a ball rushing 80 m.p.h at your face to make you appreciate life. The screams of the fans gave me new life my foot connected with the ball sending it straight towards the goal. Liam leaped up and slammed his head into the ball sending it high over Manchester's heads the ball sailed through the air and past their goalie's hands. The screams from our side over sounded the blast of the buzzer signaling the games end and our victory.

Within seconds we were surrounded by our team mates coaches and parents all hugging lifting Liam up. Grinning from ear to ear I lined up with my teammates to slap hands with their other team.

After our coach gave us the usual talk I changed shoes hurrying to catch up with Lavinia who was snapping pictures of me. Great they would be all over IG, Facebook and twitter within seconds. I better look half decent. So maybe I didn't have a mum or a dad there but I did have a pretty amazing cheerleader. Tackling her with a hug we both fell to the ground laughing yup she took that moment to snap another selfie. Calming down we headed off the field watching as the teams scattered going off with families. Except Liam who left with two of his bodyguards. I wouldn't mind his life he had so much freedom to go where ever he wanted whenever he wanted.

" _Soon you'll be able to call Liam a mate"_

" _No Lavinia he's a cool guy but were from two different worlds we may be team mates and school mates but will never be just simply mates"_

" _Besides I already have the best mate I could ask for"_

Slinging my arm over her shoulders I pulled her towards me as she giggled tickling my sides which caused me to squeal out.

" _Promise me you won't forget me when you go off to your fancy school Damian?"_

" _Who could forget you Lavinia your pretty unforgettable"_

" _No kidding you better just remember that Damian Charles Samuel Grant"_

" _Whew full name pretty heavy Lavinia think you can handle all this?"_

" _Oh don't go getting a big ego there Damian"_

" _W_ _hat'cha'ya gonna do if I do?"_

" _You don't want to find out mister"_

I arched an eyebrow and she took off after me both of us laughing as our feet pounded the stone gravel. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Damian**

" _Damian grab the register card from Arran love ring up these folks who have been patiently waiting"_

We were barely through the doors of my mum's restaurant Bellissimo Pizzeria when she yelled to me over the rowdy costumers. Seconds later she was yelling orders at some of her other employees. It's the last thing I wanted to do after spending two hours running a field but there was no point in arguing.

I bet Prince Liam didn't have to slave like this. Lavinia shock her head as she went to find a table for us. Sighing I scanned the crowd for my cousin Arran shouldn't be too hard to find him he just dyed his hair neon pink and shaved the sides. Yet I could barely see above the heads of people drinking and shouting as they watched a rugby match on TV. Finally I spotted him grabbed the key and hurried to the register.

" _Good afternoon Mrs. Packard how are you?"_

" _I'm doing well thank you how are you?"_

" _Same ma'am busy but well"_

" _Good to hear young man I hear you got into the school you've been dreaming of" "Thank you ma'am it feels great but the real work is yet to start wish me luck that will be_ _30.9_ _5_ _"_

Customer after customer I raced between the register and the soda machine to fill up drinks almost twenty minutes passed before I could head over to Lavinia who had already ordered for us.

" _Yo Damian my boy what's good mate?"_

I raced over excited to see our friend Romar J'aversion who had been vacating in the states.

" _How was the states Brah?"_

" _Excellent man excellent we saw the Empire state building, Elsie island, Grand Canyon, Las Vegas, Disney World, man this world is so huge it really opened my eyes Brah, I need to settle down focus on school cause there's so much out there to explore if we don't take our education seriously we ain't never gonna get out of this small town"_

" _What's wrong with this town man?"_

" _The Parliament is cray over here man they don't give a damn about us little folks all they care about is their own arse"_ _l_ _ook around D were barely living above poverty most of us can barely afford food, a roof over our heads our parents bust their arses everyday only to have Parliament take what little we have" "Don't get me started on our queen and king they sit on their spoiled arse and watch us die slowly each day they don't give a rat's bum about us" "_ _We gotta help ourselves pay attention in school get amazing grades find a proper job make that dough"_

" _Well said Romar maybe you can talk some sense into your foolish mate here"_

Mum glared at me as she patted Romar's shoulder.

" _Aw Mum don't start with me"_

" _Start with you child I never finished you just refuse to hear me you got big dreams child but your foolish if you think you can achieve them you think I enjoy what I do getting my arse up at four am every morning to slave over a hot stove, prep all this food clean the equipment, do inventory, than wait on people for 12 hours everyday only to stay up late closing never mind all the things I do for your ungrateful behind"_

" _You think a 13 year old would be able to see clearly and appreciate all the sacrifices I make be a man get an education and find a decent job so maybe one day he could pay back his mama, No your too busy being blinded by city lights your name on a marquee"_

" _Their not foolish dreams Mum I have real talent"_

" _Yea and you think every other struggling artist didn't think they had real talent?" "You know what their all doing now?" "Look on every corner in every big city their sleeping in tents, garbage bags their the queens alright"_

" _So what mum so it wasn't their fate it doesn't mean I won't make it every dream starts with someone brave enough to dream and every success starts with someone willing to go beyond the dream someone not afraid to work their bum off" "I don't care if I go without food, I'll wear the same dang clothes day after day I just want to preform and no one is going to stop me"_

" _Maybe if you spent a little more time believing in me instead of judging and condemning me maybe you would see I have actual talent" "Don't go fooling yourself either mum we all know you never spent a pound to help me get anywhere" "I did it all Mum I spent the hours studying, practicing, learning I got thee bloody scholarship not you so don't go taking credit for nothing"_

I spun out the back doors of the restaurant and ran up the steps connecting to our flat. Slamming my bedroom door I let out a scream as I tore off my jersey and dirty shorts going into my shower thank god I had a bathroom that connected to my room I wouldn't have to see her all evening. Who was she to tell me I would never make it? To deem my dreams foolish and unrealistic?She never even came to see me preform not once. It's sad really why have me if she didn't even want anything to do with me?

Maybe if I had a dad things wouldn't be so bad between us. Nothing was calming me down and dwelling on these thoughts weren't helping. Only one thing would so I picked up my sticks sat at my drums and started to warm up. I'm an over thinker I analyze to much I worry which leads me to panic to fear which ends up making me sick. When I play the drums though everything becomes back-round noise. I started with some simple beats than I loosened up and started playing some more complicated rhythms.

It takes a lot of concentration to keep it all flowing smoothly both feet and both arms have to be in sync. Finally I started a song by Avenged Sevenfold feeling loser I really let it go the whole street was probably hearing me now good for them they should all get to know me because one day I'm going to be famous and these bleeding tossers would be wishing they supported me back when.

My heart started to calm down my tension loosened and my smile was back. I pictured myself on the stage at the Royal Albert hall selling out arenas. Maybe I would be in a band, maybe I would be solo either way I would rock. My voice filled the room as I started singing. I could hear the critics reviewing me in my head "Man look at Grant going his arms are like lighting" "His voice is on fleek"

 _ **In a way it seems  
There's no one to call  
When our thoughts are so numb  
And our feelings unsure**_

 _ **We all have emptiness inside  
We all have answers to find  
But you can't win this fight**_

When I realized how late it had become I moved to my bed feeling tired all of a sudden. I was calmer now but there was an emptiness inside. I was starting to understand that all these years of hoping that one day mum would come around were just years wasted in vain for whatever reason she had a deep dis-plain for artists. Flipping through the channels on telly I came across a news report on the royal family at some charity function.

Princess Eleanor looked adorable in a light blue jumper her light brown hair flowing to her shoulders spinning across her cute dimples. Her gloves matched her dress I bet they cost more than my whole closet full of clothes. Prince Liam looked dashing in his suit what was it Alexander Mcqueen? I had no idea I was rubbish when it came to fashion. I just noticed how the queen looked radiant she was pretty smoking for someone in her late forties, her arms around her daughter laughing when a reporter asked her for a comment she talked about her beautiful Eleanor was and how much she loved her and believed in her.

I bet they gave everything to those kids, Robert was so handsome and tall his suit looked like a Ermenegildo Zegna Bespoke okay maybe I knew a little about fashion. Yeah I bet they wanted for nothing no reason for them to feel empty. Turning off the lights I closed my eyes as the doubts crept in once again. No music to block them now.

Could I really make it?

Did I have what it takes?

Would I be accepted?

What was my destiny?

Where would I go if I didn't make it?

Why wasn't my dad around? Why was mum so cold?

Why were some of us born into poverty but had so many dreams and apparitions and some of us born into money and had no ambition dreams or drive?

 **Music: Welcome to the family by Avenged Sevenfold no copyright intended.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Eleanor**

" _Eleanor, Liam may I have your attention"_

Mum clicked her glass as we sat at the state dining room attempting to eat breakfast. At least I was attempting to eat but I couldn't even touch my cereal. Liam and Robert seemed to have no issue they were tearing through a stack of pancakes. My nerves were on full alert making my stomach feel like a roller-coaster.

" _As we all know the twins are about to turn fourteen"_

I watched my dumb as dirt cousins looking confused as they turned to my uncle Cyrus

" _But daddy you told us we were fourteen last year, Was it a leap year?"_

Penelope looked towards Cyrus who grunted as he swallowed some kind of pill for a man of only thirty three he sure seemed to need a lot of pills. He didn't answer his daughter who than turned to her sister Maribel who asked.

" _What's a leap year?"_

" _Duh Maribel it means the year fast forwards and we skip all 12 months"_

Oh god really? How was I even related to these two?

" _Uh no dumb bunnies it means that the year will have 366 days as opposed to a normal year which has 365 a leap year only occurs every four years so therefore since you were born in a leap year your birthday should actually only be every four years"_

" _What daddy no way!"_

" _They can't do that were princess_ _es_ _we can't have a birthday every four years how are those commoners going to know to shower us with gifts and riches!"_

" _Oh for the love of god shut-up both of you haven't we always had a birthday for you every year?"_

" _I'm confused"_

" _No Penelope your just dumb"_

" _Daddy are you going to let her talk to us that way?"_

" _ENOUGH already I'm talking now and I am the god damn queen in this house and in this country so the lot of you need to shut it"_

All of us sat up at attention quickly quieting down as my mum stood up pissed off.

" _As I was saying Eleanor and Liam will be fourteen on Thursday so of course this calls for a grand celebration on Saturday we will be having our annual parade"_

Sovereigns always have two birthdays our actual day of birth which for Liam and I is August 28th which we celebrate privatively with just our families, friends but officially we have another birthday a day for the public to celebrate this day is always held in summer so the weather is almost certain to be perfect. Mum picked August 30th this year a day which normally brings her great sadness since her sister was killed on this day a year before we were born when paparazzi were chasing her car and her driver lost control crashing over the median slamming into the wall.

She was pinned under the car for hours while those heartless pricks took pictures spun lies in the media about how the accident happened. My aunt passed away before help could get her out. My mum was very close to her younger sister she was her protector more like a mum than a sister, sometimes I imagine what she must have been like. I get sad knowing that I'll never get to meet someone who held such importance to my mum so much so she named her only daughter after both her and her sister, Elberta Rose she was only 22 when she passed away.

" _Eleanor are you listening?"_

" _Of course not Helena the little draft always has her head in the clouds"_

" _Shut-up_ _Uncle_ _Cyrus I am listening"_

" _Yes mum I'm sorry what were you saying?"_

" _I was saying that since you two are turning into young men and ladies it's time that you shall began to court I have arranged for a date for each of you"_

Liam and I both slammed down our fists as we shouted out _"WHAT! No way!"_ Cyrus and Robert seemed to think this was hysterical both cracking up. 

" _Liam you will be escorting Gemma Kensington"_

" _Oh just grand mum the little demon won't leave me alone as it is now your encouraging her!"_

" _Liam stop sulking Gemma is a beautiful well bread young lady who comes form acceptable social standard you could be so lucky as to end up as her husband"_

" _Eleanor you will be escorted by the Prince of Turkey Kaapo"_

" _NO Mum he smells and his hands always wander"_

" _Eleanor stop whining it's not lady like and he is a perfectly well mannered young man it wouldn't hurt you to allow a boy a feel or two"_

" _Helena are you serious! She's barely 14 if my daughter doesn't want to date or have a boy feeling her body up that's perfectly sensible to me"_

" _Oh what do you know Simon your only her father"_

" _Exactly and as her father I do not want some over zealous man who's four years older than our daughter putting his grimy hands on my sweet baby"_

" _She's almost 14 Simon she hasn't had a date yet she needs to start exploring her options"_

" _No mum I don't I'm fine not dating I like being single"_

" _Listen to our daughter Helena she's trying to tell you she's not ready to date"_

" _Your so difficult Eleanor and Simon stop encouraging her it's not normal to be 14 and not at least looking at boys"_

If I wasn't already pissed off those two dumb as dirt pebbles started chanting _"Eleanor's a freak Eleanor's a freak!_

" _I'm going to kill you!"_

" _Eleanor sit down and eat you two walk away"_

She waved her hands at the two red head booze's to scares. They ran like two scared jack rabbits.

" _Robert be a dear and help your brother to get ready" "Yes Mum" "Eleanor eat your cereal we only have twenty minutes before you two need to leave and your not washed up or dressed"_

Sighing I yanked a brush through my hair who the hell did she think she was? Telling me I had to date someone who I was going to date what kind of mum pimps her own daughter out? Didn't she get it I wasn't into dating.

Pain tore through my head as my brush got caught in my tangles ripping some of my hair out as I yanked and yanked. Tears burned my eyelids sliding out frustrated I threw the brush which clanged against my desk.

" _Eleanor for god sakes what is all this screaming and moaning about?"_

Mum and her assistants Rachel and Lucias came inside my room.

" _Seriously tears Eleanor your way too old to cry Rachel, Lucias please give us some alone time"_

" _Of course your majesty"_

They both curtsied to their queen my mum before glaring at me and walking out I know Rachel sneered. Mum paid her no mind moving swiftly across the room picking up my brush motioning for me to sit on the edge of my bed. Stomping over crossing my arms still mad at her I glared but did as she told me.

" _Sweetheart talk to me there's more to this hissyfit than a few tangles or being setup on a date"_

" _N_ _o there isn't mum I just really hate when you interfere with my personal life"_

My answer apparently gave her great entertainment cause she started laughing. Her touch relaxed me though her smooth hands which smelled like coconut and butter-cream were soft against the back of my neck. I felt my once tangled hair start to become fluffy and light.

" _Eleanor it is simply a date for the evening_ _not a life long commitment and I hate to break it to you my love but you are a thirteen year old girl you have no personal life your my child so your life is my business"_

I started chocking as she sprayed my hair.

" _If it's that horrible you never have to see him again"_

She slapped my bum as she finished my hair " _Time to dress my love"_

She handed me my uniform as she shock her head.


	6. Chapter 6

**Helena**

Teenagers everyone warned me that my cute adorable helpful loving little creatures would someday turn on me. That they would become horrible angst filled venomous spewing monsters. I never understood what they meant growing up I was never a wild child, I lived on a farm in Herefordshire where I learned early on the value of hard work.

As a child we had little money so we could not hire help which left the farm work to me and my sister who was seven years younger than me. Every morning I got up at five am to milk and feed the cows, brush and feed the horses clean the stalls, round up the chickens and roasters. Collect the eggs than make breakfast for my whole family before getting a shower and walking my sister and I to school six miles away.

There was no time even as a teenager to act out even though we had some better luck when I was older and were able to hire a young man to help out. Alistair was a sweet charming young man who I fell in love with but even than I still had commitment to my family. I did what I was told to when I was told to do it even if I hated it I respected my parents. So I never expected my kids to be any less even with all the warnings I braced myself but I figured they were all jealous of how perfect my family is.

Robbie turned 13 and I figured it would start than but he never changed he was always sweet helping charming and did whatever was asked of him. He was a dream child really I know a mum is never suppose to chose favorites but how could I not love him more than anyone else? He never gave attitude he respected us and took pride in his tittle. Liam idolizes Robert and has done almost everything Robbie ever did so it was no surprise he followed suit he has his moments but really he never moves past a little bratty.

Eleanor is a different story their twins but she might as well be adopted when she was a little girl she was my little angel I could dress her as I wanted do her hair without her crying screaming or wiggling away. We use to go for mani/pedi's all the time she followed me everywhere. We would snuggle and watch movies giggle over magazines over who was the worst dressed who was the cutest. Now she's developing hormones and I feel that everyone's warnings are about to come true.

I couldn't understand why she was throwing such a fit over this one date.

" _Eleanor hurry up for god sakes, you have at least a forty minute drive_ _you don't want to be late on the first day"_

" _I want privacy mum!"_

" _We all want something baby girl I want you to hurry up but it doesn't mean we all get what we want in this life"_

Her scream only made me laugh harder her little checks were so pink they could lite up a pitch black room her eyes filled with tears making her face glisten as they fell to her checks.

" _Right now little girl that means I am the adult and you will do as I say when I say"_

She had no time to brace herself as I pulled her to me and grabbed her nightgown yanking it over her head she tried fighting me but I am stronger and more experienced.

Pissed off now she yanked on her skirt and blazer pushing me off.

" _Can I at least wear makeup?"_

" _No not till your at least 15"_

" _Not fair!" All the girls will be wearing makeup!"_

" _H_ _ow do you know that Eleanor you've never been to this school before"_

" _I just know Mum I'll be the freak there"_

Rolling my eyes as I went over to where she was in front of the mirror I helped her with her shirt. " _Eleanor your not going to be a freak so stop this whatever it is your doing"_

Handing her the shoes which she yanked out of my hands glaring I just shock my head sighing my mum would love to see this. _"Eleanor lets go before your late we have to clean up your face brush your teeth"_ She stood motionless staring in the mirror.

" _Eleanor what's wrong?"_

" _Mum?"_

Her voice was soft now wavering in speak dear lord it was only 5:30 am give me strength.

" _Do you think I have what it takes to make it?"_

I was ready to laugh when I saw how scared she looked her eyes filled with tears self doubt and genuine fear. Quickly I went over wrapping my arms over her shoulders turning her to face the mirror.

" _Do I think my beautiful daughter thee princess of England has what it takes to make it at one of the biggest preforming arts school in the country?"_ She simply nodded leaning back into me I could smell her sweet jasmine as I leaned down kissing her head.

" _Sweetheart what really matters is what you think people will always judge you but if you have the swagger the confidence to hold your ground prove to them that all the hours you've sent practicing learning than whatever someone else thinks will be irreverent" "Your more than a pretty face Eleanor show them you believe in yourself that's the first step to making it once you have that you'll be just fine" "Now let's go my love"_

" _Mum?"_

" _Yes babe?"_

" _Thanks but I still don't want to date that smelly creep"_

" _Well unless you can find your own date that would be acceptable to my standards Eleanor you have no choice in the matter_ _now g_ _o brush your teeth, get to school have a great day darling"_

" _Doubtful you already ruined my day FML!"_

What does FML mean? I hate the slang teenagers use what the heck did she just say to me? 


	7. Chapter 7

**Eleanor's p o v**

 **A/N Thanks to anyone who favored or reviewed a special thanks to Lavina. I promise I will try to add more of this awesome character.**

" _Aren't you even slightly annoyed with mum Liam?"_

" _Sure I am Len but what can we do about it? Mum is the way she is it's always been like this since we were born were royalty our lives are not our own, besides it's one maybe two nights today is only Monday. I'll worry about Gemma Thursday today however is about us Len about us achieving what we always dreamed about were one step closer now"_

" _Yea I get that but it's not right Liam it's my life my body not hers!"_

Robert was staring at us the whole time quietly as we argued over this not saying a word but now he cleared his throat.

" _Leni it's not wise to challenge Mum she is the queen she always gets what she wants" "Well not this time Robert she won't control my damn life"_

" _Len you know I have always admired your attitude, strength it's fierce and it's what's gotten you as far as this school and you'll need it to get through this year but be-careful Mum doesn't like to be messed with"_

Leaning across the seat Robert kissed my check and bumped fists with Liam as the SUV pulled up into the drop off zone at Eton Academy his security detail Kenny following him.

" _Of course I'm upset Len you know how Gemma gets under my skin she's so self centered she thinks she's better than anyone, she wouldn't stop chasing me last year or the two years previously she lied to the whole dang school last year after I became Rugby Captain."_

" _Told them we were dating she cost me the championship last year when she screamed so loud I missed the shot in the final seconds" "She's always comparing my biceps to the other boys she's always fooling with my hair you know I hate when girls mess with my hair!"_

" _Yes Tom cruise I know"_

Liam elbowed me as I laughed attempting to smoother his hair. " _I'm so relived I don't have to deal with her this year"_

" _Mum has to be stopped Liam!"_

" _Yea how do you suppose you'll do that?" "I don't know Liam but I'll find a way she won't tell me who I can and can't date or when"_

Taking a long slow sip of my yoo-hoo I leaned back as I looked up I saw Liam watching me. " _Your still nervous aren't you?"_

" _Aren't you brother of mine?"_

" _No"_

Now it was my turn to stare what? How could he not be nervous? Herefordshire International School For The Preforming Arts is one of thee most prestigious schools in the whole UK some would even say the world. Over 3,000 kids audition every year only 100 get chosen for each year level.

Robbie's warning stayed with me about needing my attitude and strength what did he know about this school? Was it even harder than I was fearing?

" _I'm not trying to be cocky Leni but I was ranked #1 for classical Pianist last year, I won the carpe diem championship of the world. I got to travel the world on tour last year preforming for millions doing the talk show circuit. I was chosen by Andre Graziani one of the most famous Opera singer to play on his latest alum and preform live with him"_

" _Who can say that Leni?" "No one can deny I have talent I deserve to be here to learn how to be even better there's so much more I want to learn so no I am not nervous" "I have no time to be cause we have only four years here to learn nerves bye-bye"_

" _Oh yeah I almost forgot you did all that superstar"_ I went to punch his arm but he pulled back

" _Ouch too hot to touch Princess shake those nerves you have what it takes Leni didn't you just win first place at the Dance Magical Competition worldwide?_

 _Didn't your performance inspire a new London based Musical that went on to win four Laurence awards?"_

" _Weren't you just featured in Keavy O'Davis's new music video? Ireland's hottest teen superstar"_

Liam yanked my arm causing me to spill my drink all over my skirt. I tried to remember the thrill of being on-stage as I danced with Keavy and her dancers she really is an amazing singer and very generous. The fans cheering for us, the way the talk show hosts gushed about my gift as they called it.

" _Maybe your right Liam"_

" _No maybe sis were twins we came into this world together and we will be amazing together what you go through I go through"_

I smiled as I laid my head on his shoulder trying desperate to get out this wet stain at a very bad spot.

" _Right older brother by four minutes"_ So why didn't I feel confident?


	8. Chapter 8

**Eleanor's p o v**

This school was amazing we stepped out of the SUV along with hundreds of other students coming from buses, cars, SUV's, Limos some walking. It looked like any other school in any country at first glance kids squealing as they ran to catch up with friends who they hadn't seen in months. Kids stretched out on the spacious and beautifully maintained yard under tresses on blankets. Kids taking selfies as they laughed talked played music on their mobile devices.

Than the differences stopped and became noticeable groups cheering as kids danced some in variations of two's, three's, fours, fives, some solo all had a cheering sections, kids recording them each group had a different style a different musical interpretation. There were kids playing various instruments sax, drums, guitar, violin, trumpet, keyboard, some on laptops laying down tracks.

Others were talking to themselves practicing lines monologues. A few had partners they rehearsed with or did warm-ups. The air was almost electric teachers were outside holding up signs directing new students where to go. I saw Liam checking out the girls so many beautiful ones here with real talent his eyes wandered as I felt my nerves come back with real force.

" _Your just as beautiful and as talented Leni stop worrying_ "

While his words were comforting they didn't ease my shaking or the tension in my shoulders and back. The grounds were immaculate beautiful roses amongst so many flowers. Mum would love this scenery a big fountain which had a glass backdrop sparkling of so many rainbow colors, the back-splash was black and was engraved with names, I pondered who's names were engraved were they former students who made contributions to the school? Kids who succeeded in the industry and were honored as alumni?

Water poured from five arches of god like statues. Herefordshire is hugely undeveloped our school sits on 500 archers the buildings are separated into three different parts taking up 50 archers it's only fifteen years old yet looked brand new. State of the art equipment, some of the industries best performers teach here. Going inside I saw the atmosphere hadn't changed music, dance, theater lines filled the air looking around I saw colorful motivational sayings filled the walls. I could see kids were now turning to notice us some whispering even pointing. I swallowed this stuff never bothered Liam but I hated it. Their stares made me feel so small. Some of their words jumped out at me

" _There's the twin terrors"_

" _Uh Liam thinks he's so hot"_

" _He is hot"_

" _His ego kills his flame"_

" _I heard she sleeps with her bodyguards and gets them fired"_

" _I bet she has diseases coming out her pores" "I heard she slept with the director of Keavy's music video that's how she got the job"_

Don't look Len keep your head up high don't give them the satisfaction of knowing their getting to you. How could I not let it get to me though? So many lies first I was a virgin I've never slept with anyone I earned my way to the video. I could feel my blood pressure rising my head was pounding.

" _Hey Princess!"_

Ignore them Len just keep walking

" _See they think thei_ r _too good to even talk to us commone_ rs"

" _Witch_ "

I felt Liam stop and turn but a heavy hand was placed on his shoulder as Marcus's voice gently calmed him down.

" _Don't do it Liam ignore them they don't know you or Princess Eleanor"_

" _Oh yes we do we kn_ ow _al_ l _ab_ o _ut our royalty!"_

One boy held up his middle finger as he yelled to us. Liam wrapped his arm around my waist as we tried to push through the rows of bodies it got too crowded we had to walk single file his hand slipped below to take mine.

" _Where are you going too good to talk to the lowly commoners?"_

I didn't see it happen it was all so fast. I was trying to squeeze between a girl playing the tuba and a dancer stretching his leg against the locker when I felt my feet leave the ground my body falling sideways as my head slammed into the lockers. Kids screamed jumping out of the way including the girl playing the tuba. Pain racked my burning face embarrassment rushed through every pour.

I heard their laughter as tears prickled behind my eyes pushing myself up I felt the burn in my ankle great don't tell me I was injured before I even stepped forward in a dance studio.

" _Princess graceful yup this confirms it she didn't get in for talent, At least not in the dance studio"_

Anger seeped through the hurt and embarrassment who the heck were they to judge me? Trying to stand was impossible too many bodies stepping over me too many instruments, bags on the floor would I have to lay here until the bell? I'd be late shivering I tried to find a wall an open locker to grasp.

Marcus's voice filled the air calling to Jack my guard they were panicking. I could hear it in the way their voices went up a few octaves.

" _Prin_ cess _Eleanor are you okay?"_

" _Their idiots ignore them people are scared by what they don't understand"_

I felt a hand reaching out to me looking up I saw a young man with shaggy blond hair smiling down at me. Taking his hand I felt myself being pulled up he was pretty strong.

" _I'm Damian Grant"_

" _T_ _hanks for the help I'm_

" _I_ _know who you are Princess but what would you like to be called?"_

" _I like Leni"_

" _Than Leni it is nice to.._

We were cut off by the sound of the bell.


	9. Chapter 9

**Eleanor's p o v**

Damian was gone when I looked back again replaced by Liam and the guards. Maybe I was going crazy.

" _Leni are you okay?"_

" _Who the hell did that? I'll tear them apart!"_

Liam grabbed my face almost as violently as the locker violated it.

" _I don't know who did it I didn't see them everything happened so fast."_

" _Well rest assure Princess will get to the bottom of this it won't happen again"_

Marcus and Jack were boiling mad as they grabbed our arms leading us away from the crowd of kids watching.

" _I don't want special treatment guys just let it go"_

" _No can do Princess and you know that if the queen gets a hold of this it will be our arses on the chopping block"_

Marcus and Jack scanned the room before we were allowed to enter which of course earned us quite a few strange looks. As we waited my own eyes scanned the halls who could of done it? So many kids so many possibilities

" _Damian!"_ I called out seeing him approaching he grinned coming closer he was cute around 5'3 with shaggy blond hair that was gelled up blue eyes that were so deep I felt like I was looking into an ocean.

" _Are you okay Leni?"_

" _I'm doing better thanks still a little shaken"_

" _Why are you standing outside?"_

I didn't have to answer because Marcus and Jack came back clearing us to go in kids were mumbling since they were held up from going inside.

" _They always do this?"_

" _Afraid so"_

Liam grabbed three seats for us while Marcus and Jack went into the back of the room along with two other guards that weren't with us. I wondered who else had guards? The room filled up quickly as the second bell rung scanning I guessed this classroom held around 20 to 30 kids which there seemed to be the max in here right now.

" _Why_ _are_ _you staring Liam?"_

Before Liam could answer Damian I heard Marcus whisper to Damian

" _With all due respect young lad it's your royal highness Prince Liam"_

" _Marcus stop that you know we hate that"_

Marcus looked like he was about to argue with Liam but the door swung shut as a young woman walked in her heals echoing as she walked. Dang she was nice looking long rich egg shell colored legs her black skirt clung to her stopping shortly after her thigh legs a body hugging white blouse made of what appeared to be silk matching black blazer her long hair which was light brown was in a high ponytail her makeup was just the right amount making her look around 16 maybe 18. Who was she? She looked too old to be in this class.

" _Good morning students I am Mrs._ _Kelly_ _Tanner and this is_ ** _Beginning Acting for the Camer_** ** _a_** **** ** _now would you all please stand and come forward so I can assign seats there will be no groaning no complaints this is my class and we will do things my way if you have an issue with that please don't waste my time being here the doors that way"_**

 **Everyone became very quite quickly grabbing their bags and scurrying front. She was quick to call out names boys in one row girls in the next within ten minutes everyone was assigned and sitting down of course Liam and I were across from each other. Damian was right in front of Liam but none of us dared to look back or talk behind me I felt the girl sigh muttering**

 **"'** ** _Mentally_** ** _Affected Teachers_** ** _Harassing_** ** _Students_** ** _should be a crime somewhere"_**

 **I couldn't help but snicker I mean it was funny even if Mrs. Tanner was only doing her job.**

 **"** ** _Got something funny to share Miss. Henstridge, Miss. Abbott?_**

 **We both looked up startled stuttering**

 **"** ** _No Ma'am"_**

 **" _Good than I am telling you right now shut your traps or get out"_**

 **No one even dared to oh or snicker thank god since I was already three times redder than I would ever thought possible sinking down into my seat. I glared at Liam who had that twinkle in his eyes he wouldn't let me live this one down, I'm sure by dinner time everyone in the palace would know about this.**

 **"** ** _Let me start by saying congratulations to all of you year nines you made it you got into the legendary Herefordshire International School for The Preforming Arts"_**

 **Everyone cheered at this point for a total of point two seconds before she spun silencing us with her looks.**

 **"** ** _Now turn to your neighbor in front of you on your side in back congratulate them but don't bother to learn their names because most of them won't make it past thee first term"_**

 **I turned to the girl in back of me the one who had made the comment**

 **"** ** _Congrats I'm Leni"_**

 **" _Nice to meet you Leni Congrats yourself I'm Unity"_**

 **We shock hands she was sweet with amazing green eyes reminding me of a gorgeous field of four leaf clovers her skin was so milky white it made me thirsty for some cookies and milk. She had the brightest smile with a twinkle in her eyes only hide by her blond bangs.**

 **I noticed she was wearing most of her hair up in a French twist yet there were a few curls hanging down across her sides. Why was I staring do hard? Pull yourself together Leni focus my head snapped back to what Mrs. Tanner was saying.**

 **"** ** _I bet you were told how special unique how talented you were back in your small hometowns, I bet you were number freaking one well get over it because here your all the best of the freaking best your no better than the person sitting next to you the person behind you the person guarding you"_**

 **Liam and I both blushed as did a boy sitting a few seats up well** **I just** **pinned one of the other rich kids. I watched him look towards his guard who stood a few feet away from Marcus and looked about his age. Even slouching I could see he was around 5'5 with perfect creamy milky skin not a blemish or pimple had touched his skin. I knew by just looking as his eyes scanned** **he was** **probably sponsored by a skin care product, his eyes were a deep chestnut/ hazel his hair was buzz cut but over his forehead was a few strands of blondish/ red up top was spiked and dyed neon pink he was unique. I knew it but there was something about him that calmed me, maybe it was the tattoo on the back of his neck a white unicorn with a wild beautiful colorful mane. I have always loved unicorns their so mystical.**

 **"** ** _But you have the unique chance here that no other school in the UK or the world can offer you here you have the chance to amerce yourself in the arts to really explore who it is you want to be where you want to go in life, you get to be creative you get to dream and learn how to make those dreams a reality you got it made right?"_**

 **" _Hell no you have it three times hard as any of your mates in the mornings you will be here no later than 6:30 am you will cram in a full day of studio classes there will be assignments from every single on of those classes which must be completed by the date they are due no exceptions from anyone after lunch you will have a full s_** ** _chedule_** ** _of academic classes_** ** _drop below_** ** _Merit_** ** _and your out!"_**

 **" _Let me make this very clear students we don't care what you dream of being if you dream of being on the cover of OK magazine of dancing at the royal ballet hall of staring in your own rap video that's great keep dreaming those dreams but the reality is for most of you that's all it will ever be a pipe dream, we can't make that happen for you…_**

 **Everyone was silent looking around I think we were all feeling confused and nervous at this point what were we doing here if the couldn't make that happen?**

 **"** ** _What we can give you is the knowledge of what it takes to get the discipline, strength you will need to make your dreams happen cause only you can take those pipe dreams and shoot them out of the sewer here you will learn what being a preforming artist means you will learn everything about your craft."_**

 **"** ** _H_** ** _ow to act on camera, on stage what the key differences are how to read music, you will learn every style of dance there is to learn, you will learn stage technique, lighting, sound there are no shortcuts to fame"_**

 **Shocked as I heard one girl call out above Mrs. Tanner** ****

 **" _Unless your royalty than you can buy your way in"_**

 **Mrs. Tanner stopped her eyes scanned until she focused in on the young blond girl who had dared to speak above her**

 **"** ** _OUT! Do you have a hearing problem Miss. Casanova? Let me spell it for you O. U. T N. O. W!" I will not tolerate rudeness self entitlement you think that your the only one who worked their arse off to get here? Well your not everyone here is talented you wouldn't be here if you weren't your no more special than any of the other 500_** ** _Year Nines_** ** _here so get out!"_**

 **The girl quickly grabbed her stuff as her face flushed and she ran out of the room tears falling down her checks.** ****

 **"** ** _That includes the royal highnesses no one got in here by chance by paying everyone of you worked hard to get here but_** ** _only some of you have the dedication, determination and raw talent to make it past these four walls it won't be easy but if you are willing to put in the long demanding hours than we are here to help you find your inner artist and we will help you shine"_**

 **"** ** _Now for the first of those assignments I need a volunteer Kit Halstead please come forth and hand out these journals"_**

 **The unicorn boy stood up rushing forward grabbing the stack from Mrs. Tanners hands I could see he was shaking slightly as he handed them out.**

 **"** ** _Pretty boy is pretty fly isn't he?"_**

 **I felt Unity's breath on my neck as I looked back**

 **"** ** _Um yeah he is pretty cute"_**

 **" _Forget it girl I'm pretty sure he plays for the other team"_**

 **Team? What was she talking about? Were we going to be divided into teams? How did she know?**

 **" _These journals will not be graded however they will be required every day I want you to record your thoughts, feelings, how you see the world around you the people in your life how their actions words effect you if something brings back a memory._**

 ** _I want you to record that moment and how it made you feel what did you do with those feelings?" I won't grade them I won't judge you and I will never tell anything I read unless I feel that there is something that poses as a life threating danger to yourself or others." "Don't be afraid to express yourself expression is what makes an artist unique"_**

 **She handed out our schedules Liam glanced at mine as I felt Unity lean over mine squealing**

 **"** ** _Girl were in every class together!"_**

 **I barely knew her but her excitement was catching so I offered my hand for a high five along with Liam. Looking over my list I wondered what each class each teacher would be like.**

 **Beginning Acting for the Camer** **a- Mrs. Tanner**

 **Preformance Essemble- Mrs. Ruskin**

 _ **Musical Theater-**_ **Mrs. Kent**

 **Voice and Dictation- Ms. Hurley**

 **Form & Analysis – Ms. Nydia**

AP Music Theory -Mr. Iver

 **Vocal Production- Ms. Hurley**

 **Contemporary- Monday and Tuesday -Mr. Lambent**

 **Wednesday Combo Mrs. Jada**

 **Thursday Jazz Ensemble- Ms. Playfair**

 **Friday- Pas De Deux- Mrs. Saxton**

 **Lunch**

 **Math- Mr. Antonio**

 **Science- Ms. Megan**

 **British History Term 1-2 / World History[Term 3-4] Mrs. Helen**

 **"** ** _Seriously Your Royal highness why are you staring at me?"_**

 **" _Okay A Damian never call me that again it's Liam I hate titles and B you look so familiar it's like I know you from somewhere or something"_**

 **Damian sighed rolling his eyes why was he being rude? Liam was only asking a question I shoved the journal in my school bag.**

 **"** ** _Dude were on the same football team we scored the winning goal yesterday"_**

 **I gagged coughing as my brother's face flushed and he sank down I couldn't help but start to laugh.**

 **"** ** _Eleanor_** ** _Henstridge_** ** _the head master wants to see you now"_**

 **I shot up what the hell did he want? I hadn't done anything gulping I rose exchanging looks with Liam who shrugged Jack followed me out of the room down the hall as my nerves shock.** ****


	10. Chapter 10

**Eleanor's p o v**

" _Good Morning your Royal Highness"_

I saw the sign on the secretary's desk saying Mrs. Highland as she stood up to curtsey's as tradition whenever a member of the royal family is present a thing I never understood. I mean I am only thirteen what could I have done in life to order such respect or merit? You don't bow to any other 13 year old or person in general. I mean I can understand my mum and dad they are thee King and Queen but I'm just a kid.

" _Good Morning Mrs._ _H_ _ighland how are you today?"_

" _I'm well your royal highness and you?"_

" _I'm alright a bit confused as to why I am here though?"_

" _Mr. Knight has summered you"_

Who is Mr. Knight? Why did he want to see me? She was so stunned by my mere presence that she was stumbling just to trying to get up. Seriously why were people so star struck by royalty? An older gentleman stepped out of an office he was dressed very distinguished in a black suit.

" _Princess Eleanor I am headmaster Mr. Knight please step into my office thank you for coming"_

He didn't bow to me which I didn't mind but I'm sure my mum would be livid.

" _I understand your confusion since we didn't meet prior at the orientation meeting for all year nines due to your absence from the event"_

 _'My apologies on that regard Mr. Knight it was my family's annual country tour Mum wouldn't let us skip it"_

" _Ah yes frocking around the country in a jet a perfect way for a young artist to send their summer"_

Was he trying to mock me?

" _Most students here are spending their summer taking extra dance classes working in_ _thee theater"_

I got the sense that he was making fun of me that he thought I was just here to pass time that I didn't give a damn about being a professional artist.

" _Missing something as crucial as_ _orientation_ _shows one trues character"_

He was trying to say I wasn't committed wasn't he? Who the heck did he think he was he didn't know me or how much time effort I spent practicing my technique learning moves that most kids would give up on after an hour.

" _Excuse me sir' but this tour is a royal commitment that we are excepted to make every year I have an obligation as a member of the royal family, but it will not lessen my commitment to fulfilling my dreams of being a successful and respectable artist"_

" _Of course it doesn't princess"_

The way he said princess was making me apprehensive he seemed quite rude and disrespectful. I know my mum would be ready to behead him.

" _We haven't even gotten past first period yet Princess and you've already gotten into one fight we here at Herefordshire have a zero tolerance policy which means we will not make any exceptions royalty or not one more fight and your out"_

" _It wasn't a fight Sir' I was attacked!"_

" _Liar listen here little girl you maybe use to lies from your family"_

The way he looked at me when he said 'Your Family' made me shake he seemed so disgusted so repulsed by the idea of royalty that it made me afraid. Why did I feel like I was being attacked he should be defending me not accusing me I felt anger rising inside my blood and sickness rising from my stomach.

" _With all due respect Sir' I was not raised to lie. I was raised to respect my adults and to be truthful"_

" _I didn't fight anyone Sir and that's the truth you can ask anyone who saw it my brother our guards"_

" _I did in fact ask witness and everyone agreed that you were a participant in the fight so I will not tell you again Princess one more indecent of any nature and your out if you can't hack it Princess I suggest you grow a pair this school is not for the faint of heart"_

His words sent waves of fear coursing through me was he serious? How could I be held responsible for the actions of others towards me? 


	11. Chapter 11

**Leni**

" _How was school today darling?"_

Mum was the first to ask as we sat down for dinner what was I suppose to say? Liam answered for me.

" _Great Mum!"_

" _I met loads of new mates I am already up for squad leader for my section in bagpipes which is almost impossible for a year 9"_

Dad answered first smiling as Prudence, Katie, Baker three of our servants set food down on the table.

" _Excellent son your mother and I are very proud of you"_

" _Thanks dad"_

" _Of course Liam what your father doesn't say is we except nothing less than stellar performances from all of you kids you are thee Princes and Princess of England none the less well done Liam"_

" _Now lil bro did you meet any girls?"_

Robert punched Liam's upper arm as he grunted out attempting to hit him back but earned a look from Mum stopping him.

" _Oh before I forget Mum Mr. Kurt told me to tell you that your looking radiant_ _and he sends his hello"_

" _A_ _h yes Bryan how is he?"_

" _He is well he got married last year they have a baby girl who's three months"_

" _Who is this Bryan dear?"_

" _Oh just an old mate I went to school with Simon no worries"_

Thank god no one was focusing on me now.

" _I love this school Mum it's awesome so many talented kids so many professionals who have so much to teach us oh I got invited to several birthday parties"_

" _That's wonderful dear_ _make sure you give them to Rachael she'll run it through your social calender I highly doubt you'll be able to attend them but we shall see if not we will send our regards along with a present"_

" _Mrs. Ruskin offered to help me with some of my moves after class the only yucky part was getting lost trying to find classes but the teachers were mad cool since it was our first day"_

Mum wiped her mouth as I pushed food around on my plate, looking at Liam strangely.

" _Liam darling what is ''mad cool_?"

My Brother's laughter filled the room as Mum looked confused. " _Sorry Mum but mad cool is American slang for awesome"_

" _Where did you learn that term from?"_

" _My new friend Roger he's from California he's on a scholarship he's a pretty cool dude been playing basketball since he was three he use to travel with a semi professional b-ball team until he was ten than he was chosen for a national dance team"_

" _He sounds charming Liam I would love to have him over one night to meet him right Simon?"_

" _Yea darling Helena but right now I would really love to hear how my daughter's first day was"_

 _W_ hat was I suppose to say? Sometimes I swear Robert and Liam can read my mind cause Robert started talking.

" _I was voted president of my class I volunteered to be a big brother to help new classmates, I made captain of our school rugby team. I'm up for an award in the young leaders of the world Mr. Price was inspired because I increased sales over the summer for our final class trip to Africa to help children with no schools by getting the whole class involved we managed to raise 80.6588"_

" _Excellent Robert were very proud of you you will make the nation proud when you take over my throne for king of England you always set the right examples for your brother and sister right Simon?"_

" _Of course my love but right now I just want to hear about Leni's day"_

Why dad? Why did you care so much couldn't you just let me be invisible? How was I suppose to tell him I got attacked by classmates laughed at by my headmaster. Told I was liar threatened, got tripped in the hall every time I changed classes. Several girls try to shove my head down the toilet had my bag dumped out while while they threw me to the ground stole my money used my lipstick that I'm not even allowed to wear to write on the mirrors "Leni the Loser" "Princess Pee-Pee" all because of that stupid stain on my skirt thanks to Liam's inpatient fingers.

While another student filmed it was I suppose to tell them that one teacher told me I was too dumb to pass year nine all because I was afraid to answer thanks to the constant kicking of my chair from the girl behind me who kept whispering she was going to kill me.

" _Oh Mum Dad I got a date for Friday her name's Lauren"_

Liam interrupted before I could speak

" _She's smoking hot!"_

Robert gave Liam a thumbs up pounding his back

" _Way to go Lil bro"_

" _Liam where is this young lady from?" Is she from high society?" Or is she a commoner?"_

Mum said the word with a look of horror.

" _How old is she?" "Where is she from?"_ _"_ _What's her major?" "Who are her parents?"What will you tell Gemma if you decide to take this Lauren Saturday?"_

" _I didn't invite Gemma Mum you did"_

" _Yes dear but she has been invited it would be rude to cancel on her now"_

" _You told Leni she could find another date how is that different?"_

" _Because your sister has legit reasons as to why she doesn't want the prince escorting her" "_ _There is no reason Liam as to why Gemma shouldn't carry on with her duties as your escort she is a lovely young lady from an acceptable family" "Gemma's family has been patriarchs of helping this family sustain for generations after generations"_

" _So Eleanor have you had any success in finding a replacement? If not we must make the final arrangements for the prince of turkey to come"_

Memories of my last date with him filled my mind I was 12 he was 14we were at the inauguration of president Obama our mums made us dance while everyone watched which was televised. I was so tense and nervous he smelled like fish and rotten eggs, his breath reminded me of an onion truck and his hands were cold. He couldn't seem to control them either even as we danced in front of millions of people he slipped his hands up my dress and undid my bra snapping me with it.

I desperately needed to break free of this date but how was I suppose to do that when I had been too busy crying in the bathroom to find a boy to ask, she would never understand she was beautiful elegant she never allowed anyone to see any weakness. Not that she had any either she is the strongest person I know no one makes her afraid or dares threatens her. She would be so ashamed of me if she knew what had happened to me how I handled it.

" _Um yea I did Mum"_

Liam looked at me like why was I lying? He knew I hadn't asked anyone I know it's wrong but I couldn't stop myself I had to get mum off my case.

" _Yea Mum I asked this really nice bloke"_

" _What's his name sweetie?"_

Name… Name.. shit I didn't think that far ahead everyone was staring at me I could feel Cyrus's eyes borrowing into me think fast Eleanor think name a boy you meet today who did you meet?

" _I bet she didn't meet anyone she's lying just to save face"_

" _Shut up uncle Cyrus I did meet a bloke he's a year niner like me his name's Damian and he agreed to escort me"_

How could I lied to Mum and dad it's wrong I should be ashamed more importantly how would I ask Damian I barely knew him, he wouldn't even look at me how was I suppose to ask him to such an exclusive event. After dinner I sat at my vanity attempting to write in my journal. Sighing I went over to my ipod and placed it in the dock turning up the volume I blasted my favorite singer her songs had a dark twist to them but the messages were really about hope and never giving up. 

_Someday Maybe Someday someway somehow_

 _I'll find a way out of this beautiful darkness_

 _I can't find happiness without Lithium_

 _When will I see a brighter side_

 _They tell me it's there I search I pray_

 _But I can't find the light_

Listening to the killer piano track I felt myself swaying to the magic that was her voice so rich so full of pain, yet there was a happiness there to.

 _I'm trapped in these walls of pain_

 _Someone please find me don't you hear me calling out_

 _I can't figure out how to get out of my sorrow_

 _I want to let it go I want to scream to the world_

 _Fuck it all let go of this bitterness this pain that swallows me whole_

 _Emptiness loneliness I feel so cold so abounded_

 _Hope are you too late? Where are you when I need saving?_

 _Music is my only key my only hope for salvation_

 _I cling to these ivory keys please don't leave me hear my message_

As I swayed I could feel the words leave my brain escaping through my fingers.

 _ **Dear Envy**_

 _ **Yup that's your new name dear journal envy why you may ask? Simple because you are everything that I wish I could be everything I am not. I have all the money anyone could ask for designers begging to dress me. My name is on every magazine cover I'm known all over the world girls in every country want to be me, boys in those countries want to sleep with me. Yet here in england my own hometown I am hated by my own peers,** **W** **hy?**_

 _ **I didn't ask to be born with this tittle this money, I don't flaunt it I don't even want it. I just want to be normal to be accepted yet I never am ever since I can remember I have been labeled I have been called vicious names attacked every bloody day is the frigging same. Hell… Sometimes I wish the earth would just Swallow me up so I could be wrapped in the unchanging black of death. Black is a lovely color, there is only one shade – not like those others.**_

 _ **Always changing, never sincere. Like all the other girls at school. They act different to each person they know. They are completely undefined. It's like they have no goal in life but to make others' miserable. I just want to lay down and die sometimes I mean I never would take my own life I'm not that dark but what I am trying to say that when I lay alone in my room in the dark I feel safe I feel loved darkness doesn't lie it doesn't change it's color. I like being invisible no one sees you than there's no expectations. My mum excepts me to carry on the monarchy to be a legacy that little girls will look up to in fifty years time. How am I suppose to live up to those who came before me?**_

 _ **Ladies of virtue statue respectability ladies** **on my** **dad's side. Queen** **Victoria** **who was born in 1837 she took over the throne at age 17 she is associated with Britain's great age of industrial expansion, economic progress and, especially, empire. At her death, it was said, Britain had a worldwide empire on which the sun never set. I admire the woman on my dad's side** **Victori** **a had a gift for drawing and painting; educated by a governess at home, she was a natural diarist and kept a regular journal throughout her life. Maybe I am like her in some ways but she had a strength inside I can only wish to possess.**_

 _ **She died at Osborne House on the Isle of Wight, on 22 January 1901 after a reign which lasted almost 64 years, the longest in British history. Than there's my great grand-mum Queen Elizabeth.** **Like her parents, Elizabeth was heavily involved in the war effort during the Second World War, serving in the women's branch of the British Army known as the Auxiliary Territorial Service, training as a driver and mechanic.** **She ruled all of england without a king by her side she encouraged education starting programs so no kid failed she made it so every school had enough teachers and enough time to properly teach. She never married one of her smartest moves so she had full power over all of England until my grandad Simon was old enough to take over the throne.**_

 _ **I**_ _ **can never measure up to them or to my mum I mean she's the queen she's beautiful smart she rules with grace dignity fairness she listens to the people she really cares about what they want.**_ _ **She takes after her Mum Alexandra The grand dutches of oxford who leads with such power grace people don't dare cross her, I know my mum doesn't like her but I love my dutchie she never shades things she tells it as it is she don't care what anyone says about her. She has such inner strength.**_ __

 _ **I wish I could say that I didn't care**_ _ **about what these girls say**_ _ **… but it hurts. I mean, I know I'm ugly. It's not like it's any news to me… but for some reason it still hurts.**_ _ **Maybe I'm just too weak to be in this family.**_

" _Eleanor sweetie time for bed lets go babe"_

" _Coming Mum"_

Quickly I hid my journal getting up as Mum came inside dressed in her nightgown she waited for me to crawl into bed laying close to her side smelling her sweet cinnamon scent a perfume she never wore in public but just in her home.

" _What story do you want to hear my love?"_

" _Read to me thee one about river will ya mum? "Yes baby whatever you want"_

 _Once there was a girl named "River" She hated her name because all the other kids made fun of her she didn't have any friends. River would play by herself all the time because none of the other kids wanted her around. One day River went for a walk by herself she went down to the woods into the deepest part where there lay a gentle stream where she would kick rocks in she would talk to the river she felt at one with this gentle stream._

 _Everyday she would wish for a friend, it never worked until the one day when she stayed out to late she got lost into the deep forest. She was scared she was lonely she paused at the edge of the river feeling defeated the water was much deeper at this part in the forest she jumped in letting the powerful current take her away. As darkness surrounded her she surrendered to it relief filling her she was finally home. Suddenly air rushed to her struggling lungs looking up she was shocked to see she was staring into the bluest eyes she had ever seen._

" _Hello who are you?"_

Said the little girl

" _Why did you jump don't you know how strong this current is?"_

River was afraid to say her name afraid the girl would laugh like all the other kids did they would say cruel things like

" _Why don't you jump in river and wash away"_

The little girl smiled.

" _It's okay there's no need to be afraid I am current again I ask you what is your name?"_

River stared for the longest time before she started to laugh

" _That's funny your name is current I am river"_

" _Really your not just making fun of me?_

" _No why would I do that?" "That's cruel"_

Current extended her hand helping River up

" _I like to come out here because watching the river is magical you never know where it's going or where it came from but sometimes you can find the strangest and best presents floating down it"_

" _Like today we met and a new friendship can began if you want it that is"_

River was almost afraid to answer could this be true? She took the plunge and said yes.

" _From that day on River and Current were best friends and they followed each other where ever the other went"_

" _That's such a pretty story mummy but do you think it can be true?"_

" _Of course I can be baby maybe not in the same way as this story but plenty of friendships start out in the most unlikely places growing up is never easy my love you know when I was a little girl we didn't have a lot of money I couldn't afford the best cars thee best education but I still managed to get to where I am at, but having money dose not mean you don't have problems if you ever need to talk I am here baby girl being different is never easy but different doesn't have to mean bad"_

She kissed the top of my head tucking me in deep

" _Thanks mum but I'm okay just tired and a little stressed"_

My dad came in at that moment to say goodnight and say a prayer. He is so strong I prayed I would never be a disappointment to him or my mum.


	12. Chapter 12

**Eleanor's p o v**

I was beyond nervous what if Damian hated chocolates? I clutched the box of royal chocolates like it was a lifeline. Sweating, breathing heavy my palms felt like ice I couldn't do much about how I looked in my uniform which did nothing to flatter me at all. Black Skirt which hung just above my knees black polo with the school logo and name in the right breast corner in light pink and black blazer. My ladies in waiting had braided my hair in a French braid, wrapped it around the back of my head. Breath check minty good.

Even rehearsing in the mirror did little to help my confidence. It did more damage than good when my brothers caught me and started laughing teasing me. Was it cold? Was it just me? Taking a deep breath I walked to where Damian was by his locker laughing with his friends Kit I think was his name and Ashok Liam's friend. As soon as I approached they became quite Ash almost pissed himself bowing to me rolling my eyes. I tried not to get snappy he was sweet but really he's known me since we were like five. His family was almost as rich as we were he didn't need to bow.

" _Damian can we talk please?"_

" _Um sure Leni"_

Damian smiled at me as he offered to take my books. I didn't notice how bad I was shaking until the weight was lifted from my arms thanking him I sighed as we went outside to the fountain where kids were still milling around reading playing instruments.

" _What's going on Leni?"_

" _Damian first I just want to say_ _t_ _hank you for helping me yesterday"_

I pulled out the box from my school bag shaking slightly as I handed it to him. A slight chill ripped through blowing across the water spraying me jumping back a little. I found myself crashing into him. Putting his arms out to steady me he dropped the books but caught me. I ended up staring into his eyes which were soft non-judgmental. Just get the words out Leni it's either a yes or no it's not like your not use to rejection. Brushing a piece of hair out of my face his fingers stayed on my skin sending warmth through me.

" _So how do you like this school so far?"_ Lame Len real lame.

" _Pretty cool so far a lot bigger than my old one but the teachers are nice and very knowledgeable I mean the kids are kids some immature some cool"_

" _What about you Leni has it gotten any easier?"_

I could tell the truth and say no it's been horrible but I didn't want to look weak or like I was whining so I smiled and nodded.

" _There's been a few rough bumps but yeah it's been okay thanks again for yesterday you didn't need to help you don't know me so it was pretty brave to put yourself out there you could have been made a target"_

" _I never even thought about that Leni I just saw a beautiful girl in trouble and I can't let that go"_

" _Well it means a lot to me Damian so thank you"_

Before I could lose the nerve I kissed his check feeling him stiffen great was it too much? He stared at me what was he thinking?

" _Would you do me another favor and be my escort to my birthday parade this Saturday?"_ Please say yes please don't laugh at me or reject me. I was holding my breath which was starting to hurt.

" _Yes it would be my honor Leni it would also be an early birthday present for me as well my birthday is this Wednesday"_

I reached over and hugged him

" _Thank you Damian this is such an awesome present"_

Damian reached down and picked up the books before slipping his arm around my waist. He slipped the chocolates into his bag as we headed to class his hand slipped into my open hand.


	13. Chapter 13

**Eleanor**

" _Uh here comes Princess Prissy"_

" _Wait you mean Princess Pissy"_

The girls in the locker room started laughing. The whizzing of the ball hurled past me slamming against the locker right by my head scared me they laughed harder.

" _Watch it or she'll piss herself again"_ I didn't even have the chance to turn before I was being slammed against the lockers the sharp piercing of the metal scraped my skin. I felt them grab my thighs holding them up ripping off my stockings as two girls held my arms while one dumped Mt. Dew all over my tights. Pain ripped across my face as one of the girls sat on my stomach hitting me across my face tears welled up as I begged her to stop.

" _Take a picture Jasmine make sure we tweet this and instagram this"_

" _Oh what's the hashtag?"_

" _I know #PrincessPissy"_

" _Smile Princess"_

The girl sitting on me stopped hitting me to take a picture of me crying. Seconds later she took my wet stockings and started hitting me I tried to fight her off but the other girls held my arms yanking them pain tore through me.

" _Please stop!" "Please I didn't do anything wrong"_

" _Shut-up bitch"_

The sting of the fabric lingered hands pushed the back of my head against the metal as they stood up taking turns hitting me harder and harder. I finally got a good look at my attacker she had shoulder length red hair brown eyes she was around 5'5 she was thinner than I was with a dancer's body.

" _Your nothing Princess you don't have what it takes to make it here we all worked our arses off to get here_ _we didn't pay our way in"_

Her hand slapped me across my face, I was too scared to fight back but why did they all assume I didn't earn my way into here? I have trained as a dancer in every style since I was three, I took every style from the best instructors in the world every day I spent hours and hours practicing we even had a studio built at the palace so I could practice after most normal ones closed at night. Every weekend I spent locked away learning new moves off youtube and dance sites. Mum hired a private dance teacher from Russia to help me when studios were closed. I kept in the best shape possible up early everyday to stretch and work out in the gym.

I stayed on a strict diet even at holidays even when Dutchie tried to force feed me caviar and cakes, I won competitions all over the globe year after year. How did they think they could just to assume anything about me?

" _Can't answer Princess? Didn't your mum the queen of sluts teach you any respect?"_

" _Don't talk about my mum that way!"_

" _Oh what are you going to do Princess number one?"_

" _I'll teach you a lesson Princess"_

Pain blinded me as her fist made connect with my right eye the force knocked me to my knees as they kept whipping me with my tights which were soggy and smelled bad now. Their laughter echoed as I tried to squirm away my shoulders trembled as I cried silently, heart pounding why was she doing this? How could someone be this cruel? I didn't even know her.

" _Answer me Princess"_

I hadn't even heard the question but I was afraid to say anything.

" _Did you learn your lesson?"_

What lesson? I felt sick to my stomach.

" _Did you learn not to be rude?" "Say it with me" "I'm a loser I don't deserve to be here"_

I stay silent which pisses her off suddenly she grabs me by my shirt pulling me up slamming me against the locker pain shooting through my back made me twist in spasms blinding burning pain shot through my eye my head making me sicker and dizzier, I didn't even feel them when they ripped open my shirt whipping me across my chest with my tights.

" _Leni the loser Leni the loser"_

They started chanting

" _Y_ _our going to learn really quick leni your mother may be the queen but your nothing here your nothing period we all know you were a mistake the spare to the spare to the heir you weren't planned for you just came along like a spawn a disgrace to the people to your mother and to the monarchy"_

Throwing me to the ground I crumbled but only for a second before she yanked me up by my hair so forcefully she ripped a braid right out I screamed as they laughed

" _Now be a good pig and_ _shut up_ _"_

She shoved my wet nasty tights into my mouth slamming my head down against the floor kicking me hard in my stomach.

" _What do you think your doing?"_

There was a voice which sounded familiar.

" _Do you know who this is?"_

She never let them answer

" _Do you know what the_ _penalty_ _is for_ _treason against the crown_ _?"_ " _Because I know the queen personally would love to throw thee likes of you three in prison for a very long time when she finds out what you did to her daughter she'll have you all beheaded she'll bring shame upon your families and you will be expelled from school and banned from England"_

I don't even look up I have no energy but who ever she was scared the living breath out of them she was still yelling as I felt hands pulling me up. I felt heavy dizzy and sick my eyes couldn't seem to focus as I heard whoever it was saying

" _She needs an ambulance she's losing conscious"_

It was the last comment I heard.


	14. Chapter 14

**Liam's p o v**

" _Ashok you weren't lying man this school is amazing!"_

High-fiving my best mate Ashok Bachu who recommended this school to me his older sister Trandad goes here. He's been raving about this place for almost two years now.

" _I told you man this place is everything you could ever hope for in a school amazing teachers, talented kids, pretty girls"_

He winked at one girl as he called out

" _Hey baby"_

The year 11 looked at him flipped her hair and turned to her friends giggling as they blew past us.

" _Man give it up dude she's way out of your league there's no shot at her"_

" _Man you don't know that some girls dig a younger man"_

" _Ash your barely a boy never mind a man"_

Ash gasped as he threw a hack-sack at Roger who dodged it allowing the ball to sail past him Ash grunted running after it as I relaxed settling back into my comfortable chair in the middle of the indoor courtyard

" _So Damian I hear you scored a date with thee princess"_

" _What did you say to get that fine piece..."_

" _Yo my sister man be cool"_

Roger held up his hands laughing turning to Damian who was looking nervous now I got closer

" _But fro real little man she is my twin which means we have a bond that no one else can share when she hurts I hurt and I don't like to hurt so you hurt her you hurt me capiche?"_

" _Yea we cool man I promise I won't hurt her she asked me out I'm doing it as favor to her"_

" _You said yes right?"_

" _No man I said no to the frigging princess of england" "Do I look stupid?"_

Damian shoved Roger laughing

" _Damian your so lucky man I've been trying to get into her bed for years"_

" _Dude Ash my twin sister seriously gross"_

" _Aw don't be shocked Liam all man are pigs except you baby"_

I grinned as Lauren came up sitting on my lap damn she's gorgeous wrapping my arms around her delicate waist I pulled her in for a kiss.

" _That's why I love you Liam no drama no games"_

" _Bitch you better not get use to that lap cause that crown is mine now get off my man's lap I will fight you and I will win"_

My whole body became rigid as I heard that prickly sharp voice cut through the air.

" _Gemma!"_

" _Hello baby" "Now move Bitch"_

Gemma was on Lauren in seconds yanking her up shoving her to the ground her three friends Emily, Natalie and April all behind her glaring at Lauren who ran off scared. Sighing I got up

" _Gemma really was that necessary?"_

" _No but I enjoyed it as much as I would like to stay and chat Liam your sister needs you"_

Eleanor? What happened to Eleanor my heart started racing as I followed Gemma running at full speed. 


	15. Chapter 15

**Liam**

" _Who did this to you?"_

I was so angry I could kill someone Leni was curled up in a ball in the locker room she hadn't moved or said a word in twenty minutes. Her face was covered in red blotches which were just starting to form but they were already angry looking in another day or so they would be atrocious. Dark bruises were starting to line her eyes

" _Leni please talk to me"_

She wouldn't even look at me so I sat down by her rubbing her back next to another girl who's name I couldn't remember.

" _I swear Leni they will pay just give me their names they can't get away with this"_

Why wouldn't she talk to me? Were twins we tell each other everything all the time we've never kept secrets from each other she couldn't start now. Seeing her battered bruised bloody face filled me with such an unexplainable pain a searing anger. Slowly she looked up her eyes held such sadness, fear my heart melted. I felt sick to my stomach reaching out to her she slowly crawled into my lap with help from the blond girl who was sitting by her rubbing her arm. I saw her knuckles covered in scratches and blood from trying to fight them off. All I wanted in that moment was to take away her pain I would do anything to see her smile hear her laugh. Burying her face into my chest I felt her body tremble.

" _We have to tell someone Leni"_

" _NO!" Liam please you have to promise me you won't tell anyone no one can know about this ever"_

" _Why Leni what they did was a crime in so many ways"_

" _It doesn't matter Liam I'll be expelled"_

" _What that's crazy why would you be expelled?"_

" _The headmaster here hates our family he threatened me yesterday_ _telling will only make this worse please"_

Leni's face held such pleading that there was no way I could say no.

" _Leni this isn't right headmaster Knight is an idiot he never believes us when a kid reports bullying that would make a blemish on his perfect school record and god forbid we have that"_

" _That's bullocks"_

" _I agree Gemma but there's nothing we can do about him there is someone we have on our side though Miss. Sparks she's a year nine form teacher who actually cares about us kids she has no tolerance for kids who bully she'll help you"_

" _Thanks …_

" _It's Unity Liam no problem help me get her up she's pretty weak"_

We managed to get her down the hall to an elevator Leni leaned against my chest her breathing a bit labored. Unity lead us down the hall she didn't stop to knock she just barged into Miss. Spark's office scaring her half to death but she quickly recovered jumping up running over.

" _Unity sweetheart what happened?"_

" _Miss. Sparks this is Leni she needs your help she was beat up by three girls"_

" _Bring her in lets talk"_

She asked us to wait outside as she took Leni into a back room with Unity. I couldn't help but pace from fear " _Pacing isn't going to help Liam"_ My heals spun around so fast they caused a few sparks to shoot up what was she even doing here? Since when did she go to this school?

" _You want names don't you Liam?"_

My eyes must be blazing right now grabbing her arm I pulled her close so I was staring into her bright devilish brilliant green eyes.

" _You know I do Gemma what games are you playing?"_

" _No games Liam just the truth I can give you what you want"_

" _Please Gemma I would do anything"_

" _Relax Romeo I said I could didn't say I would"_

" _You said you weren't playing games Gemma what the hell do you call this?" Your heartless Gemma my sister's in there beating to a bloody pulp and you won't even help me?"_

" _I didn't say I wouldn't"_

" _You just said"_

" _Liam I know what I said look I will make this simple"_

She pressed herself closer to me touching my nose her expensive French Perfume filled my nostrils. The feel of her delicate smooth skin left me tingling her eyes are so seductive grabbing my hands she placed them on her full bum. Why was my body reacting like this? She was threating my sister yet my whole body wanted her

" _We both want things baby wanting is good it makes you really think it makes you dream, dreams take work without work dreams are just hopeless aspirations my dream Liam is one day to be queen"_

She was so close now we would be glued if we stuck any closer her breath was against my ear

" _Your queen, Your mum has the same vision as I do"_

She kissed my nose why was I so nervous shaking? Why were certain parts of me so tight I thought they would explode. Deep breath exhale..

" _We just need you to see things clearer so here's what's going to happen Liam your going to dump that commoner Laura..Karla whatever the heck her name was"_

" _It's Lauren Gemma"_

" _Uh whatever just dump her and agree to let me escort you to your birthday parade oh and sign my contract"_

Contract was she kidding me were kids she only turned 14 in July she's not that much older than I am.

" _Y_ _ou sign Liam I give you the names of those bitches that beat Leni but seriously she needs to get some back bones if she's going to survive here it's up to you Liam just remember I can make her or break her if you sign. I will make sure no one touches her here ever again if you don't or_ _i_ _f you break my contract I can and I will make her life a living hell"_

Did she just threaten my sister? I pushed her back staring into her eyes they held no hint of teasing she was on a mission no one was going to stop her but she had no idea how far I would go to protect my sister she wasn't going to use Leni step on her to get what she wanted.

" _I'll do what you want Gemma but not because I give a rat's bum about you or your vision because I love my sister"_

Once I signed she grinned pulling me to her kissing her I pushed her away after a minute as she turned swinging her hips leaving. Quickly I texted Robert, Damian we needed help I didn't care if Leni would kill me she couldn't do this alone and I didn't trust Gemma at all.


	16. Chapter 16

**Eleanor**

" _Mum can't know about this Liam ever"_

" _Why Leni she could help"_

" _No Liam she would only make it worse please you have to promise me"_

The fall chill swept through central London as Liam and I stood in front of the Star-bucks waiting for our brother even the hot tea's didn't do anything to help take the chill out of our bones. Pulling my hoodie up further. I cuddled against Liam who was doing about as good as I was jeans long sleeved t-shirts and hoodies. We looked like any normal teens on any given after school day except the whole body guards thing. I really needed Liam to be on my side now.

" _I don't like this but fine will see what Robbie says than I'll make my decision"_

" _Where is Robbie?"_

" _Behind you Princess bit chilly isn't it?"_

" _Robbie!"_

I screamed throwing my arms around him his whole body shock with laughter he tried to pry me off.

" _Lets go inside there and talk about this secret meeting that Liam called"_

" _I'm starving man can you spot your lil bro some money for some wings?"_

Robbie rolled his eyes ruffling Liam's hair as we walked into the Wild Wings restaurant searching for Damian finally finding him. Two dozen wings later finally full Liam filled Robbie in on what was going in. Looking at me I felt Robbie scrutinize me from head to toe.

" _Who did this to you Leni?"_

" _It's not important Robbie" "What's important now is that Leni needs to learn how to defend herself it's the only way I will feel confident with her being by herself"_

" _Mum can't know Robbie you know she'll only make matters worse"_

" _Fine Leni but Liam's right you need to be able to defend_ _your_ _self" "I know how you can do that but you have to be willing to do the work"_

" _I'll do anything Robbie I hate being their target"_

" _Good_ _martial arts_ _will give you that edge but I can't take you to mine it's too public the paps will see you and mum will know instantly she'll be an endless stream of questions than"_

" _Damian do you know any place in your hometown?"_

" _Yea as a matter of a fact I take lessons at Dominic'_ _Taekwondo_ _Studio I could get her in pretty easy"_

" _Great lets go"_

The drive to Ledbury was around 45 minutes but it gave us time to talk Robbie questioned him on everything

" _So how long have you lived in Ledbury?"_

" _For eleven years I was born into Kingstone but my mum wanted a change of scenery a bigger town_ _she's from Rome Italy so she's use to being surrounded by culture, family, friends, people in general but she didn't like London a friend recommended Ledbury they ended up opening a restaurant"_

" _Your mum ever marry?"_

" _No she said her business was her life she's always dreamed of opening up a restaurant she spent every ounce of money and energy she had to making this place work she called her brother Tony down from Italy and her sister Antonia they take turns opening and closing the restaurant my cousins and I have to work there after school and on weekends"_

" _Sounds horrible working I mean"_

" _Liam really?"_

" _What it does Robbie"_

" _Liam w_ _orking gives you purpose it gives you structure makes you appreciate what you have"_ Liam rolled his eyes

" _Can you image working with mum and dad that closely everyday or uncle Cyrus?"_

" _I don't have to man I do it but I can't see Uncle Cyrus serving pizza to people"_

That image made me laugh.

" _Would you like a little extra sauce with that slice sir?" "Or Penelope or Maribel they'd probably drop endless trays on people"_ We started laughing

" _Working with family isn't easy that's for sure I can barely stand mine my aunt hates_ _E_ _ngland she wants to be back in Italy she's always bitching and pissing on about how horrible everything is over here, my cousins are brats my uncle is a prick"_

We talked so much I didn't see us pull up to the studio but as soon as we did my nerves came back. Robbie took my hand leading us inside. Damian waved the instructor over he was young fit.

" _Hey Damian"_

" _Hey Dominic this is my friend Leni she needs lessons can we get her in?"_

" _Sure lets get her dressed_ _h_ _ey Lexi come over here"_

Dominic waved to a teenage girl who looked slightly older than Liam and I who was working with another girl kicking and throwing punches. They stopped when Dominic called bowed to each other jogging around the room to get to us I could see she was breathing slightly labored sweating yet she still took my breath away.

" _Lexi this Eleanor I'm sorry Leni I want you to show her around and help her warm up can you do that?"_

" _Yes Sir'"_

" _Leni Lexi here is one of our best students she's been taking lessons here since she was three years old she's_ _earned her black belt three years ago your in great hands with Lexi"_

" _I'll take care of her no worries Dominic"_

She motioned for me to follow her showing me

" _The first studio here which is where Kiernan and I were_ _along with the next two_ _are_ _the_ _sparing room_ _s_ _for kids who are_ _Brown, red belts to_ _black belts._ _Next two are for kids who are green-blue belts, Than we have five for orange and yellow belts"_

As she showed me around I saw each room were filled with kids and teens in white pants and tops.

" _Sparing means you face an opponent and fight it can anything from a practice match where your testing each others skills to a serious match where your fighting to win a competition right now these students are practicing using helmets_ _also known as homyum_ _to protect their heads, mouth guards, gloves,_ _padded torso protectors called_ _hogu,_ _feet, shins, groins, hands, and forearms protectors are also worn."_

" _Sounds dangerous is it safe to even do this?"_

Lexi laughed great did I sound stupid? I thought it was a reasonable question but maybe it wasn't I felt my face flush. She didn't laugh though she just smiled I couldn't help but think how pretty she is when she smiles it was a quick smile yet it lite up her green eyes which seemed to glow, the light brought out the glitter of her light brown hair which had streaks of blue, green and orange through out her hair currently tied up in a high ponytail only a few curls falling down.

" _It's scary when you first start you don't have to be nervous though were not wolves here we won't throw you in with a black belt and expect you to instantly know what to do you'll be given a partner to help you the instructors will work with you, it's not without risks but than neither is life right?"_

" _True you have to risk to gain"_

" _Over here"_

She pointed to the main room I saw when I came in where a class with younger kids was just finishing up.

" _Thi_ _s_ _is_ _where we all warm up_ , _do some stretching, linework, padwork, strength exercises, patterns, 3step, 2step and 1step sparring and some free sparring"_

She spotted off so much I couldn't keep it all straight

" _Upstairs we have twenty more rooms for private lessons adult lessons, here are the locker rooms lets get you a gis which is a uniform"_

She pulled out a white top which kind of reminded me of a straight jacket from a plastic bag which she opened for me than a pair of white pants pointing to a locker

" _Bring your own lock it's pretty safe here but you never know I'll give you some privacy"_

I still felt uneasy changing in front of anyone but she kept her word and turned around while I took off my clothes shivering the gis was stiff and smelled of moth balls "

 _Can I keep my shirt on?"_

" _Sure babe as long as it's not to baggy"_

Even with a shirt on the gis was pretty baggy the material scratched my skin but I slipped on the given black shoes sucking it up.

" _I'm ready I guess"_

Turning around she smiled and laughed did I look as ridicules? Coming over she swung a white belt which she gently threw stiffening up. I braced myself why was she hitting me? She was suppose to help me learn to protect myself. I braced myself but the belt looped around my waist catching the other side she used it to pull me close what the heck was she doing? Why did I feel myself shaking? Tying the belt around me she was so close to me I could smell the sweat mixed with perfume.

" _You look like a baby bunny caught in a forest relax it won't be that bad I won't hurt you unless you like it rough?"_

" _Huh?"_ Was she for real? I felt my whole body tense up hearing her laugh made me even more red but it also started to relax me inside.

Once we went back out I saw Liam was also dressed in a gis hurrying over to him I questioned him his reply was so sweet. " _If someone goes after my sister they go after me so I might as well learn to defend myself were twins were in this together"_

Throwing my arms around him I smiled " _Thank you Liam"_ The sound of a deep male voice yelling out

" _Charyut_ _for the new students that means attention"_ I watched as all the students formed in two lines Liam and I followed suit standing in the back row next to each other while Dominic scanned the lines.

" _Nate back left Eleanor front right"_ What?

Why was he separating Liam and I? I felt my chest start to rise panicking don't cry keep it cool. I followed what he said finding myself standing by Lexi who smiled at me. I still felt scared my whole body was icy cold and I could barely swallow.

" _To all my students welcome this is beginners_ _t_ _aekwondo_ _we meet here everyday from five to seven. I am Master Dominic my assistances are my top students. I want everyone to say hello to Lexi Williamson"_

She waved out turning around to bow " _Kiernan De'lvangelia"_ A built teenage girl around 16 or so smiled from three people down from me, she was short pudgy with bright green eyes with tan skin a very serious expression on her face. _"_ _Michael Briminton"_ A teenage boy around 14 or 15 standing in the back row five kids away from Liam threw his hand up bowing to us.

" _T_ _hey are_ _all_ _black belts here and have been with me since they were three years old you will listen to them respect them and obey them as you will me" "_ _Upon entering the doju you will take off your shoes and put on the required kickers you will bow to the older students as well as the instructors when you come in after changing warm up once we start I will call you by name to line up you will answer me by yelling out yes sir' lets start now go to the back of the room wait for your name to be called and hurry we do not have time for laziness here"_

We did as we were told running to the back he started calling out names I saw Kiernan, Mike and Lexi standing up front with him. " _Callie" "Yes Sir" "Andrew" "Yes Sir'" "Jude" "Yes Sir" "Connor" "Yes Sir" "Unity" "Yes Sir" "Eleanor" "Yes sir'"_ I ran up front bowing as I stood by Unity? I almost chocked out happy seeing Unity standing by me how did I not see her earlier? Pay attention Leni

" _Karma" "Yes Sir" "Shane" "Yes Sir" "Harrison" "Yes Sir" "_ _Liam_ _" "Yes Sir" "_ _Carma" "Yes Sir'" A_ _s you can see there are only ten students here a small class therefor you can and will receive the top most personal training now hands by your side feet spread apart at least three inches you should remain at least five to six inches away from each person next to you when you are given a command you answer with a what?"_

" _Yes Sir"_

" _Correct" Now everyone face front and bow"_

" _Yes Sir"_

" _Now I will do this once and only once unless I am given a reason to so so again I want everyone to put their left hand over their heart raise their right hand and repeat after me. I promise not to use Martial arts on my friends family or teachers only those who are trying to hurt me"_ We repeated what he said ending with a yes Sir"

" _Now we are going to say the tenats of Martial arts_ _e_ _veryone say_ _after me_ _courtesy" "courtesy", "integrity", "integrity", "perseverance" "perseverance" "self control_ _"_ _"self control" "courage""courage""honor" "honor" "community" "community" "_ _Now bow" "Good_ _j_ _ob everyone now put your feet really wide bend those knees so your in a_ _sitting_ _stance_ _this is called getting into base._ _R_ _ight hand on your hip holding your belt left hand out front fists closed thumb on top of your other fingers._ _E_ _very time I yell one I want you to punch with your arm that's on your belt pull your other hand back make some noise while punching Hi-Yah lets try it one!" "Hi-yah"_

We punched out " _two" Three" Four" "_ _W_ _here dose the power of the punch come from Liam?" "_ _T_ _he arm Sir"_

" _Oh so close but no Eleanor?"_

" _The whole body sir'"_

" _Excellent and why is that?"_

" _Cause if you don't align the punch you can't hit your target properly and you can injury yourself Sir"_

" _Correct so your hips need to move with you like your dancing try it again"_

" _Hi-yah"_

Taking deep breaths in letting them out I felt my whole body start to relax as I imagined punching those girls square in their faces. He had us turn around and punch in the back than to each side back to the back than the front my whole body was being worked out the muscles in my shoulders and arms were screaming. I had no time to think though I had to stay focused on what he was yelling he started going faster

" _Now drop to the floor when I yell jump up into a sitting stance and punch"_

We dropped down than sprung up repeating this ten times faster each time than we did some more exercises. I watched as Lexi, Mike and Kiernan break into partners to demonstrate Lexi was with Dominic

" _Now if we were to be attacked we need to learn how to get away from a bad guy so Lexi grab me"_

She grabbed his hand "W _hat do we call getting down low?" "Getting into base Sir" "Correct" "Why do we do this?" "Unity?" "It makes it harder for someone to pull you away Sir" "Great answer"_

They demonstrated Lexi trying to pull Dominic, Mike trying to pull Kiernan but not succeeding. " _Now everyone get into base and don't let the bad guy pull you"_ All four of them came into the two lines trying to pull us I felt Lexi's fingers close around my wrist which were suddenly shaking. I have no clue why up until now I was feeling confident steady but now I felt slightly sick scared unsure.

She was all business pulling me making me off center I fell flat on my face color creeping up. " _Eleanor what happened?" "I- I don't know Sir I'm sorry" "Don't be sorry lets figure out what went wrong Lexi work with her" "Yes Sir"_ She bowed to him going behind me placing her hands on my hips " _Relax deep breath_ _bend those knees lock them don't allow me to pull you"_ She pulled at me again this time I closed my eyes blocking her from my view " _Good Job"_

Next he showed us the wrist escape how to spin to get away Lexi grabbing my hand but I was focused now getting low and spinning so she couldn't hold me or at least I thought I was but one whiff of her scent caught me by surprise. I stumbled falling into her chest, instead of getting mad she laughed " _For a dancer your balance sucks"_

" _How did you know I'm a dancer?"_ She smiled " _We all have secrets Princess" "Lexi take Eleanor and work with her in one of the private practice rooms" "Yes Sir"_

She took me five rooms down gave me some pads to protect my shins, face, mouth, helmets. She had me stand seven inches apart gave me two padded plastic things to hold up.

" _I'm going to kick at you punch at you I want you to block me you have to stay still don't allow me to push you down I'll start slow and build up speed okay?"_

I wasn't okay not by a long shot but I let out a breath nodding even though I was shaking inside. I didn't want to look like a fool in front of her. I don't know why but she had some sort of an effect on me. I braced myself but her kick was so powerful. I felt my knees buckle as I fell back crying out she raced over to me pulling me up " _Shake it off babe try again"_

Babe I liked hearing her call me babe why though was the question. We practiced over and over I started to finally get it stiffening my legs keeping my eyes out on her figuring out what her next move was moving in time with her. After twenty minutes we switched me attacking her with each punch each kick I let out a powerful yell feeling everything pour out. " _Excellent job you did it now shake it out yell jump up and down tell me how it feels!"_

She grabbed my hands shaking my body. I started laughing like crazy it felt amazing suddenly she jumped at me hugging me, I felt her whole body pressed against mine. _"Lets do it again!"_ I couldn't help but stare at her she moved so fluidly like a dancer putting on some music she grabbed a punching bag holding it

" _Keep one leg firmly planted on the ground use the other to kick as hard as you can when punching both feet planted in a sitting stance"_

The way her lips moved as she spoke fascinated me they twisted in a kind of sexy way her breath smelled like strawberries. Her eyes twinkled with every word she said there was no lack of enthusiasm on her hard to believe she was a teenager she had amazing biceps she was toned yet thin probably only weighing around 110 her calf's were thick every move held such power, precision, grace. Her brows were super thin her left one had a rainbow ring through it each ear had five piercings in them. Why was I staring so much? It's weird isn't it?

I hope she didn't see me staring. Would she think I was a freak? Why couldn't I stop staring? Why were these feelings going through me? Tiny little butterflies through out my stomach veins which came when she hugged me. I let out a deep breath jumping up and down trying to focus on the music. The singer was a popular teen female who everyone loved when she was 12 and staring on Disney now she was growing up and everyone was talking crazy about her cause she was trying to appear more grownup not letting any boundaries stop her. I kind of liked her Miley is unique and original. I tried pushing away the confused feelings away I never felt this way when any other girls hugged me why was I now? True I had no female friends expect maybe Gemma who didn't usually hug me but when she did I never felt like this. Did all girls feel like this? Was it normal?

" _Eleanor stay focused I know it's exciting to nail one things but there's so much more to learn"_

" _Yes Ma'Am_ _s_ _orry but please call me Leni"_

" _Cool call me Lexi you don't need to say Ma'am don't forget to yell as you kick or punch"_

" _Thanks_ _hi-yah!" "So what got you into martial arts?"_

" _Mum thought it would help me I was a pretty hyper kid always running around never focusing on just one thing she figured it would give me focus help my attention span and help me defend myself. I was picked on pretty badly on the playground other girls didn't like my long hair or my pretty clothes"_

" _I_ _bet no one picks on you now thou"_

" _Nope_ _but it's not because I'm some scary monster who they think will beat the crap out of them it's cuz_ _they know better it gave me confidence to stand up for myself"_

" _Hi-yah!"_ I spun as I kicked the bag " _How come your here now?"_

" _Same reason kids think they can say or do anything to me but I don't want my mum getting involved so my brothers thought this was a good way"_

" _Why don't you want your mum to know parents can be a big help"_

" _Not my mum she'll just muck it all up"_

" _You never know unless you try to talk to her Len"_

" _Maybe but I doubt it"_

" _I still want to learn to defend myself it never stops no matter where I go kids think they know me they think they can say anything about me my family. I want to be able to defend myself I'm sick of being weak"_

" _Just remember Leni it's not you that is the problem kids pick on others because there's an insecurity in themselves their afraid to face they make assumptions based on what little information they know if the tabloids report you dropped two million on Disney to close for a private party they assume it's real which leads them to assume you get what you want by using money hence your admission to Herefordshire International was all based on money they don't think beyond the tabs to see a bigger picture a whole person with feelings, talents, desires, passions so you have to be a bigger person understand that if your not perfect neither are they if you can't convince them dismiss them"_

Her words struck a cord with me Convince or Dismiss okay so I had to prove I was worthy of my place there if they didn't get it than it wasn't my problem it was theirs. I just had to find inner strength to know I was where I was for a reason. Bowing to her I went to change as we prepared to leave I shock her hand was it strange I longed for another hug?

" _Great job today Leni I look forward to working with you tomorrow remember your amazing as you are don't let anyone bring you down and try talking if you need anyone else_ _I'm always available wan_ _t_ _to exchange numbers?"_

I looked to Robbie was it okay to do that he smiled coming over to me wrapping his arm over my shoulders.

" _That's fine Leni we could have Lexi over some night maybe you can work on some training outside of class will tell mum your taking lessons because your teacher thinks it will help you with balance and discipline thanks for taking the time to help my little sister it won't be forgotten"_

He kissed her hand her eyes went wide as she giggled a bit why do girls always do that? Giggle when a prince kisses their hands? Sighing I turned jumping on Liam's back as he hit on a girl his yelp made me feel better laughing as the girl ran off scared.

" _Leni!"_

" _That was the best reaction yet Liam better than the last two girls you asked out"_

" _Yea that you sabotaged!"_

" _Kids stop it go to the car"_ Robert sighed as he said goodnight to Lexi who was giggling looking at me

" _I did the same thing to my twin brother to"_

Wait she was twin to cool small world huh? Why did I blush as I saw her watching me? What was with me lately? I had no time to think because Liam put me in a headlock " _Your going down twin your going down hard"_ We started wrestling as we headed out to the car turning I saw Lexi still watching me. Why was she watching me? 


	17. Chapter 17

**Len p o v**

" _Mum I want to do something special for Damian tomorrow is his birthday"_

" _That's sweet dear what would do you have in mind?"_

I sighed pushing the salad around on my plate as the servants changed out dishes. Poking at the fish I shrugged

" _I don't really have any ideas"_

" _Of course not because kids are incapable of thoughts they should be locked away in the towers unseen, unheard"_

I glared at our uncle Cyrus.

" _It's just that I don't know him well and I'm not exactly a boy so I don't know what boys like to do"_

" _Liam darling"_

" _Yes Mum do you know anything about this young man who's courting your sister?"_

" _Mum he's not courting me kids don't do that anymore he's a friend"_

" _A friend dear if that's what you kids are calling it now a days"_

" _Yes mum that is what we are calling it cause that is what it is"_

" _No Mum I barely knew he was on my team"_

" _That's cause boys are clueless"_

" _Better than being a prissy girl"_

" _Hey I'm not prissy!"_

I sneered at uncle Cyrus as Liam chimed in

" _I'm not clueless either! I can't help it if there's_ _just_ _to_ _o many pretty girls cheering for me it keeps my eyes focused on other things besides my team mates or the game"_

" _Son while I'm glad you have a great social life it's never cool to be so focused on one thing you lose focus on the other wonderful things in your life like school, your studies_ _spending time with your brother,_ _your sister._ _B_ _eing a part of a team is very beneficial to your later skills in life you learn the value of hard work, team play corporations_ _taking responsibility for actions_ _it can teach you confidence, accountability_ _but no one wins a game alone remember who your team mates are because one day you will need them to save your back."  
_

" _I don't want your homework to suffer because your eyes keep wandering"_

" _They won't Sir'"_

" _If you don't have your team mates back what kind of leader will you make? How will the people_ _trust you to run a whole kingdom if you can't even handle a football game?"_

" _They won't Sir' but I'm not in line for the throne dad Robert is next"_

" _Yes Liam I am but if something ever happens to me you and Leni are next in line you are ahead of her by four minutes Liam if I die you become the next king of England"_

I watched as my brother's face played out his emotions from disbelief to confusion to fear.

" _Nothing is going to happen to you Robbie your only sixteen"_

" _Bad things happen to kids all the time Liam people are always after us because of who we are were not exempt from death Liam, Leni I want you to hear me and understand this is a great responsibility that has been handed to us it's up to us to keep this monarchy alive you need to keep your guards up at all time that's why I took you to martial arts today. I want you to be able to defend yourself if someone gets past security you need to be aware"_

My heart was pounding even harder than I could imagine why was Robbie talking like this?

" _You need to listen to Mum and dad they know what their talking about they are fair and wise rulers they know what the people want need they know how parliament works pay attention in school stay focused some day this maybe yours"_

" _Liam you must know something about this young man he seemed nice he's being great to our sister we should pay it kind in return it would mean a great deal to Leni to help him out so think do you ever see him hanging with anyone from the team?"_

" _No he's kind of a loner I mean he gets along with the other lads but wait there's a girl that he always hangs with she's not on the team though"_

" _Do you know her name?"_

" _Leni eat your food stop playing with it the fish won't bite you bite it"_

Liam had no issue eating he was currently shoving food in his hole sighing I couldn't bring myself to eat it. I was really distrusted by Robbie talking.

" _Did something happen Robbie? Why are you thinking about death?"_

" _Leni I'm not thinking about death but I am being realistic"_

I saw him exchange looks with mum and dad quickly which made my heart pound harder even Cyrus looked away from me and Liam who didn't notice anything he was too busy easting.

" _What's her name Liam?"_

Robbie changed the subject

" _Laura, Lana, I don't know it's an L though I know that"_

Dad jumped in with so much Augusto I almost got whip lash looking up _"Are there any blokes that may know Liam?" "I'm sure there's got to be a few let me call some"_

" _You do that son right now so your sister and I can talk to Rachael we have little notice so we have to act fast and Rachael has many other things she needs to do"_

" _Okay Mum I'll call now may I be excused?"_

" _Yes son make sure your homework is done as well than I want you in bed"_

" _Eleanor if your not going to eat go upstairs take a shower change and get your homework done Rachael will be up to help as soon as we can get a hold of this girl no snacks tonight since you didn't eat"_

" _Yes mum"_

Laying on my bed I had so many different thoughts swirling through my head what did it all mean? I was so confused grabbing my journal I sighed starting to write.

 _ **Dear Envy**_

 ** _I am so confused I must admit to I am a bit scared today has been rough on so many levels._ _F_ _irst I was ruthlessly attacked by several girls in my school. I don't know what it is I did to make them hate me so much I have only ever tried to be myself, maybe that is it maybe being myself is just not good enough but how can I be anything but myself? I don't get it I honestly don't I didn't chose to be born into this family, who would?" People think everything is so easy when you have money but can I tell you a secret envy? I can right that's what this is for..okay here I go it's not so easy in fact it sometimes sucks! I know harsh words sorry I am usually more of a lady mum would be disappointed in me for using such strong language. I can't help it though I mean I don't wan_ _t_ _to sound whiny or ungrateful. I know I have a lot of luxuries, I'm not denying that part but what people don't understand is how lonely it feels to have so much money freedom but to never have any real friends._**

 ** _I never had any close friends girls are so jealous petty and mean I don't trust them, like today I go onto my face book, I see I have 100 new requests. I was so excited maybe someone saw I had real talent maybe someone wanted to be my friend._ _M_ _aybe they talked to all their friends so I accepted_ _a few_ _big mistake_ _as soon as I accepted they started leaving nasty rude remarks on my page no photo was left untouched they said mean things like "Ew that dress makes you look fat, get lipo suction you pig,_ _You're so self-obsessed!' And 'Ugly!'_ _"_ _Your self conceited spending two million on Disney do you know how many people can be fed with that money?" "One person told me to go off myself_ _he said I'm_ _worthless_ _I_ _don't deserve love_ _I_ _have no talent." I will never contribute anything to society"_ _H_ _ow do these people have the right to judge me? I didn't do anything to them, I am so afraid sometimes. I can't talk to Robbie not after he was so sweet to me he took me to self defense class today he was so proud of me for going out there and giving it my all._**

 ** _Here's another secret Envy I was so nervous even a bit scared but I sucked it up. I went in fears and all, it was so rewarding. I met a girl named Lexi she's really sweet and pretty. That's one of the things leaving me so confused_ _why am I having these feelings for this girl I just met today? What does it mean? Why am I looking at her so intently?_**

 _ **I kind of scared myself I mean it's not normal for a thirteen almost fourteen year old girl to be looking at another girl's chest right? I know it's not but damn it I couldn't help myself she has amazing booms [my secretly made up word for breasts I think it sounds better but don't tell anyone envy okay it's our secret].**_

 ** _I couldn't help but picture how they must look under that gis._ _I'm a freak! I am sick disgusting I need help but who can I go to? No one of course because no one would ever understand what this feels like mum and dad would banish me disown me. I mean no one in the monarch has ever been like this.. I have no real friends just this one boy Damian he's really nice but he's normal he would never get me or how awful this feels. I keep thinking maybe someday I will understand but I don't this isn't the first time it's happened._**

 _ **I've felt this way for awhile now, whenever a girl walks past. I can't keep my eyes off their bum or their booms. I watch the way they walk, how their lips move. I feel these tiny bumps on my arms as they touch me. I feel alive when they talk to me. In one way I hope my birthday comes soon Robbie says that as we get older we learn more about ourselves maybe he was once like this maybe he use to look at other lads and think immoral thoughts though I doubt it Robbie is perfect. I don't mean that he never makes mistakes he does he's human.**_

 _ **I just mean he does what mum and dad say to he seems to know so much about life. Maybe it's just a phrase all teens go through but if so why don't people talk about it it would make life so much easier. Maybe that's why life isn't suppose to be easy?**_

 ** _I don't know but if turning 14 will help me than hurry up it's the first year_ _I'll_ _ever want my birthday to roll around. I hate my birthday._ _It's so fake here no one cares that I am another year older why would they I am a freak a pig a sinner a loser. I wasn't even suppose to be born those girls were right. I am the spare to the spare_ _to_ _thee heir. I wasn't wanted I just came along. I couldn't even do that right yet people are forced to celebrate my day they come with fake smilies and laughter with presents that their assistances bought they wish me well but they don't care. I'm good at faking it though I have to be._**

 ** _I mean if you ask anyone I have it all a great family, money, looks I don't think I have anything special but everyone says I look like my mum, she's gorgeous so if I do than I guess I am good looking I think their lying_ _though_ _who's going to tell thee princess of England she's ugly? No one expect her peers they have nothing to lose. I should love my life right_ _yet I don't there's a part of me that is so sad. I can't even lift my head._**

 ** _I feel like I am living a lie like I some how impersonated someone else's life who's though?_ _I look perfect on the outside inside is the real me the dark cold black emptiness that is me. The one who hates everything most of all herself, I can't show her to the world because I am the daughter of King Simon the third, Of Helena Queen of England. I am living in their shadows and in the shadows of all my ancestors who came before me. I just want to go to sleep to dream life is beautiful in dreams in reality not so much._ _This emptiness is eating me from the inside out."_**


	18. Chapter 18

**Lavina**

" _I can't believe you scored a date with thee princess of England how the hell did you score that mate?_ _w_ _hat happened to the their never be my mates we have nothing in common?"_

Punching Damian's arm I watched as he squirmed

" _Well I guess I rushed to judgment before I knew them their really not all that bad, I mean Liam is a little dodgy he can't even remember were on the same team but Leni is really sweet she seems intimidated by her family so if I have to I guess I can endure two whole evenings on her arm I mean I don't know how I'll ever get through it the free food the music the attention being next to the prettiest girl in the whole UK, it all seems so hard"_

Damian was really dragging it out rolling my eyes. I hit him which made him throw his hands up begging me to stop but I didn't ducking he rolled on to his back trying to protect his face. After ten minutes of wrestling we were laughing so hard we had to stop.

" _You have to forgive Liam though D"_

" _I do why?"_

" _Cause he's pretty he doesn't have to be smart"_

" _Isn't that a double standard your the one who always bashes people for saying girls don't have to be smart as long as their pretty or sexy"_

" _Yea but that's because girls are always labeled as stupid but pretty we all know Liam is smart he has a_ _70% he's first in the class but he has dumb moments like all of us"_

" _Now back to you Damian nice try at changing the subject though what are you going to wear?"_

" _I don't know I'm assuming they take care of all that but maybe I should ask Liam I'd be too embarrassed to ask Leni"_

My phone went off as we talked looking at the screen I saw it was an unrecognized number "Excuse _me for a minute Damian this maybe the job I was applying for"_

" _Okay good luck"_

Getting up I jogged outside answering it on the final ring " _Hello?" "Hi is this Lavina?"_ The voice sounded somewhat familiar but I couldn't pinpoint it _"Yes who is this?" "This is Liam Henstridge do you know a Damian Grant?" "Yes…_

Wait hold up was the prince of England calling me? Thee prince oh my god I suddenly got so nervous taking a deep breath I collected myself. " _Yes D's my best mate why what's going on?" "My sister wants to plan a party for him tomorrow for his birthday but we need some help"_

" _Help with what?"_

" _Does he like small parties bigger ones? Any friends we can invite?" Anything you think he would like music tastes, favorite foods?" "I'll text you_ _Len's_ _number and you two can work out the details"_

" _Okay sure"_

" _Thanks Lavina see ya"_

Before I could respond there was a click and the line went dead. I was in shock Liam really just called me. Screaming I jumped up and down I just talked to the prince of england holy cow stuff! A few people gave me strange looks but who cares. Deep breath Lavina keep it calm I collected myself as I went inside to Damian who was in my room reading ok magazine as he bobbed his head to the music.

" _Any luck?"_

" _No but they thanked me for applying said I was too young yet"_

He nodded wow he believed that lie. " _The next question is how do you go to the party and the dinner without your mum finding out?" "You know she'll flip out"_

" _I know that's where my best friend comes in"_

" _Oh your best friend huh?"_

Damian grinned at me making a face like the cat that swallowed the mouse.

" _Oh who's she? She must be pretty special"_

" _Yes she's amazing, smart, funny, generous"_

" _Arse kisser what do you want me to do"_

Grabbing the pillow I smashed it across the back of his head screaming like a girl he covered his head ducking. Laughing I took full advantage of it jumping up smashing it over him he was quick to roll over almost falling off the bed but grabbing my stuffed leopard fancy as a hostage my eyes squinted as he wiggled it " _Watch it we wouldn't want to hurt_ _M_ _r. fancy smashy fluffiness would we?"_

My eyes squinted harder he thought he had me corned didn't he slowly I lowered my pillow jumping up he took it as victory " _No we wouldn't" "In your face!"_ Screaming I swung my pillow lower harder " _In your crown loser!" Girls win!"_ He groaned as the pillow smashed him in his lower anatomy. Shoving him off the bed I grabbed Fancy hugging her.


	19. Chapter 19

**Damian**

Lavina: _"Happy Birthday man 14 years old! Celebration Tonight!_

Troy: _Yo' man 4 ur b-day I thought I'd pay ya back for all the things you've ever done to me- wait I meant for me lmao beware I kept a list Happy Birthday dude!"_

Romar _: Can you believe we've known each other 10 years? Yea me either happy birthday you old sod you"_

That's how I woke up to my cell blaring not a bad way to start the day I guess hope the rest of the day goes as smoothly. Got downstairs with ten minutes to spare

" _Your late so much for I have dedication little Mr I have talent I have drive where's all that drive three days later?"_

" _It's still here Mum"_

She rolled her eyes pointing to the cabinet _"Cereal's there were out of milk"_

Of course we are grabbing my bag. I didn't even bother to groan it would just get me scolded " _No time for food gotta go"_ Did she even remember it was my birthday? Probably not she never acknowledge it running to the metro stop of course it was raining welcome to London. She never showed any concern for me for what I wanted took pleasure in. I don't ever recall getting a present not for my birthday or Christmas. Everything I have is because I have been scoring odd jobs since I was a kid working for Mr. Taylor in his hardware store doing small jobs in which he would pay me 2.50 pounds. Working for Mrs. Daniels in her music store when I was seven or eight helping stocking instruments, cleaning she gave me lessons in exchange and old instruments that were broken or too old to be used I would fix them up make them work like new.

Fridays I worked in the fish market helping the fishermen to bring in their catches clean them up serve them it's smelly hard work but me and the other lads earn tips from each of the fishermen plus Mr. Wilkinson the head of the market is a pretty fair dude he pays us 4.54 GBP.

" _Happy Birthday mate!"_ I smiled at Brielle who is a year eleven at Aylestone Business and Enterprise College. Cars were speeding by me spraying me with more water gross whipping my face I shock my hair. How did people I barely knew know it was my birthday and wish me well when my own mum didn't even bother to? I wonder if my dad was around if he would care? Where was my dad anyway? Why did he care so little that he left without even a thought?

" _Yo mate happy bday!" I have a present for you!"_

I look over to see Darren a year ten grinning at me as pointed to a girl who was probably in year eight or nine walking by herself she was one of the special needs kids rolling my eyes I gave him the finger. That was cruel to single her out like that she couldn't help being different. Finally the metro rolled up jumping on I hurried to the back it was already packed. I left the few seats left for woman and older citizens. Loud and crowded I had no time to think or move so I just held on with one hand while I slipped on my ipod with my free hand.

Twenty minutes later I was finally walking the last stretch of my journey along with a dozen or so other students, the rain wasn't letting up so I was soaked by the time I got to school. Leni was standing by the lockers with Liam, Gemma, Roger her smile warmed me up instantly.

" _Aw man your all wet mate"_

" _Yea nice observation sherlock"_

" _Aw shut your mouth Roger I don't see you offering a hand"_

Leni grabbed one of Liam's extra jackets from his locker handing it to me, smiling I took off my soaked one changing. " _No worries mate I'm sure Miss. Janelle will let me use the school dryer to dry it up for you she likes me"_ Miss Janelle is in charge of all the student uniforms school linens she also teaches Math. Lending me her locker since I had no time left to get to mine using her mirror fixing my hair. I felt her watching me did she regret asking me to go did she think I was foolish stupid for being late on the third day of school? " _Relax Damian it's okay we all have late days hey can you come with me after school?" "Where to?" "I'm meeting my Mum's Assistant Rachael she's going to help you pick out something to wear for tomorrow and Saturday and explain to you what is expected"_

Some of my fears melted away as I smiled at her thank god now I didn't have to ask Liam but some new fears came creeping up. This was a really big deal what if I screwed it up what if here family didn't like me? I mean her family held power didn't they? Leni reached down grabbing my hand pulling her close. I smelled her newest perfume which drove me crazy I loved how she smelled. Did I look like a total nut job staring at her? She was looking at me strangely but I couldn't help it I mean she's gorgeous tall with amazing smooth skin stunning green eyes her hair was silky she has the perfect body thin but curvy her breasts are amazing.

I couldn't help but stare feeling things I have never felt before. I could feel my heart beating faster as she leaned closer to me. " _Thanks for doing this Damian I really appreciate it" "Yea um you said so yesterday"_ I was nervous and trying to make small talk but I think I made her feel stupid cause she looked down blushing. Damn it Damian think before you speak looking away she was at a lost for words. Think fast Damian my mind was racing with so many thoughts but I didn't know what to say.

The bell sounded I was about to lose that moment. " _Did you see Britney's newest video?"_ I held my breath was it a stupid question? I knew she liked Britney I saw it on her Q&A from the first day of school "What musical artist inspire you?" Did she just put down anybody?

" _Of course I saw it uh amazing Britney is so so talented she gets such a bad rap but she's just a girl trying to figure out who the hell she is in a world that is not normal, she has so much pressure on her to be this perfect person to never make mistakes_ _it's unreal no one can be perfect all the time"_

She looked so sad damn it now I made her sad I was on quite a roll here, panicking I tried to think of something to say her voice seemed so depressed.

" _They call her so many viscous names they forget she was just a normal teen girl who got famous at such a young age she was thrown into this world without really having the experience to know how to handle it, I guess I was lucky in that regard I won't go crazy cause I don't have that excuse I was born and breed for this. I don't like it but I mean, Sorry I sound like I'm whining"_

" _No Leni you don't no one can know what it feels like if their not in it" "I want to know what your feeling Leni that's the only way we can get to know each other is to open up to be honest with each other I don't assume your life is easy. I don't know what's it like what fame is really like"_

" _It's like a dream I guess I mean it's the only life I have ever known so I can't compare it_ _t_ _o anything else_ _but i_ _t_ _feels like being held against your will no matter what I wear it's wrong if I try to dress like a normal teen I'm a slut if I dress down I'm depressed if I hide my face because I'm shy or not feeling well I'm a snob. I'm ungrateful for everything I have if I pose I'm trying to hard to be someone I am not I can't ever just be me and the thing is"_

We stopped as she licked her lips turning to me she held my hand tighter moving closer to her I let out a shaky breath " _I'm still trying to figure things out I'm only thirteen I don't know who I am what my dreams are what I am even allowed to dream to be"_

" _What do you mean?"_

" _I mean I am Thee princess of England my life is not my own my dreams are not my own everything I am is owned by the crown the throne my whole life is mapped out for me and I don't know if I can deal with that I want my own life but if I go after what I want I will lose everything, I can't lose my family they are my life" "I want to be able to sing to write my own songs, to have people know me as someone who's famous for her talent not because she's a sovereign I know I'm bitching again but..."_

" _You have every right to feel that way Leni you deserve to be known for your talent"_

" _I_ _t doesn't matter though Damian cause I'll never measure up to my mum she's gorgeous she's smart"_

" _S_ _o are you Leni in your own way you can't try to live up to someone else shadow you have to make your own shadow cast your own light you are beautiful Leni"_

I left her speechless that was a start now we were so close our bodies were almost as one. Holding her hand I pulled it up to my chest, I could hear her swallow. Nervously my breath came out in sharp jagged huffs her voice was small doubtful.

" _You think I am beautiful? No one our age has ever told me that I thought I was ugly and a freak and.._

" _No Leni your amazing don't ever think those things about yourself"_

Pulling her to me I ran my fingers over her check bones which were amazing strong feeling myself shiver. I didn't allow any doubts fears to take over. I just leaned up and kissed her right on her lips that's when it happened every teenage boy's worst fear.

Their body reacting at the worst moment possible I could feel it happening down there but there was nothing I could do about it, her scent was driving me insane. I closed my eyes feeling her lips so soft so wet so amazing pressed against mine, I willed it to go away trying to think of anything at all not related to how amazing Leni isbut nothing worked she pulled me closer. So now I was pressed right up against her skirt feeling her amazing body making the problem even stiffer and harder to control. I felt her trying not to giggle as she pressed herself closer not breaking the kiss. Was she laughing at me was she grossed out was she uncomfortable? God I hate puberty.


	20. Chapter 20

**Damian**

We didn't speak about what happened but she didn't pull away she held my hand the whole day it may have been more for her benefit at times. She had a rough go in dance being shoved by several older girls which somehow our teacher never seemed to notice. She was scared about the audition coming up after school for the elite repertory dance team. While we were at lunch I took the time to pull her in my lap she was so scared she wasn't even eating, I could feel her body shaking. Running my hands along her arms. I tried to calm her racing heart down kissing her neck gently sucking on it. I saw the girls watching her. Making her shaking even worse

" _Don't look at them Leni their nothing you have talent you can make this team your the number one dancer in the UK you have every right to be here"_

" _Listen to D man he's right girl I watched the video on youtube from last years dance magic comp girl you killed it!_

I smiled at Unity who was sitting with us in the yard sharing wings with Kit " _Leni you slayed that competition I saw the way you checked that girl from Ireland no one stood a chance with you there I mean your skills are unseen before"_

She seemed to relax leaning her head back against my shoulder. She looked so small so vulnerable her eyes though are so beautiful. I made a promise to myself to protect her from harm. Leaning down I scanned the area no teachers in close range so I planted a kiss on her lips quickly a few kids saw us and started oohing but before any teachers could see us I was sitting back up again.

" _Leni do you want some help preparing for the audition today?"_ She looked to Kit shocked nodding " _We can get some space now if you want to practice"_

" _Okay sure Damian do you mind at all?"_

" _No course not baby go on be brilliant"_

Kit helped her up I could see the three girls looking at them laughing thankfully Kit lead her away from them. " _Who are those girls?" "You mean Courtney, Kendra and Holly? The blond giggling demons" "Yea who do they think they are?" "They think their the head bitches Courtney's dad contributes_ _£32998.47_ _each year to the school so she pretty much has free range to do whatever she wants she never gets in trouble at all"_

" _Yea well she messed with the wrong girl this time I'll make sure she pays for what she's doing to Leni but I will need some help do you want to help bring down the school bitch?"_ Unity slapped my hand nodding at me.

After school I stood next to Leni as we waited for her turn I could feel her shaking again even though she was warmed up and felt more confident than earlier. Leaning her head back against my chest I let my eyes take in her body god she is amazing. Wrapping my arms over her stomach I watched the other dancers who were pretty spot on everyone seemed to have a pretty amazing routine even those who messed up recovered quickly with the exemption of a few who were cut right away.

" _Damn we have so much homework already I don't if I can handle all this D"_

" _You'll be fine baby I will help you"_

She was right though it was only the third day of school and already we had a group assignment from our acting class to search youtube find artist that aren't famous who are just normal teens but who have success on their channels who we can relate to who we look up to. Than we have to create a youtube channel ourselves mixing all our ideas into one. We have a book assignment from English to read the first two chapters by Friday. We have to discuss the book with our families get their views on it and how it effects us than write an essay. The essay is due Monday. Plus three chapters of history, a math worksheet each day. Not to mention our assignments from dance, music. Leni was thinking I could tell by how her face changed with each thought from worry to nerves to fear to hope. Kissing her neck I saw Liam watching us both what was he thinking?

When it was her turn she took a deep breath turning to me taking off her sweater she handed it to me as she leaned down to me kissing her I wished her luck. Her lips tasted amazing like strawberries and cream. I loved it kissing her three more times quickly before pushing her out there. " _You can do this Leni!"_ Her music started as she looked straight ahead taking her position.

" _Surprise!"_

I stumbled back in shock as we walked into Queen's Quarter which is a normal teen hangout in West London. Leni's audition had been stressful for all of us but I knew she would slay it and she slayed it winning a spot on the team along with Kit. Looking around I was shocked Lavina, Romar, Drake Carter all my mates from home were there along with like ten kids from our school. Liam, Gemma, Heather, America, Kit, Olivia, Bliss, Connor, Unity, Destiny, Cody.

The club was closed for a private event. Now I see the event was me overwhelmed I tried to take it all in Birthday banners hung all over the room. "Happy Birthday Damian" "14 Not Forever" "Happy 14th Damian" Music was blasting from a DJ spinning brilliant colorful lights created little spotlights all over the rooms. This place is impressive I have never been here but I hear it's amazing and they weren't lying two levels the bottom was a dance floor that had a stage.

The top was a restaurant with a bar which had it's own doors to block out the downstairs but also held a balcony that could overlook it all tables were scattered all over both the balcony and restaurant. I couldn't believe they did this all for me. Leni pulled me into the top floor. Leading me over to a booth where Liam, Gemma, Lavina, Romar, Ashok, Unity, Robert and Kit were all sitting. Pulling her close to me I held her

" _Thank you for this Leni"_

Leaning in I felt her lips touching mine " _Eleanor Alexandra Henstridge!"_ Robert yelled out pounding on the table. Quickly I pulled away my face flushing up as she jumped away from me her face the color of burgundy, her hands shaking. Oh god I hope I didn't get her in trouble.


	21. Chapter 21

**Leni**

Robbie's sharp voice sent waves of terror shooting down my throat up my spine pulling away from Damian. I glared at Robbie who glared right back.

" _Leni that is not how we behave in public we have an image to uphold respectful, courteous, regal not slutty, your young adults Eleanor you know the rules you know why we follow these rules but since you seem to have forgotten I shall remind you of our class._

 _The Royal_ _family_ _represents_ _England_ _,_ _we are_ _the top preserver of_ _our_ _country's good deeds, history_ _we are_ _idolized by many people around the world. If_ _we_ _didn't_ _behave_ _we_ _are dirtying_ _our_ _country's name and deeds specially_ _our_ _family and_ _ourselves_ _."_

" _Damian if you are going to be with my sister you need to be a proper gentleman you ask to hold her hand you kiss her check and only her check you hold the door for my sister you address her by her royal highness_ _she is not to date alone she is to date in groups no less than six or seven, we are to know where you are going how long you will be there, who you will be with, what you are doing, cell phones are on at all time when we call you answer, remember you are always being watched by us by the paparazzi you will be judged by everyone but at the end of the day it's Leni's name on the line so you will respect her our family our rules. Do you understand me?"_

I was beyond shaking with anger who did Robbie think he was? Damian seemed to handle it better than I did he simply nodded at my brother but I wouldn't give him an answer I jumped up stomping off

" _Eleanor get back here!"_

Screw Robert who the heck did he think he was? He wasn't my father nor was he my mum he was only my brother. I get he worries I understand he feels pressure to live up to our family legend but he had no right to do that to me or to Damian! Going over to the bar bowing my head

" _What can I get for you your Royal Highness?"_

Slowly I let out a breath looking up shocked seeing those eyes staring at me they went right through me leaving me speechless _"Lexi?"_ _"_ _Yes Princess that's my name"_

She smiled a smile so radiant it could make the sun jealous without me having to say it she poured me a pino noir. I never drank wine before so I was a bit nervous she smiled " _Just relax close your eyes and let the flavor rush your mouth I promise you'll feel better"_

I did as she said slowly sipping the drink closing my eyes letting out my breath as the strawberries mixed with the cherries and blueberries over ride my taste buds my checks tingled my tongue shock with pleasure. I felt her take my hand a chill went through my body as I opened my eyes.

I saw we were outside she smiled wrapping her arm over my shoulder as we went around back taking my hand she led me inside a back room. She held me steady as we went up three flights of steps. Where were we going? The lighting was dim so I couldn't see going down a hall she stopped outside a door using a key to open she allowed me inside first smiling.

" _Welcome to my humble_ _quarters Your Majesty"_

" _Your royal highness is fine my mum is her majesty"_

" _Sorry I'm not use to this whole royal family"_

" _It's fine you can call me Leni I prefer it"_

" _Than Leni it is"_

Her apartment was adorable small with only four rooms the main room was all white with a floral design in the couch recliner and rugs, modest 12 inch TV family photo's lined the walls the kitchen was only a half kitchen with a stove, microwave, fridge/ freezer a table shoved in the corner two small windows which had the curtains drawn. The master bedroom had it's doors closed than there were two smaller rooms that was empty but obliviously belonged to boys.

" _I apologize formally in advance my brothers are typical lads and by typical I mean pigs"_

I couldn't help but laugh as I sipped my drink shocked to find it was almost empty.

" _I know that feeling I have two both older man are they ever disgusting they are so lucky they have a full staff that cleans their rooms for them"_

" _So wait your brothers never have to clean their own messes up?"_

I was probably blushing but I was feeling so warm now. I didn't know if it was the wine the blanket she had wrapped around me or the question her tone wasn't accusing but it did have a disbelieving tone to it. Did I speak to freely? Well I opened the gate I might as well go through it there was nothing to be ashamed about even though my life wasn't normal it was my life. I couldn't lie and why should I either she would accept me or she wouldn't if she didn't I didn't need her in my life. Another swig the last I answered the same way I have heard my uncle say a million times

" _No they've never had to clean up anything were Royalty we don't clean up after ourselves we pay people to do that"_

Shockingly she laughed letting out a breath I didn't know I was holding I smiled back at her as she filled my glass back up.

" _It doesn't mean my brothers are slops or incapable of cleaning we just never had to"_

" _Aw man my brothers would love that!"_

" _I'm sure most kids would although Robbie would prefer to do it himself he is just a control freak!"_

" _He seems nice though Len"_

She opened the door to another room across the hall her room I assumed my breath caught as I entered while her brothers adjoining rooms were a deep blue with a once green carpet now covered in stains a bunk bed in one room ripped with covers thrown all over the place clothes all over even on the furniture. The other held a single equally as messy bed.

Hers was a tropical paradise sparkling cherry hardwood floors palm tress fake of course lining the room one wall was an ocean view another was a night sky the one behind her bed was a beach view with painted palm tress a beautiful sunrise. Her bed was a canopy of colors the sheets, pillow covers were black silk with a rainbow colored comforter pink, red, orange, yellow, green, turquoise, indigo, violet.

Her dressers held pictures all over them picking up one I saw it was her with her three brothers her arms around two of their shoulders while another was on bended knees in front of them. " _How old are your brothers?"_ She came up behind me her breath against my shoulder blade sending shivers down my neck why did I suddenly feel so cold? I saw my shirt had slide down my left arm but made no motion to move it even though I saw her eyes checking it out. " _Bruce here"_

She pointed to the boy on her left side with shoulder length brown hair a huge smile as he laughed. _Is 11 and Rennet is 14_ _and Dice is my twin_ _" "So is Rennet older or younger?"_ She smiled leaning closer why was she so close? Was this normal between girls? " _Is the princess curious about thy age?" "Yes thou is but thou does not need to talk in Renaissance tongue"_

She was so close to me now our breath were against each others check once again I had drinking every drop. " _Pray_ _me_ _pardon_ _t_ _hou_ _Maiden protests?" "Aye!"_ We both giggled like crazy she fell against me her check against mine. " _More wine fair maiden?"_ I nodded someone had to stop this crazy talk.

Reaching for my glass I felt the world spin swaying I grabbed for something to hold onto she was there in an instant. " _Maybe that's enough for now Len lets sit down"_ Sitting down sounded amazing but was easier thought of than done. She took my hands leading me slowly over as everything spun. As I fell onto her bed I saw the colors of her comforter on her ceiling in the shape of a flag why did they look like something I had seen before? She helped me to sit up my head resting against the pillows which felt amazing.

" _I'm older than Rennet I'm 16"_

Ah an older woman okay cool I felt the bed creak as she slide in next to me. " _Your accent isn't of a Londoner" "_ _No princess that's cause I am not from London I was born in Manchester my mum is from England my dad a New Yorker we traveled with thee Jorvik Viking Festival as well as thee Duke John's Festival (Hertug Hans Festival) up until two years ago my mum felt she was getting too old to do so much traveling plus she wanted us to have a normal up bringing we would miss school from December for rehearsals than for the faire itself which took place mid-January though mid-February we'd have two months in school before being pulled out in mid may for more rehearsal than June thee Duke John's started"_

I felt her fingers running through my hair normally I hated anyone touching my hair to me it was intimate. I had to spend so much time while my ladies in waiting did my hair I hated for it to be messed up but I didn't mind her touching it. For whatever reason she relaxed me made me feel safe. Turning over I smiled at her still feeling dizzy her fingers moved to my face. Shivers went through me

" _You still manged to earn your way to black belt" "Yea I had great teachers Dominic was awesome he trained me everyday after school the months I was in town for than faire time I was lucky each faire I had someone there who was also a black belt they worked with me before and after the faire and on weekdays non-faire days is it hot in here or is it me?" "It's you"_

I answered somewhat cheeky but also a bit serious suddenly I noticed her hair was darker reaching up. I sat up not a smart idea but I was intrigued now grabbing her hair I let it fall through my fingers. " _Your hair's darker!" "Yes you just saw that?"_ She laughed full on as I nodded which made my head spin harder grabbing me she held me up smiling as she slipped her shirt off why was she doing that? " _So you think I'm hot?"_ I was caught off guard did she think I was coming on? Was I?

I was so confused falling back onto the bed I closed my eyes suddenly I felt her on top of me what was she doing? Shivering as I felt my shirt being unbuttoned " _Relax let the wine soothe you I'm just_ _ma_ _king you more comfortable"_ I saw no reason for her to lie so I closed my eyes " _Your mum let you dye your hair?" "Yea she believes in letting kids express themselves creativity besides it's only black with purple highlights wouldn't your mum let you?"_

Her delicate hands were massaging my shoulders slow sensual why did it feel so different than all my other massages? Why did it feel so amazing? Why didn't I stop it? I don't know the answers to any of these questions but I didn't stop her even as she moved her hands down further over my back pulling my shirt all the way off removing my bra her fingers digging deep into my warm skin making the little hairs stand up in shivering goodness.

My breathing was deep as my skirt came off. I should stop her but I didn't I let her fingers work their way over my bare back deep in neck my body arched along with hers as each touch sent waves of pleasure through me. Every part of me shot up than fell back completely relaxed and exhausted she collapsed next to me smiling as she ran her fingers over my chest. What had just happened? Why was she grinning?

"I _had a hunch princess my gaydar is usually never wrong"_ What was a gaydar what was she talking about? I had no idea all I knew is I was feeling so peaceful I didn't want it to end. So I didn't ask. I just let her touch me all over as I lay there zoned out envying her freedom her creativity my eyes once again saw the rainbow colored flag as they wandered around the room landing on pictures of her with another girl around her age. She was shorter but curvier with porcelain skin wavy blond hair and blue eyes.

Their arms were wrapped around each other's shoulders. One frame had the words Khloe and Lexi 4 Eva around it the frame was heart shaped. She saw me staring at the picture " _My ex Girlfriend Khloe we worked better as friends than as…_

Than as what? My eyes went back to the flag that's when I made the connection. The same moment her lips pressed themselves against mine. She tasted like cherries and vanilla. Her moans brought me back to reality, I shot up pushing her back shocked who did she think she was? Why would she kiss me? More importantly though why did I like it?


	22. Chapter 22

**Damian**

The music pumped loudly as Lavina, Olivia, Unity, Kit, America, Cody, Liam, Gemma, Ashok. Roger and I all danced. " _I love the beat of this song!" "Yea the singer is dope man but he's not as good as you D" "Thanks Lavina"_

It was hard to talk over the music but we kept it simple as we moved our bodies dancing. " _I could only dream of being this good man!"_ Roger yelled out as Olivia giggled trying to get closer but Roger kept her at bay grinning as he watched her swing her hips. Where was Len? Why wasn't she dancing? She loved to dance my eyes scanned the room she had been missing for a while since her brother went off, I couldn't believe he did that to her. I tried chasing her but she left with Lexi I didn't know Lexi well but I knew she had a rep around Ledbury she better not hurt Len. Finally I spotted her coming in looking flustered her face red rushing over to her.

I motioned to Lavina who nodded dancing closer to Amercia and Olivia. Worry filled my body as I went to her taking her hand leading her outside for some air. She was trying to hide the fact that she was shaking but I could feel it. Helping her onto a ledge I held her hand sliding next to her.

" _Len are you alright? You look pale"_

" _No I'm fine I think the stress of this week is starting to catch up to me"_

" _Do you want to go home?"_

" _No you know what I want to dance will you dance with me?"_

" _Absolutely let's go your royal highness"_

I helped her down as she rolled her eyes " _Please stop calling me that I am not my brother all this proper shit it freaks me out I am just a normal girl I don't want special treatment"_

" _Sorry Len I don't want to offend you"_ Helping her down I caught her arms wrapped around her waist she smiled as I lead her inside.

Holding her close as the song changed to a slower paced one I felt her lean her head down on my shoulder she seemed so sad. What could I do to make her smile?

" _Thank you for all of this Len it's so sweet you didn't have to do this"_

I was trying to act natural but damn it's hard to do that when I am around her. Just smelling her perfume was driving me insane. What was it that I also smelled? Did she spray on another one? Earlier it was Caron's Poivre I know because Lavina told me she has always eyed it but one bottle costs 1,296.20 GBP. Now the scent was different I didn't know what it was but it was cheap and her breath was fruity has she been drinking? Maybe I was imagining it yeah man your paranoid let it go. Wrapping my arms tighter around her I thought of ways to make her laugh.

" _So Len I have a joke for you up for it?" "_

 _Sure hit me with it"_

She didn't sound very enthusiastic but I twirled her and went for it anyway.

" _Why did the little kid dance on the jar of jam?"_

" _I Don't know why?"_

" _Because the top said, "Twist to open."_

That earned a smile but no laughter okay keep going _"Why did the two knives go to the dance together?_ She shrugged as I dipped her god I wanted to kiss her but I saw Robert watching and Liam dancing closer so I kept my cool as I answered " _Because they both looked sharp!"_ _Oh come on a chuckle something that wasn't dull"_

Now I got a giggle " _Sharp, Dull you made another joke without even trying"_ Finally I saw her eyes light up with laughter figures she'd like knife jokes. _"What animals are poor dancers? Four-legged ones, because they have two left feet." "Okay stop stop!" "Okay I will but answer me this Len how many knives does it take to change a light bulb?"_ She groaned as we spun right slow but she guesses " _About 5?" "I don't know its just a stab in the dark" "Okay enough!"_ She was laughing so hard now I had to hold her up.

When it was time for cake everyone lined up and started singing unlike most parties though they didn't sound like drowning cats. I mean they almost all go to a preforming arts school so it should sound halfway decent. Closing my eyes I made a wish for Len to always be in my life than I blew out the candles. She smiled at me as she leaned closer grinning as I saw all the candles went out I resisted kissing her. Wasn't too hard with Robert glaring at me. My mouth dropped open even further when I saw her present to me. A brand new Starclassic Bubinga Select I know how expensive these things are I mean they are limited edition and reserved for only the richest.

I could barely breath or speak how did she? So fast? I was speechless which seemed to please her. Guess she knew how to get me to shut up. " _Happy Birthday Damian"_ Yes it was she kissed my check as Robert nodded, my heart skipped a beat. Just this morning I was feeling sorry for myself because mum didn't care enough to even remember and now I was being showered by the greatest girlfriend in the world, I only had one question what the heck was I going to get her? I had one day to figure it all out and zero funds to make it happen. 


	23. Chapter 23

**Leni**

" _Leni are you paying attention?"_

" _Huh?"_

I shock my head trying to clear out these overgrown cobwebs of thoughts.

" _Sorry Unity what were you saying?"_

" _It's okay girl but are you?"_

All eyes were on me Damian, Unity, Kit, Gemma, Roger, Liam, Ashok all staring at me. Swallowing I forced myself to drink some of my soda as I gathered my thoughts.

" _Yea I'm okay sorry just overwhelmed with everything what was the question?"_

" _The question my dear was what kind of youtube videos inspire you?"_

" _I personally love singer song writers Damian prefers comedy ones, Kit likes the fan fives"_

" _Who are the fan five?"_

Kit became enlightened as his face brightened his hands started flying and he started talking excitedly. " _Omg_ _o_ _h my Gosh you have never heard of the fan five? What planet is that castle of yours on?"_ I looked at Liam who shrugged seemingly having no clue who these people were either while Kit quickly scrolled through youtube.

" _The fan five stands for The fantastic Five they consist of_ _Kioholborn"_

" _Huh?"_

" _That's his stage name wait here let me show you"_ Kit pressed play the video of a young boy with blond spiky hair with pink and purple highlights through his Mohawk filled the screen.

" _Helllllllllooooooo all you gorgeous people!_ The boy's voice was high pitched and he was doing hand motions against his face blowing out kisses. " _Welcome to my video of the week bitches!"_

He snapped his fingers " _First I just want to ask how all you lovely people are doing"_

He waited of course there were no answers his face showed disappointment than mock anger " _Alright fine don't answer whatever"_ He put his hand up as if to say talk to the hand. " _Just kidding duh I know you can't answer but you can tweet me so tweet me bitches ya know my handle and ya know I like to be handled by my handle"_

Winking he grinned " _Now onto the reason we are here my video of the week and to help me out this week I have with me the fabulous Molly Via"_

I expected a girl to appear but another teenage boy popped up he was taller thinner darker skinned hazel eyes buzz cut normally a dark black but now dyed blond he was dressed in a halter top black with rime stones all over it the words Fierce Fab Fun in purple glittery letters across his chest. Black tight jeans that were so skin tight you could see every part of his body outlined. Rio as I was just going to call him was in baggy Grey shiny shorts and a bright pink t-shirt with cotton candy on it. They than went into a game where someone read the most ridicules words and they tried to guess the meaning while the real meaning was flashed across the screen. Kit and I were laughing so hard we were falling into each other tears were coming down my eyes Unity was trying not to laugh but having a hard time and failing at it.

Everyone else was kind of just looking away Damian was looking at another youtube video, Liam, Roger, Ashok were throwing a mini ball at each other. " _These dudes are awesome! Thanks Kit"_

Kit smiled high fiving me as Roger shock his head

" _Your insane Princess those fags are horrible"_

What was he talking about? I didn't see no cigarettes in their hands, I looked to Kit who had an icy look on his face the laughter had stopped " _Watch your mouth American it maybe okay to call people names where your from but I take bullying very seriously taking a piss outta someone because of who they are is not nor will it ever be cool." "_ _T_ _hese boys are_ _m_ _ore than just their sexuality their kind, funny, talented, smart young man do you even know anything about them?"_

Roger was blushing as people were starting to stare holding his hands up Roger laughed " _Sorry dude didn't know you were some kind of fairy loving freak don't get your tutu in a twist"_ Roger hit Liam's arm nodding at Ashok " _Lets split lads will find our own videos somewhere_ _else_ _don't need to offend thee little girlie's"_

I wasn't sure what had just happened but Kit seemed really angry I didn't like Roger's tone or how Liam just shrugged following suit. Ashok looked apologetic but why was he sorry what had happened? Why did Kit take offense to a cigarette where was this thing anyone? I saw none in either boy's hands or the table. Why did Kit bring up their sexuality? I was beyond confused but afraid to look stupid and ask.

" _So Leni what type of videos do you like?"_

" _Honestly I never really looked at youtube so I don't know"_

" _What!"_

" _Oh sister you are deprived come on over here girlfriend we need to educate you"_ I shrugged as Unity pulled me closer while Damian slide behind me wrapping his arms around my waist Kit was still breathing fire but Unity was talking so fast I had no chance to ask Kit if I could help. " _As a singer myself and by singer I mean superstar"_

She snapped her fingers laughing _"_ _I prefer videos of real teens and kids who are trying to make their dreams come true by promoting themselves through ordinal songs, dances._

" _I_ _t takes so much to make it in this business we have to look out for each other help each other I belong to a youtube group called Konnect Kids there's seven of us from all over the world._ _E_ _very summer we go on tour to various malls, sport arena's here's one of the girls in my group her name is Haley she covers a lot of country songs but she's amazing she can do any style."_

I watched as a girl around 16 came on screen she was beautiful with long wavy blond hair to her lower back stylish wearing a yellow cardigan black dress pants her voice was like magic. " _I've learned so much from just watching her like how posture can make or break you watch y_ _our feet should be slightly apart, with one foot slightly in front of the other so that your weight is slightly forward._ _Your knees should be relaxed and slightly bent. When aiming for good posture it can be tempting to lock your knees; be careful not to do this. Your hands should be relaxed and hanging at your sides. Your abdomen should be relaxed but ready to be engaged. To get a sense of how an engaged abdomen feels, place your hands on your waist with your thumbs on your back and cough very lightly."_

Unity had me stand up as she explained each step she had me do them I stood with my feet slightly apart as Damian held up the laptop so we could see it. " _Relax your knees bend slightly watch Haley"_ I did seeing her standing in an empty white bedroom with her legs bent but not stiff she looked like she was riding a horse except her legs were closer to each other not hunched over. Unity massaged my shoulders which sent shivers down my back as I flashed back to last night jumping up feeling my breathing become faster harder I shock my head.

" _Leni relax sorry I didn't mean to hurt you" "You didn't it's just…" "I get it your nervous there's a lot riding on getting this nailed down that's why were all here but instead of competing we can help each other you get further in life helping than hating but if you would rather be alone than"_

" _No!" No please I'm sorry I'm just not use to having friends so it's no please I want the help I'll pay attention go on"_

" _Okay Len"_ _"_ _Your shoulders should slide back and down so that your back is straight and your head is high. Do not hunch or pull your shoulders up towards your ears. Your chest should be slightly up and out— this will likely happen naturally when you pull your shoulders back and down."_

She pulled my shoulders back than had me hunch over so I could feel the difference which I did. " _Your chin should be parallel with the floor — neither lifted or pointed downward." "_ _Y_ _our mouth should be wide open when you sing,_ She pulled at my mouth positioning it so it was open just the right amount than so it was open to wide, I could feel the muscles tense stiffen when it was too wide than relax when it was smaller.

" _B_ _ut avoid the temptation to open it so wide that your face and neck muscles tense up. Check in to make sure that your lips, jaw, and neck feel loose and relaxed._ _Haley is great with the lower posture but sometimes she opens to wide that's when people make the mistake of thinking their singing with their mouths forgetting it's the throat and the diaphragm that really holds the power"_

" _Tonight I want you to go home watch different singers professional and average teens see how they hold themselves see who sounds better make notes and practice"_

We gathered our stuff as the bell rang Kit was still quite which worried me Damian and Unity had started running towards the school building but I hung back with Kit.

" _Kit you can't let these guys get to you whatever it is that's going on it's their ignorance"_

" _Maybe Princess or maybe you have no clue what it really feels to be an outcast to have people hate on you for just being yourself maybe your too sheltered and have no clue what the real world is like"_

He ran ahead what did I ever do to him to make him so judgmental? I was just trying to help what was with people thinking they could say or do anything to me? I was starting to get real tired of being other people's punching bags. 


	24. Chapter 24

**Damian**

" _Thanks for meeting with me Unity" "Sure no problem glad to help I really like Len she's cool I think she needs some mates to help her out she seems so shy. I just want to help her gain self confidence"_

" _You will by helping me create the best birthday present ever Liam suggested making a personal present I can't buy her anything I'm broke and my mum hates her family so she won't help"_

" _Well than lets create the best frigging birthday video she's ever seen"_

Unity and I were meeting after school to browse through the school's library as well as the computers for any videos facts pictures we could find of Leni through the years researching her favorite things like colors, songs, dances, artists anything we could do to make this video. As we were scrolling through years of news footage I spotted something " _Hold up who's that kid there?"_ Unity squinted seeing what I did the twins were about two or younger in this clip and standing behind Simon was another kid around their age. Unity shrugged I didn't remember another child in the royal family but maybe it was a cousin or something. Strange though the boy looked so familiar it was like looking into a mirror. Focus Damian who cares about some long forgotten kid switching to school videos I spotted something.

" _Zoom in right there Unity"_ She did than looked at me " _Is that who I think it is?"_

" _Why yes it is Unity little Miss Courtney"_

" _Why yes and what is little miss thing doing?" "_ _Well it looks like she's cheating on her English test last year" "That one looks like she's changing the score on another test on her teachers laptop"_

We started scanning more videos finding lots of videos of Courtney and her little clique one where she was stealing another girl's homework a few where she was spying on kids while they rehearsed their skits. There was another one where they were hitting a girl shoving her into her locker. " _I think we found more than we came here for" "Yes we did Damian now the question is what do we do with this?"_

" _Do we take it to the headmaster?" "No he seems like a paid off sod" "So Len?"_ _"_ _No she's too sweet to use it against Courtney" "Than what?" "_ _Wait and see I'm sure will find a way to use this"_


	25. Chapter 25

**Eleanor**

Sitting at my vanity waiting for my ladies in waiting to come in and finish my hair and makeup. Breathe Leni just breathe everything will be okay grabbing my bag I pulled out the green cardigan. I had stolen from Lexi's room. Holding it to my face I breathed in her scent maybe it was a little odd but than again my whole life has been a little strange.

Lilacs I never liked them much but now they took on a whole new meaning. Leaning back I stared at myself in the mirror what had she seen in me? Why had she chosen me? I wasn't anyone special my hair was dry a bland light brown my eyes an icy blue I wasn't beautiful. I wasn't tall or short I wasn't rail thin but I wasn't fat. I was just average to most people I was a spoiled brat someone to be handled babysat to others I was invisible.

I wasn't sure what Lexi saw in me I mean did she take her job with the faire so seriously that she thought I was some kind of queen to be worshiped? I didn't want that I just wanted to be treated normally. " _Princess Eleanor your royal highness"_

Snapping my head up I swallowed quickly putting the sweater back in my bag why was I so nervous? All day I had been jittery not even bothering to attend martial arts today, I was so confused I didn't know what to say to her how to deal with any of this. " _Yes Sabrina?"_ My Mistress of the Robes Sabrina Lynn Rose came in curtsying to me she was followed by my Ladies of the Bedchamber Vanessa Misgovern, Lucy Britta, Mia Riley.

" _Princess Eleanor our queen has asked us to help you get ready"_ " _Good luck you'll need it I'm pretty hideous" "Oh dear Eleanor you are anything but ugly you my dear are a beautiful talented passionate young lady and someday you shall see it"_

Sabrina combed out my hair as she looked at me our eyes connecting through my mirror she's been my lady in waiting since I was born she's seen me through everything good, bad. I wish I could tell her this I wish I could tell anybody all my feelings. " _Princess this day is just the start of what will surely be a divine life fourteen why I remember when you were born just a tiny screaming but strong willed infant._ _I can remember the joy on your mum and dad's faces when thee doctors handed you to them" "Yeah I'm sure they were excited about Liam he was the wanted child the spare to the heir"_

" _No Mama it wasn't just him"_

Sabrina slide off my robe as Vanessa helped me stand up Lucy handed me my undergarments. Placing her hands on my shoulders she stared me straight in my eyes. "Y _ou might not of been planned for Eleanor but their love for you is no less pure than theirs for your brothers" "_ _Now Princess we need to get thee dressed"_

Mia helped me slip into my black diamond corset and my matching mini skirt both were designed exclusively for me for this day over the course of the last five months. I heard mum say it cost 6 million to make but it was so worth it. Even I thought I looked pretty sharp Sabrina had piled my hair into a French twist with only a few curls hanging down. " _Ladies"_

I snapped my head up as my mum came inside. " _Sweetheart you look stunning"_ smiling slightly I saw Sabrina and the other ladies bow to mum than Sabrina exchanged a look with me gently kissing my head.

" _Ladies excellent job"_

Coming over mum laid a hand down on my shoulder standing side by side to her I sighed she was just so gorgeous her mid length green and white Chanel dress hugged her chest waist and hips in all the right ways. I could only image it cost around 9 million. Just as I had started to feel some what pretty I take a look at her and feel small worthless and ugly again she didn't even try yet she was radiant. When would I ever develop?

" _Mum were you always beautiful?" "Eleanor"_ She looked at me shaking her head. " _Haven't I always told you that beauty is skin deep?" "Yes mum but it doesn't help I'm not beautiful either way"_ She didn't correct me simply sighing bending down to me " _Eleanor everyone has their flaws no one is perfect I had my struggles as a kid I didn't always feel beautiful growing up on a farm doesn't exactly make one feel sexy. I had to learn how to embrace my flaws turn them into something beautiful something to be proud of"_

She didn't get it she never did how could she? She is beautiful she doesn't need million dollar dresses expensive makeup her skin is never blotchy her teeth are straight gleaming white she doesn't weigh over 100 lbs her eyebrows are perfectly arched. She could eat whatever she wanted and never gain an ounce. Beauty is from the inside that's what she said right. Maybe that's why I was never able to look beautiful on the outside. If people knew what was on my inside they would wish that beheading was still legal.

I would be hung this blackness that has a hold on me is tainting me." _Are you ready my dear? Everyone is here"_ Swallowing I willed myself to get through this night. My voice betrayed me coming out small weak " _Sure"_ She either didn't notice or didn't care cause she just fixed any last minute blemishes, wrinkles on me taking my hand leading me out of my room.


	26. Chapter 26

**Damian**

" _Nervous Damian?"_

Nervous? Me Nah why would I be nervous? I mean it was only dinner with the head of states. I mean her parents were only the king and the queen of England no one special. It's not like they could have me thrown in jail if they didn't like me for their daughter could they? Deep breath man Lavina pounded my back laughing.

" _Boy you look like your going to vomit chill out!"_

" _Easier said than done"_

Our car pulled up to the palace doors I was still in shock Leni had sent this car for us. Thank god though it took so much just to get here we had to have the car pick us up at Kit's house. I lied to my mum told her I was staying at his place. Lavina had to have her friend Mary cover for us telling her parents she was staying at Mary's. We both had to catch the metro to get to Kit's house twenty minutes away by four pm so the car could pick us up. Leni had no idea we were lying but this would be so worth it.

" _Yo D they even open the door for us how sweet is that?"_

" _Uh pretty sweet Vina"_

Her whole face lit up as we stepped outside greeted by an older gentleman. " _Mr. Grant, Miss._ _Bryant_ _I am Ted Oliver head of the king's security welcome to Buckingham palace it is a pleasure to meet your acquittance"_

We shock hands with him as he escorted us inside passing the Australian state coach giving us a tour _"A little insight the_ _palace comprises more than 600 rooms and has been built around a country house originally designed for the Duke of Buckingham in 1705._ _If you look over here to your right that is t_ _he neoclassical frontage of the east wing which faces out towards a ceremonial road the Mall and supports a balcony on which the Royal Family traditionally congregate to greet the crowds outside the gates."_

" _Between the east wing and the gates is the forecourt where the_ ** _Changing of the Guard_** _takes place. We are heading to the_ _blue drawing_ _room to meet the Royal family when in their presences you shall refer to them as Your Majesty and Your Royal Highness it is proper to curtsey's or bow."_

Lavina and I exchanged a look who was this dude? So stiff ordering out commands, if I wasn't nervous before I was getting so now. We entered another room which was super busy people rushing around talking on cell phones servants rushing with trays yelling to coworkers yet even with the noise anyone could hear the audible gasp that escaped both our mouths the art hanging on the walls heck even the architecture of the very walls were breath taking, two spiral stunning marble stair cases lined the sides of the grand hall. " _That's King George III in 1762"_

Lavina pointed to one of the pictures nodding I looked around myself pointing to another picture of a young man dressed in royal robes.

" _That must be George Augustus Frederick IV"_

" _Correct Damian very good you paid attention in school"_

" _Your a comedy act Lavina just because I play sports does not make me dumb"_

" _Okay Mr. Smarty Pants when did he rule?_

" _29 January 1820–26 June 1830"_

" _Dang you did pay attention"_

" _Okay answer me this which king had six children?"_

" _Damn I thought you'd make it hard George V Frederick Ernest Simon Albert"_

" _Oh My god look at those Chandeliers!" Their simply gorgeous!"_

Lavina gasped spinning around as we entered what I guessed was the blue dinning room since it was decorated in blue chairs drapes, even some of the poles were light blue. Inside there were already guests mingling. I saw Gemma as soon as I walked in feeling slightly less nervous even though I didn't care for her much at least she was a familiar face. I had to admit she looked hot to dressed in a simple but elegant white skirt which had some gold sparkling from it a white blouse and gold blazer she looked like a million bucks, course her outfit was probably some big name designer that cost even more than a million.

" _Damian lovely to see you could make it welcome to my second home and who is this,_ I watched her face as she searched Lavina with her eyes sizing her up. My whole body became tense if she so much as dissed a hair on Vina's head I would. " _Lovely young lady who is escorting you this fine evening_ _was she at your party I believe I saw her there_ _?"_

Holy cow she was so different almost cordial proper it took a moment to gather my thoughts as I felt Vina grab my arm a little tighter. I was sure she knew who Gemma was. She's a girl every girl loves diamonds and any girl worth anything knows the Kensington's are one of the oldest diamond cartel families around Gemma is the sole heir to the Kensington multinational jewelery. I can't even start to image how much she will inherit someday more than any of us could ever dream of.

Gemma has modeled since she was a kid she acts just last year she was in an international movie that banked big time in the box offices. Girls everywhere love her want to be her she's been staring in commercials for her family's brand since she was a toddler. Breathe Damian breathe son, they were all waiting for me.

" _This lovely young woman is one of my oldest mates Lavina this is Gemma"_

" _GEMMA KENSINGTON I KNOW OH MY GOD I AM SO EXCITED TO MEET YOU"_ Gemma I give her credit didn't spas back away or even roll her eyes she smiled politely and even chuckled a bit. I guess she's use to over excited fans meeting her. Still it was slightly embarrassing so I squeezed Vina's arm to try to bring her back. Looking at me she saw my eyes than looked back at Gemma back at me her hand flying to her mouth as she turned a different shade of red.

" _Oh my god I am so sorry I must look like a fool it's just I saw you in Fire of the lost arch last year and you were just simply mind blowing. I can't believe you did your own stunts, you were flawless, I admire girls who aren't afraid to be tough take life by the bulls get dirty and yet still remain beautiful"_

" _It's quite alright darling I don't mind gush away it's sweet thank you for saying those things my motto always has been to fight for what I want and don't be afraid to get dirty" "I saw you were admiring the chandeliers"_

" _Yes their lovely do you know anything about them?"_

" _Why of course I grew up here I know almost everything there is to know about the palace about the royal family" "This room is 21 meters (68 feet) long and divided into bays by giant Corinthian columns." "_ _The garnitures of sevres vases painted with dark blue ground date to the second half of the 18_ _th_ _century they were acquired by George the third"_

" _These four chandeliers are cut glass and date from around 1812 manufactured right here in jolly old England home grown" "Queen Helena just had this room redone a few years ago you can see some of the newer additions here as we go towards the table of grand commanders some of these chairs are all new the flooring, the windows were replaced to keep out the cold better"_

She took us all around the room as I saw more people coming in wondering who they all were. Lavina and Gemma seemed to hit it off pretty quickly Vina asking questions about what flooring was used what each of the pictures meant. All I wanted to know was where was Leni? I could see Security was increased at least six men and two woman guards were walking along the room checking everything and everyone out while talking on their headpieces.

" _Oh we should take our places it appears the royal family is ready to make their entrance"_

" _Places?" "Where's that?"_

" _Follow me Damian, Lavina I'll help you tonight and Saturday you are coming Saturday my dear aren't you?"_ She looked to Vina who shrugged. " _You simply must it will be an an amazing time once we get past the pomp and circumstances I'll talk to Leni tonight or Queen Helena I am a lady in waiting for her so I have some pull"_

Vina's eyes lite up as she grabbed my arm silently screaming. What the heck was a lady in waiting and what was she waiting for? Maybe I had some brushing up to do on my Royal etiquette. We followed Gemma across the room I noticed all the guests were lining up now on the right side in some sort of order. Gemma stood behind her parents so Vina and I stood by her as two guards stood at the entrance to the room which was now closed. The trumpet rung out as Ted and another guard hauled open the door both of us gasping as we watched Queen Helena, King Simon enter dressed dashingly he must be wearing Alexander McQueen, She had to have on Chanel I knew this because Vina was gasping it out.

Her arm was draped through his and man did they make a breathtaking couple he was tall his chest puffed out his hair combed and gelled back making him look younger than his forty something years. A guard stood on each of their sides both were smiling as they entered she gave a slight nod to Ted and his helper behind them came Prince Robert in dark blue khaki pants with a black dress shirt and a dark blue vest.

He looked older than sixteen maybe about twenty two but he was handsome no doubt he looked like King Simon as a kid. Another guard stood by him than came Liam and Eleanor her arm looped through his he looked bored while she well damn she was just a vision for sore eyes, that dress I was even blown away while it covered her it fit her so perfectly it was like being naked. I mean every curve every bone I saw it all and it sparkled. Her hair was up allowing my eyes perfect access to her smooth creamy face. Marcus and her guard stood by their sides.

Than came an older man with two twin girls on his arms, they looked slightly older and way more sluttier than Leni with red hair and wide lips. Three guards stood aside and behind them. Queen Helena stopped at the first gentleman in line " _Welcome to our home_ _Prime Minster Jamie" "Thank you my beautiful radiant queen"_

Now I saw who he was I didn't know what a prime minster did but it seemed to be a pretty important job it got people talking every time a new law is passed his name is always mentioned. I see him and his family on TV all the time but now in person he looked different younger not so harsh, he was laughing kissing the queen's hands as he firmly shock the king's hand. " _He's hot"_

Lavina whispered Gemma nudged her to be quite as her parents stared us down. Both of us blushed everyone was so proper. I took notice that Gemma's parents were dressed to the nine's her mum in a pale pink dress a huge hat 6 inch heels her blond hair was piled neatly into a bun her makeup was simple yet beautiful.

Her dad dressed in black suit blue dress shirt with a red tie, he was a bigger guy with a pot belly probably around 6'0 wired glasses his dark brown hair was buzzed down so it made a soft wave as it hung loosely to his upper neck. His hand on Gemma's shoulder told me that he was tough with her keeping her in line yet loved her. Lavina eyed me over her shoulder I knew she wanted to laugh at how stupid all this was, I mean their people just like us we didn't get all this when we walked into a room. Yet to me there was an excitement about all of this didn't we dream of being famous? Well they were they didn't have to dream. " _Princess Eleanor, Prince Liam I wish you the happiest of birthday's"_ He shock their hands than gave them a hug posing for a picture I saw Leni's smile which was tight not genuine. She must hate all of this yet she was cordial with him his wife Christabella their three kids Chrishella who's 14, Tyler who's 11 and Amanda who's nine. I noticed how sweet she was with the kids. Going down the line the family greeted each guest. Than they came to wear we were standing the queen greeted Gemma with kisses on her checks hands as Gemma curtsied to her after her parents.

" _Mr. and Mrs. Kensington Gemma my beautiful darling how are you?"_

" _I'm well My queen how are you?"_

 _Well as well"_

They laughed as I found myself staring right into the King's eyes. " _Who is this handsome lad before me? It wouldn't be thee young man my "only" daughter has been talking about non stop for days could it be?"_

Swallow breathe swallow breathe swallow breathe Oh yeah talk fool talk. First breathe out okay now talk " _Hello Sir I'm Damian Grant_ _t_ _his_ _is my best friend Lavina" "Lovely to meet you both Damian thank you for being such an awesome friend to my daughter take care of her she's very precious to me"_

" _I will sir I promise I will"_

Okay so I am still alive that's good right. We moved to the dinning room I found myself sitting beside her mum's mum who was short yet she was beautiful, powerful. I could see how much she loved her grandchildren. Doting over Robert's new facial hair ruffling his shaggy brown hair which he couldn't seem to gel back today. Fussing over how thin Leni was pinching Liam's checks calling him a demi god which seemed to make him blush. She didn't say much to her daughter the queen but she hugged king Simon she seemed to talk openly with him. Lavina sat next to the dark haired guy who had come in with the twin red heads. On my other side was another older lady. " _Young man what is your name?" "I'm_ _Damian_ _Grant Ma'am it's lovely to meet you"_ Shaking her hand she smiled at me " _A pleasure it is I am Elizabeth Henstridge Simon and Cyrus Mum"_

She nodded to the man by Lavina uh so that was the king's brother Cyrus he looked younger in real vision. Pulling out Leni's chair I helped her hold her gown so she could sit stealing a kiss on her neck before her dad turned. Dinner started with a hors d'oeuvre which was placed on our plates looking at it I wondered what the heck it was. I didn't wan to be rude but it looked um gross

" _Here's a trick my lad to eating Foie gras hold it in one hand have your drink in another I suggest Sauternes it's sweet it balances out the saltiness of the duck swallow the duck quickly drink it'll wash it down before you can taste it"_

If this was so nasty why did people eat it? Breathe deep Damian I saw Leni had already eating two of them. So she must like it but to me it smelled nasty Lavina was staring at it like what the heck was this why am I being forced to eat it? The queen's mum whispered to me

" _This is Eleanor's favorite dish every time I take her to France we dine on this on the balcony of her favorite restaurant La Cordonnerie_ _it's a small private restaurant that one has to make reservations for months in advance"_ I took another deep breath following her advice.

I still had some taste kind of creamy salty very rich. It wasn't nasty though. The wine was strong but tasted nice fruity rich it was truly perfect together although give me a slice of pizza and I would be happier.

" _Damian thank you for being a gentleman I saw you held the chair out for my daughter"_

Oh my god the queen was talking to me. I felt my breath catch as I watched her slowly eat the foie gras how should I answer? _"I always see in movies how the gentleman holds the door open pulls the chair out I want to be a gentleman she deserves a gentleman"_

" _Yes my daughter does thank you for noticing how important my beautiful daughter is" "_ _How are you liking this new school?"_

" _I'm loving it Ma'am I mean your majesty"_

" _Relax my dear you can simply call me Queen Helena, I'm glad to hear your liking it seems to be an excellent school what is your chosen path of study?"_

" _Music My Queen with a minor in acting"_

" _Do you play any instruments?"_

" _I do indeed your majesty I play drums, guitar a little"_

" _Did you know Liam also plays guitar?"_

" _No My queen I did not"_

" _Mum I'm not that good at guitar"_

" _Gemma how are you fairing at this school?"_

" _Well my queen I love being back with my baby"_

I watched her loop her arm through Liam's as he tried to eat our second course consommé which didn't go to well when someone grabs you suddenly. It seemed to take extra strength to hold his anger in. Why would he get angry with his girlfriend wanting to be close? Yet he held it together smiling politely.

" _Yes it's lovely to have Gemma so close again we really missed each other over the summer I didn't think I would get to see her this year except at these social gatherings"_ Gemma's mum answered

" _Were happy Gemma found something she truly loves to do were very proud of her she's becoming a beautiful strong independent young woman were glad she's found a true gentleman such as you Liam we debated over sending her to this school though she had offers from quite a few elite schools Gemma works hard always has"_

" _Lavina what school do you attend?"_

" _Do you act or play any instruments?"_

" _No Ma'am to the acting I mean I do play piano but only as a hobby I focus on my studies I really want to be a marine biologist when I get older. I love animals dolphins, whales sea creatures are my weakness._ _I play football as well I was left full backer all season last year and this year I am starting as a forward"_

" _So how long have you and Damian_ _been mates_ _"_

" _We_ _'ve been_ _best mates since we were like three and I stole his cookies in preschool"_

" _Oh man she got you whipped when you were three"_

Cyrus seemed to think this was hysterical laughing like crazy

" _Perfect for my niece she has no balls either"_

" _Cyrus that is highly inappropriate she is a young lady and proper young ladies are gracious kind quietly strong"_

Cyrus sipped his wine rolling his eyes at his brother. I wanted to kill Vina at that moment.

" _Relax Damian"_

Vina chuckled addressing me was I really that tense? Did my face look as red as it felt? " _At least I didn't tell them how hard you cried when it happened until Mrs. Blake gave you new cookies"_ Well if I wasn't red before I was now _._ Leni was giggling as she stared at me winking I knew I blushed even harder when she mouthed. " _Your adorable"_

Okay I could live with that. " _Damian's an amazing talented lad_ _I'm glad he's found someone who treats him right I hope I find someone who treats me like a princess"_

" _Any suiters?"_

" _Not yet but_ _I have my eyes on_ _one_ _bloke"_

Wait she did who? I stared at her how did I not hear of this before? " _He's an amazing football player he plays Center I just met him last week so it's very new but I think we would make a cute couple but he hasn't noticed me yet"_ Why was she glancing at Liam and Gemma.


	27. Chapter 27

**Damian**

After Dinner we moved to another room they called this the white drawing room it was equally as amazing as the last two. Sitting on a couch that must cost more than my whole flat. I watched while Leni folded her skirt sitting in between her mum and grandmum Grand Dutches of Oxford Alexandra as I have come to learn. Liam and Robert each sat in a chair all the furniture were pure white with gold fussing. The prime minster his family, Cyrus the twins all sat scattered around a fire burned low but gave off amazing heat. King Simon sat in a huge chair his voice carried like a church organ when he spoke. _"I love to relax after dinner here with a good glass of wine and a book any one have any suggestions for good reads?"_

" _What about that book for class?"_ Gemma spoke up.

I shock my head what book? Oh yeah we were assigned one in class today. I barely remembered it my eyes were focused only on how amazing Leni's legs looked as she crossed them how her eyes sparkled when she talked to her grandmum.

" _What was the book called again?"_

" _Queen of Hearts I believe Sir'"_

" _Thank you Liam have you started it?"_

" _No I forgot all about it"_

" _When is it due?_ _"_

" _First part is due by tomorrow Sir"_

" _Thank you Gemma did you read it?"_

" _I did Sir it was a fascinating read I didn't want to put it down but my mum wouldn't let me read past the first three chapters she always tells me to listen to my teachers"_

" _She's a wise woman your mum but you know that Jamie"_ Her Mum gave a hearty laugh as she bowed her head to King Simon. _"Damian did you read it yet?" "Uh No Sir I forgot all about it been so busy with my other assignments" "Eleanor I suppose it's pointless to ask" "No Dad I forgot" "Leni go to your room retrieve the book you kids will have to learn how to handle multiple tasks if you want to make it in the industry" "Yes Sir'"_

Leni quickly ran to her room coming back she handed it to her dad. " _Now what was the assignment?"_ I repeated it to him than he handed the book to Gemma. " _Since you were the only one to do the assignment you may read first my dear" "_ _Thank you Sir'"_

Gemma's voice carried strong almost musical like making the words flow like a velvety river of chocolate.

" _The cool winds of the fall blew roughly against_ _my_ _back like the birds in the sky_ _I_ _lifted_ _my_ _arms wide towards the heaven's sky,_ _I_ _wasn't trying to fly not that_ _I_ _would mind spreading_ _my_ _arms flying towards those white fluffy clouds high above_ _my_ _head. Than_ _I_ _could be at peace and be with her._ _I_ _missed her with a roughness that could not be described the feel of her arms against_ _mine_ _her bare stomach as_ _we_ _lay together cuddled lips against her neck sending tingles through_ _my_ _spine._ _I_ _was cold now as the sun went behind the clouds damn it why did everything warm, good leave?_

 _I_ _should be use to it_ _I_ _suppose after all life has never been easy for_ _me_ _I_ _was born with all the luxuries any girl could ever ask for money spilling out_ _of my_ _pores, the finest in clothes yet_ _I_ _had never truly been happy._ _I_ _acted like a bad-ass that much was for sure._ _I_ _played the role well_ _I_ _pretended nothing bothered_ _me,_ _bottled it all up_ _I_ _had to for surely no one cared about what_ _I_ _was feeling they asked how_ _I_ _was doing but it was for show. They had to it was the type of questions every reporter asked upon interviewing the subject of two well known Hollywood Legends. Astrid and Adam Roans. Legendary Hollywood producer and Extraordinary Actresses."_

Gemma passed the book to Liam who read half heartedly.

" _They didn't care though why should they?_ _I_ _was a nobody born into this world of riches, fame, glamor but_ _I_ _did nothing to earn_ _my_ _place._ _Living my_ _life knowing_ _I_ _could never measure up to_ _my_ _Mom's talent beauty and grace._ _I_ _could never have_ _my_ _dad's creativity_ _his visions of all things horror, glamor the stuff people dream of when they think of big blockbusters. No_ _I_ _was just ordinary_ _I_ _wasn't super model material not like_ _my_ _hunky twin brother Liam born five minutes earlier but with so much talent charm and cuteness that everyone fell in love with him at first glance even as babies it was always Liam everyone commented on."_

Liam grinned flipping back his hair nodding "W _ell I am super cute Leni you have every right to be jealous"_

Leni rolled her eyes but she seemed strangely pale as he read her eyes focused on the story. Handing the book to Leni her voice seemed to shake as she read.

" _He was the one photographers begged and paid millions to get one picture of._ _I_ _was just as well hidden behind the giant castle walls that made up_ _my_ _Hollywood Hills home._ _I_ _was happy there to for the most part being invisible no expectations no disappointment right?_ _I_ _never expected to fall in love yet_ _I_ _did the how the why is a mystery_ _I_ _could not explain._ _Why anyone would love_ _me_ _was beyond_ _me_ _I_ _could barely love_ _myself_ _yet for some unknown reason Laura had found a way to love to adore_ _me_ _._

 _Laura was beautiful in ways most people could only dream of but she wasn't just rich in outer beauty but inwards for beauty was more than just skin deep. She didn't believe in labels she believed in just being herself. If that wasn't good enough too bad. It was someone else's problem not hers she loved herself that was all that mattered. She tried desperately to teach_ _me_ _that it was sort of starting to work_

 _I_ _was learning to believe that we made our own luck. Than the unthinkable happened one dark stormy night after too much partying Laura drove herself home she was too drunk she shouldn't of been driving but she lived by her own rules she died by her own rules._

Handing me the book I took over. " _Now I_ _was lost homeless kicked out by_ _my_ _parents when the truth came out, no lover by_ _my_ _side to hold_ _me_ _tell her_ _I_ _was special._ _N_ _ow_ _I_ _was just another statistic hidden behind the shadow of the buildings._ _Left wondering who am I? Where do I fit in?_

 _I_ _didn't know maybe_ _I_ _never really did_ _my_ _whole life_ _I_ _spent wondering where_ _I_ _fit in why should now be any different? Laura use to say that we all had a purpose it just took some of us longer to find it. She_ _use_ _to tell_ _me_ _that when she felt alone she had to remember we all feel that way sometimes. Yet for_ _me_ _it never worked_ _I_ _just wanted to be normal. Normal wasn't looking at boys and feeling nothing it wasn't looking at another girl's smile and feeling_ _my_ _own face flush with embarrassment, wonder a little shame._

 _I knew I was a little different from the time I was a kid maybe around ten or eleven or so but I didn't know what that difference was or what it would mean for my life. Yet somehow it didn't stop kids from making fun of me."_

My eyes were burning from this light so I handed the book back to Leni who seemed to enjoy reading more than any of us.

" _It wasn't till I got older that I started putting the pieces together like. I meet a girl but I'm confused why I'm self-conscious around her._ _Why do_ _I_ _always want to be as close to her as possible? Why do_ _I_ _want to look_ _my_ _absolute best when_ _I_ _see her. Maybe it's because_ _I_ _want to do things to her._ _Why I envision a_ _game of spin the bottle when I've had a few tequilas._ _I_ _had always been attracted to girls. I remember having crushes on girls since the third grade though I didn't consider myself a lesbian. In the third grade, I didn't even know what a lesbian was. It didn't dawn on me until the seventh grade that… hey, I'm a lesbian._ _So I guess in retrospect_ _knowing was never the question. It was accepting it that was the question. I started being attracted to girls at age seven, so I knew that I wasn't straight. It just took me a while to say to myself, I'm a lesbian and I'm okay._ _People tend to focus on the sex part of homosexuality that's what they picture. They don't understand that there is love involved, too. Whoever you fall in love with, that is normal sexuality. Normal is in the eye of the beholder._ _It's hard to believe that though when your a scared lonely loveless kid sleeping on the streets never knowing where your next meal will come from when the last sixteen years you've spent pampered waited on." "_ _Shame can choke us kill us if we let it"_

" _Okay that's enough for tonight kids so what did you guys think about it?"_ King Simon asked everyone. " _Liam what was your take on Alex's view?"_

" _I think she's really screwed up I mean how do you not know who your attracted to? Only someone who's sick in the head wouldn't know if they liked boys or girls"_

" _Damian?"_

" _I mean I don't know it's hard to get a grasp on the character from only a few paragraphs she seems lost, confused I feel sorry for her it must suck"_

" _Gemma?"_

" _Well growing up as an aristocratic I find it interesting that Alex's sexuality is more controversial in her upper-class world than it seems to be in Laura's world."_

" _I mean if I was a lesbian which I am not cause I love my boys I would find it scary that my parents would reject me based on something so silly as my sexuality it's only one part of me not the whole being"_

Gemma's parents looked at her smiling tightly " _Well you'll never have to deal with that dear cause you are perfectly normal"_

" _Leni what are your views?"_

She seemed unable to answer why was she so pale now? " _Eleanor are you okay?"_ Her dad asked I saw her breathing heavy as she looked around seeming lost slowly she tried to ask something.

" _Were suppose to find out what you guys think" "Mum what would you think if I came out as.. as a Lesbian like Alex did?"_

" _Well sweetie I will always love you but remember we have a reputation to uphold. I have spent years cultivating this family's image think about what you would be doing to all that work does it feel wrong?" If it feels wrong it probably is so I would suggest staying quite no one needs to know all our business Alex should of never said anything sometimes staying silent is the right thing to do" "_ _Cyrus, Simon do you agree?"_

King Simon was watching his wife as Cyrus seemed focused on his niece. _"Helene I agree that we as a family have an image to maintain yet I also have always told the kids to be themselves I would never be ashamed of any of my kids but I would prefer for my kids to be normal life would be easier for them"_

" _Leni?"_ Before I could even whip my head up I saw Leni cover her mouth getting up running from the room. 


	28. Chapter 28

**Eleanor**

I was sick no wonder I felt so different I was a walking sin Mum said so herself even laying here on my bed hours later I was still shaking. What did this make me? What could I do to change it? Closing my eyes didn't help I was still dizzy as shit. They couldn't know they would disown me. I wasn't like Gemma or Lavina I didn't look at boys and see how cute or funny they were. I mean I liked Damian he's a great kid and not a bad kisser but I didn't feel fireworks. I didn't image spending the rest of my life with him.

I didn't have butterflies in my stomach when he held my hands, I didn't get heart palpations when he looked at me. The person I fancied didn't have an Adams apple the person I couldn't stop dreaming about had two amazing breasts. She had a smile that sent shivers down my spine she had hands that when she touched me were like slick caressing my spine. So many questions were soaring through my brain nothing could calm me down. My stomach was so upset I couldn't even count how may times I had vomited.

My head just pounded. I heard the knocking on my door but I didn't want to answer why couldn't people just leave me alone?

" _Leni it's Robbie may I please come in?"_

No Robbie you can't your too perfect you would never understand he knew me to well he would know something is wrong he's too smart he would trace everything back the comments the questions the look on my face and he would know. I would die! I'm a freak he would never love me once he knew I never answered but he came in anyway. Dizziness overtook me as I felt him sit on the bed the weight shifting I felt is hand on my stomach deep breath Leni deep breath. Act normal don't be afraid

" _Leni what happened back there?" Everyone is worried Damian is worried he did something wrong Mum is calling Dr. Cohen Dad is grilling everyone down there you look pale sis are you sick?"_

I squeezed my eyes shut tightly willing the pounding of my head to stop. Don't look at Robbie he had no idea how sick I was feeling his hand on my forehead, I shivered would it seep through? Could he catch this sickness?

" _Sis talk to me please"_

Slowly sitting up I felt everything spinning " _Leni"_

I felt my stomach come up saw him jump back as he grabbed a garbage can shoving it under my mouth as I vomited but not in time before it went all over my bed and the floor. " _Leni threw up mum!"_ Great now everyone would know sure enough within seconds Mum, Rachael, Prudence, Sabrina and Lucy flew inside my room.

Prudence started cleaning up my mess I felt awful for her Sabrina, Lucy helped me out of bed so Mum could start to change me while Lucy took my temp. the movement made me sicker. Sabrina held me while I pucked over and over. Mum rubbed my back while someone held my hair patting me down with a cool wet cloth. I didn't deserve her tenderness if she knew what I really was she wouldn't be so attentive to me she would hate me disown me she would be ashamed of me. She wanted a normal daughter a perfect daughter that would never be me.

Dr. Cohen came over took blood work took my vitals and samples of my private functions gross. All to be told I had the stomach bug but he was wrong what I had couldn't be cured with antibiotics or rest this sickness was inside of me. It was going to eat me alive destroy me rotting away on my insides till it ate away at my core. It wasn't fair to my beautiful family they deserved better they shouldn't be tainted by my disease.

Tears slipped over my eyes why would god do this to me? Why would he let this sickness consume me on my birthday? Why let me live? He should of killed me nothing not even death could be this painful. Sabrina stayed by me through the night stroking my face

" _Eleanor sweetie relax it's okay it is just a stomach bug you'll be fine by Saturday"_

Sabrina gently sung to me as she kissed my head. I couldn't push her away I was too weak at some point she switched places with mum who held me laying my head on her chest. Wrapping her arms around my shivering body pulling the blankets closer to my body. I think she thought if she distracted me. I wouldn't worry so much about what was going on with me but how could I not? I was sick she just didn't understand how sick I was she thought I would be cured as soon as these drugs kicked in but she was wrong nothing not even a movie with this very cute teenage actress could cure me. Damn though this Ellen girl had a cute bum those dimples man. Oh god! Make it go away! There it was again this sickness creeping through me.

Groaning I closed my eyes praying for it to be taken out of me. Mum kissed my face as she rubbed my arms. At some point I fell asleep because when I woke up it was dark in my room no one was there feeling better I sat up grabbing my phone and headphones. I scrolled through to find my youtube app. Once I found it I nervously typed into the browser "Kioholborn _"_ I started going through his videos he had so many over a two year span I watched them fascinated by him.

He's unique some videos were funny him fooling around with impressions of celebrities, some with friends doing strange games or challenges. Some cometary on movies or music some rants about subjects that annoyed him. Than there were some serious ones where he talked about coming out as gay he is so young yet he's so confident on who he is I felt my eyes filling up as he said

" _So what your different that isn't a bad thing I am gay and I am proud of it so what that I like the same gender it's no one else business I am still an amazing person who deserve love respect and I will get it damn it. If your different take that embrace it own it_ _don't think it will happen overnight either it_ _will take time that's okay take the time you need to be comfortable in who you are explore it than fucking celebrate because you are fabulous as you are!"_

I felt like I was chocking I could barely breath but I couldn't stop watching he was fabulous smart funny cute but what did he have to do with me? His story wasn't mine I kept listening " _What do I do if I am scared my family won't accept me?" "This comment makes me sick I was so lucky to have the love respect and pride of my parents I have never once had to fear being abandoned but sadly for many LGBT youth that is not the same story and I don't get it!_ He slammed his right fist into his left his face getting redder as he spoke _._

" _How can you bring a child into this world promise to love them take care of them than as soon as they come to you with their hardest most painful_ _secret_ _trusting that you as their parent will love them and accept them._

" _T_ _ake that trust that fear and throw it into their faces how can you suddenly stop loving that child just because they say the words Mum, Dad I am gay, I am bisexual I am trans I am pansexual like how I really want to know what changes in your eyes so quickly that you go from loving this child who you brought into the world to hating them to being disgusted, how can you treat them like their nothing throw them out of their only home."_

" _Love isn't suppose to be conditional you don't get to choose how someone lives their life to please you it's sick if you are afraid of that being your story than you don't need to come out publicly you just need to come out to yourself be happy with who you are and just remember that someday you will be able to come out someday you will leave these four walls behind high school will be over you will go to college or you will find a job you will find happiness it will get better._ _I promise you this just hold on because there is a world of happiness out there and I need you here to see it"_

Scrolling down through the comment section I saw so many nasty ones and many supportive ones.

A user named Oceanbandusa said "The moment _Kioholborn_ _has a better arse than you do"_

Another user Lobrittanna commented _"_ _Kioholborn_ _you're_ _ **SO**_ _mature and wise for your age... You also slay but that's besides the point :)_

AllyLopez11 Said _"I'm so happy you're comfortable with your sexuality, I am too! Thumbs up if you're LGBTQ and proud?"_

Than I read one by Gayboyyaknow who said _"I just started watching you and I just want to say congratulations on coming out to your viewers and I accept you regardless of your sexuality. You deserve to be happy and your sexuality doesn't define you or how funny or great you are. Not everyone will accept you but focus on the people who do because you have every right to love whoever you want weather that be a girl or a boy."_

Rainbowboy675 _"You are fking anazinggggggggggg! Never felt soo amazed by someone i love u queeeeeeeennnn"_

Godscreation commented " _God made Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve go kill yourself freak!" "You are an abomination a sin you don't deserve to live you make me sick!"_

I started shaking as I read some more comments the names blurred together but the comments made my eyes burn. " _Bitch you gay AF you make yourself sound like a girl bitch something wrong with you I outta slap the fuck out your parents for them raising a disgusting_ _fag_ _child like you, bitch if you like d*** you gay._

 _You are scum to this earth smh if I was your parents I would have been disowned your ass"_

I couldn't read anymore quickly swipping at the screen to get off of that page I found myself on another page Brina and Meritt our lesbian love story. Video after videos I saw were a mixture of cover songs original songs than there were some funny ones of just them dancing or playing around they seemed so happy kissing each other touching each other laughing. Would I ever have that?

Swallowing I felt the pounding coming back as I laid back. They both had beautiful voices but the comments on their pages were just as gross and body numbing. How can someone be so cruel?

I mean Brina is gorgeous with those luscious lips so full and pink those dimples that made her whole face light up. Those long sexy legs and damn she is a badass standing on the edge of the cliff arms wide open as she pretended to fall but Meritt of course caught her, I couldn't do it trusting that someone would catch me. Even when they both fell down the hill rolling in the sand sneezing they didn't get mad at each other they just laughed it off had a sand fight than fell into each others arms laughing kissing watching the sunset over the ocean. It was kind of perfect. I wanted that with someone special one day settling deeper into my bed.

I watched some more videos by them one where they were on a bed in matching pink bras making a video for breast cancer awareness giving each other exams. I felt my heart rate increase as I saw Brina exam Meritt my body felt warm and it wasn't due to any fever. The next video was of Merritt coming out she was nine when she had a crush on a girl in her class than she was told at age 11 she was too young to know who she was to come out. So how old where you old enough to know? Was 13 too young? How was I suppose to figure it out? Who could I ask? I just couldn't ask anyone. I kept listening as she told about coming out to friends, but I couldn't trust anyone. I barely knew Damian, Kit, Unity how would they handle it? Damian liked me I didn't want to hurt him, Unity would probably be disgusted. Kit he may understand he seemed to really like Kioholborn but did that mean he would accept me? What if no one did?

I felt my breath intake watching as Brina came out to her family, church live " _I always had crushes on girls I feel my heart flutter when a pretty girl looks at me you know I have been living with Merrit for awhile now what you don't know is that I am in love with Merritt I want to marry her have kids with her. I want to spend the rest of my life in her arms in her bed" I am in love with her I am a lesbian I am proud of who I am"_ She came from a small town which wasn't accepting of her someone told her " _I'll pray for god to heal your diseased soul" "Your a living a sin lying to yourself it's a phrase repent and you shall be forgiven"_

Someone threw holy water at her than spit on her. I felt tears coming down as I saw her father take a towel dry her off and kiss her head telling her he loved her accepted her and supported her. Would my dad still love me? Because no matter how hard I tried to deny it the truth was staring me in my face. I am physically attracted to girls emotionally attracted to girls. I am a lesbian and I am not okay with it. Would I ever be I am not so sure. 


	29. Chapter 29

**Eleanor**

" _Good morning my lil princess how are you feeling"_

" _Morning Dad uh I guess okay"_

Reaching over to feel my forehead he seemed satisfied.

" _No fever that's a good sign are you sure you want to go to school today babe?"_

" _Have to dad we can't miss classes there really strict with that there"_

" _Leni I'm sure they wouldn't mind after all I am the king of England and if I feel my daughter is too sick to go to school there is nothing they can do about that"_

" _Yea dad they can expel me"_

" _Leni"_

" _Dad I'm fine really"_

Taking a seat at the counter in the kitchen yawning. I tried to mentally prepare myself for another long day as dad set down a plate of eggs in front of me. " _Toast Leni?"_ My stomach revolted against the smell of food. Staff members were just starting to show up as dad fixed Liam and Robert a plate of food. " _Morning Princess Eleanor" "Morning Chef Sue"_

I tried eating some eggs but as soon as I lifted the fork my stomach started feeling sick all I could see were the comments from last night why was dad staring at me? Did I look that bad? Of course I did I mean I am ugly I'm probably a disgrace to him. " _Morning sweetheart"_ Mum breezed in even though it was only 4:30 am and most of us looked pretty awful she well she looked radiant in her royal blue gown which went to her knees her makeup was on point her hair looked like she had stepped out of a magazine in a fancy French bun. She breezed in with a whiff of expensive perfume. Gliding over to dad she gave him a kiss " _Good morning Simon"_

" _Helena my love looking radiant as always"_

Her laughter filled the room as I played with my eggs waiting on my brothers. " _What would you like to eat my love?" "Just tea my dear I have to watch my figure for tomorrow" "Helena you always look lovely you don't need to lose weight" "Thank you dear but a girl can never be too thin"_

" _Eleanor eggs after you threw up seriously Simon she needs to take it easy"_

Mum swiped the plate away from me _"Just tea and toast one piece only carbs are not a teenage girls friend" "Helena she barely weighs 70 lbs she's perfectly healthy" "Yea dear I know she's healthy but she must be more than healthy she's thee princess of england and she's a dancer she needs to be thin, muscular"_

Mum reached over feeling my forehead her eyes dug into mine. " _How are you really feeling?"_ I shrugged _"Babe if your still feeling sick stay home rest you have an important day tomorrow"_

" _No mum I'll be fine I have to go to school"_

" _Eleanor while I am glad your taking education seriously tomorrow is a royal celebration and your royal duties must always be number one"_

" _Mum I know I take it seriously but school is my number one I will probably never see the throne so I need to prepare for life outside of school and the palace"_

" _Darling I hear what your saying but honestly you look pale eat the toast if you keep it down you can go"_

The food was still turning my stomach but I could see she was serious as she sat by me. Rubbing my back I wished I could talk to her maybe she would understand.

" _That's what I love so much about you Eleanor just like your dutchie and me you are reliant and you don't give up but seriously eat that toast"_ Biting into it I swallowed trying to keep it down. _"Eleanor hurry up and eat you have a lot of work to go before your presentable to the world"_ Groaning I swallowed the last bite of my toast _"Mum You really think I am like you and dutchie?"_

Mum ruffled my hair as she stared at me sending shivers down my spine. " _Your my daughter babe of course you take after me and mum now go upstairs and clean up oh for the love of diamonds Liam you look like you just rolled out of bed"_

My brothers came strolling in Robert looking impeccable navy slacks white crisp dress shirt and navy blue blazer his hair gelled back his shoes shined, he smelled amazing. While Liam came in his suit ruffled hair a mess. Mum groaned getting up taking Liam by the arm " _Back upstairs Liam and get yourself sorted out Eleanor you as well you both need to take lessons from Robert"_

" _Helena go easy on them their kids" "Simon their fourteen now they are no longer children but young men and woman"_

" _Mum relax I just want food and than I'll clean up"_

" _Not an option now Liam it's Five Fifteen you both need to get your butts in gear_ _you should have been up a half hour ago showered and dressed in a clean unwrinkled uniform"_

" _Is Madeline here?" "Here your Majesty" "Good Liam needs a clean unwrinkled school uniform yesterday"_ His lady in waiting hurried off to get a uniform as mum dragged him upstairs.

Sighing I followed them Sabrina hurrying close behind me. Loud footsteps echoed coming from the other direction looking up I saw Dutchie coming towards me " _Sabrina thank you for your service but I'll take it from here I would like a moment alone with my granddaughter please"_

Pushing me into the bathroom she closed the door behind me. " _Now we must hurry up and shower dear we have very little time a proper lady is always ready Eleanor. I know we have always treated you like a princess"_ Getting in the shower I wondered what this was all about. " _I am a princess Dutchie, thee princess isn't that what you and mum always drilled into me?"_ The warmth of the running water felt amazing against my tired sick body.

" _That's very true my love but there's a lot more that goes into being thee princess than just tittles and fancy dresses"_

" _I don't even like dresses Duthcie"_

Stepping out of the shower she wrapped a big fluffy towel around me leading me to the mirror. Using another towel to dry my hair she pulled me close.

" _Eleanor now that you are 14 there's a lot of things that are about to change for starters the world will be watching you more closely you are no longer a child_ _now sweetheart so you have to always remember that wherever you go someone will be ready and waiting to bring you down, There will be a lot more expected of you You know as Queen your mum is thee head of the church"_

" _Yes Dutchie"_

" _Well every Sunday she holds meetings here at the palace" "Do you know what your mum's role is?"_

" _No not really"_

" _Well babe as the queen she_ _is to respect and_ _recognize_ _these various faiths, and to promote tolerance and understanding between people of different religions." "_ _Now that you are older you will be excepted to take on a role for the youth teens little girls everywhere look up to you, your mum wants you to start attending these meetings with her learn how she does these meetings so you can start holding your own with youth" "You will travel around the country and eventually the world" "You will start watching her seeing how she interacts with people what her duties are" "You will also be in charge of creating your own charity finding people who you trust to work for you promoting that charity"_

My head was spinning with all this rush of information causing my fingers to stumble as I tried to dress she was flawless as she brushed my hair out never missing a beat. " _I know it's a lot to take in but you are a Henstridge,_ _You are strong, you are brave and you will get through this I promise_ _Leni"_ Kissing my check she smiled as turned me around fully dressed now putting down my collar she wiped off any dust checking me over. Standing there next to my dutchie I should feel powerful I should of felt loved treasured beautiful but instead I felt small, intransigence, fat, ugly, she wasn't tall yet her confidence made her seem 6'0.

I tried hearing her words " _You are strong, you are brave and you will get through this I promise_ _Len_ _i"_ But all I heard in my head was this little voice taunting me _"She's lying your Not beautiful you are not strong! You aren't brave don't let her fool you Eleanor you know who you are you're Ugly', 'stupid', 'a waste of space', 'useless', 'pathetic' you're sick! Your a freak a lesbian a disgrace"_

" _Eleanor baby girl?"_

I shock my head clearing it she was staring at me play the role Leni smiling I stood on my tippy toes and kissed her check. " _Thanks Dutchie it is a lot but your right I'll be fine now Dutchie if you'll excuse me I must pee before I head to school and as a proper lady I do request some privacy"_

Her laughter filled me up patting my bum she shock her head.

" _Hurry u_ _p_ _babe your mum will kill me if your late"_

Honestly it sounded so normal a mum mad because her teenage daughter is running late a grandmum trying to convince her grandbaby that she is normal happy beautiful but as I stood there looking in the mirror. I could see the images of her and my mum standing besides me tall beautiful powerful both amazing in their own ways, I also saw me small ugly and frightened. I am not normal I don't fit in at school, I don't fit in here.

I wish I could be happy sitting down to relive myself, I couldn't shake this cold feeling how she didn't see through me is beyond me maybe. I was a great actress I was great at hiding things no one seemed to guess how much pain I was in how afraid. Liam never guessed he was my twin brother Damian didn't see past my fake smiles, he fell for my pretend kisses he seemed to even like it feel something from it.

Flushing I washed my hands could I keep it up? Would I fool the world? Looking up I saw a girl behind me she looked sad staring at me " _You'll never be good enough Eleanor you'll never be like your mum she's the queen she's perfect your just ugly a wannabe keep telling yourself your somebody but your just a liar a fake no one likes a faker"_

Blinking I saw she was gone spinning I blinked again now I saw Lavina she wasn't royalty she was a commoner yet she was confident in who she was proud she was beautiful. I saw my mum as a kid working in the fields going to school taking care of her sister. I was never going to be like them. I wasn't tall like my mum. I didn't have my dutchie's confidence, I wasn't rail thin I wasn't beautiful. I had so many things swirling inside my head I felt sick again I couldn't breathe, how was I suppose to measure up?

My head pounded my knees felt weak before I knew it I was on my knees in front of the toilet bowel emptying everything I had eating. Why couldn't I just be like all the other girls? Why did I have to be me? How did I get this way? I wasn't always this ugly this diseased. Where did I go wrong? When did everything get so cloudy? 


	30. Chapter 30

**Gemma**

The minute I walked into the family dining hall I saw mum staring at me criticizing me with her eyes.

" _Gemma sweetheart good morning you look well"_

Smiling I sat down by my mum while our servants sat down bowels of grapefruit in front of me. Dad was on his mobile already talking business while my younger sister Gwendolyn was reading she's only ten but she's a genius who takes year eight classes.

" _Gemma how is everything going with Liam?"_

" _F_ _ine mum just fine"_

" _Sweetheart it needs to be better than fine you are already fourteen in a few years you will be out of school you need to stake your claim now a young man like Liam isn't interested in your brains which is a good thing since we know our precious Gwen got all the smarts you my dear have my youthful delicate waist my glowing clear face._ _S_ _o use what god and my graceful genes gave you hook in Prince Liam you are destined for that throne._ _A_ _ll the years I have spent being a lady in waiting to that bitch I mean queen Helena it will pay off, you will be Liam's wife do you understand that Gemma?"_

" _Yes Mum but I don't know what else I am suppose to do I can't force Liam into liking me"_

" _You can and you will use whatever whoever you have to just to get what you want"_ I reached for a croissant but mum knocked it out of my hand " _Genes will only take you so far darling you have to work for beauty your getting a little pudgy dear lay off the bread, losing twenty pounds wouldn't hurt Liam can't refuses this"_

She patted my hips handing me a water bottle. " _Hit the gym after school I will call Claude and have him schedule a private workout session"_

" _Gemma"_ My dad's voice boomed out " _How is school going? Have you fit in yet? Found what your good at?" "Not yet Dad but I will it's only a few days into school"_

" _Well Gemma you better fit in because you got kicked out of Queen Victoria's, Haarrow to name a few you're getting a reputation that will simply not do darling not if you are to be the next in line for the queen"_

" _Mum how do you even figure Liam will be king he's second in line"_

" _Things happen to Royal children all the time Kids die military accidents happen Robert's safety isn't 100% one must be ready at all times to assume thy throne and thy royal duties now off you go Gemma and for god sakes find something you can use and use it"_

" _Find his weakness Gemma boys always have one"_

" _Thanks Gwen"_

I muttered as I got up

" _I could tell you Liam's"_

" _How would you know that you barely know him"_

" _True but I am a genius and I read people Liam cares about his family, use Leni's issues and she has many the girls a train wreck and make her bleed than pretend to give a damn help her make sure Liam sees you doing it"_

" _Gwen that sounds great if this was a Disney movie but this is reality and you are just a kid you know nothing I know what I need to do and I am doing it"_

" _Gemma"_

" _Yes mum!"_

I was growing frustrated and annoyed now. Grabbing my bag I stood up as she threw something at me which crinkled in my hands. " _Don't relay on your wits sweetie were not all blessed with both_ _if all else fails use this"_ What was it?

Whatever it was it was wrapped in a sliver package heading out I saw the package said lifestyles lubricant "premium lubricated latex condoms" What did my mum just seriously give me a condom? I'm barely 14 groaning I shoved it into my bag hurrying out. 


	31. Chapter 31

**Eleanor**

" _Hey the losers back!"_

Those were the first words I was greeted with when I walked into class the day didn't get any better after that. Kids tripping me knocking my books out of my hands grabbing my book bag throwing to other kids in the hall. I couldn't get it no matter how I jumped who I went after. I heard kids calling me a cry baby a fat loser an ugly bitch. I was shoved down steps by kid after kid into lockers names were hurled at me. Damian tried to help me but nothing worked as the minutes passed I became more and more depressed.

" _Leni since were partners for History class when should we get together?"_

" _Why don't you come over tonight Kit I'll text you a time"_

" _Sounds great"_

Kit kissed my check as Damian took my hand leading me down the hall going towards the locker room. " _Leni I don't want to pressure you"_

I took a deep breath so don't I thought but didn't voice it.

"I _know you only asked me to get out of dating that prince from turkey but I really like you I was hoping that after Saturday maybe you would like to see each other for real like a real date"_

" _I know I am not rich_

" _I can't buy you all the material things but I do care about you"_

" _I promise I can give you a 100% of my time I'll do anything to make you happy._

" _So would you consider going on a date with me?"_

He must be so nervous but he wasn't showing it he was holding my hand staring into my eyes as I leaned against a wall, all around me boys and girls were holding hands some kissing some cuddling it just looked so normal. Girls were squealing as boys asked them out yet I felt nothing. Why? He was counting on me to answer how could I say No? He was so sweet and he was my date for tomorrow.

" _Of course Damian it would be my honor"_

Damian grinned leaning in to kiss me on my lips just as coach thunderstorm blew a whistle. Hurrying away before he got caught he winked at me. I went inside how could I do this to him it was wrong wasn't it?

" _Hey Leni"_

Looking over I saw Gemma come up by me

" _Hi Gemma"_

" _Hey baby girl how's the eye?"_

" _Still hurting like mad but the makeup you gave me is working no one even notices thanks for the tip"_

" _Sure Len looks like your hands are full let me help"_

She took my book bag from my hands. " _Thanks mind putting them in my locker? I have to pee again" "Sure Leni no problem"_ Why was she being so nice to me? I mean we've never been enemies but we've never really gotten on either. Coming out of the bog I saw the room had filled up great the hell would soon start. Slowly I moved to my locker to change there was only a few minutes before I was due in class. I barely had clothes off my locker open when someone pushed me out of the way landing hard with a thud. I looked up seeing Courtney and her druids were back.

" _Lets see what Leni the loser has in her locker"_

They started pulling out items from my locker, books, leather jacket, panties, my bra, my diary, tears filed up please don't read it, Courtney's eyes filled with delight.

" _Oh look what we have here!"_

" _No please don't"_

" _Aw look at the wittle loser about to cry"_

" _Hey Courtney why don't we read what this little slut has to say"_

" _I'm not a slut"_

One of her druids kicked me in my stomach laughing " _Oh Courtney I think we found something better" "What's better than hearing her inner pathetic thoughts?" "Seeing proof right in front"_ My eyes widened as I saw one of her druids holding up a sliver package what the hell was that? Tearing it open they started laughing holding it up in front of everyone who started laughing and whispering. " _Looks like she's giving Damian a little thank you see told everyone she was a slut"_

" _Knock it off I told you before what would happen to you if you didn't leave Len alone"_

Gemma glared at them coming over ripping the package out of their hands as she shoved Courtney back so hard she lost her balance and fell crashing into the locker. Courtney looked at her as shocked as I was feeling. Gemma's eyes held their gaze as she hissed.

" _Out"_

The girls ran quickly as Gemma the only one left hurries over taking my hand, why would she defend me? She and I have never been great friends was she using me to get to Liam?

I didn't want to accept her help but I was so shaken I couldn't stand by myself. Her strength helped me stand up once she pulled me up she quickly pulled me into a hug. " _Leni it all happened so fast I'm sorry I just froze are you okay?" "I should of reacted sooner"_ Am I okay what kind of question was that? Of course I wasn't I wanted to die! I didn't say any of it though I just tried to control my breathing

I felt like I was going to pass out though. Rubbing my back she took my hand leading me into the bathroom, she cleaned the tears away holding me. " _Leni you have to get some balls you have to stand up for yourself they will keep doing this if you don't"_

" _How? How can I stand up to them?_

" _What would your mum or the grand dutches do?"_

" _What would your dad say?"_

" _Think about these things Leni now pull yourself together we have a class to master"_

Gemma kept her arm around my shoulders as we walked out to the studio staying by me as we walked to the barre to stretch. She kept rubbing my back as I tried not to vomit. Ms. Playfair came in clapping her hands. " _Today we shall be focusing on warm ups I want everyone in groups which I shall assign"_

She started yelling out names my heart pounded when I heard " _Kit. Byran, Gemma, Jake, Courtney, Princess Eleanor"_ Seriously why did she hate me? Why did God hate me? Groaning I went over to the corner where Courtney her boyfriend Bryan Matthews, Gemma, Jake, Kit were standing Kit looked as uncomfortable as I felt. I felt sick again lining up across from our partners I wished with my whole heart I had Gemma or Kit but instead I stood across from Bryan his eyes filled with pleasure.

Searching the room I saw Damian and Liam in another group far across the studio neither looking this direction. Eyes closed I tried to even my breathing. Than I heard Bryan whisper.

" _You ready to get as good as you give Princess? I heard all about your after school activities Courtney told me all about the condom well don't worry slut I'm ready for you"_

I saw him grab at his private laughing I heard Courtney snicker saw Gemma look away only Kit seemed mad but his looks of pity just made me feel sicker. " _Okay class now listen up we will start with_ _the girl_ _s_ _pushed off balance by the boy_ _s_ _, then pushed back onto balance. This can be given on flat, on demi-pointe, and en pointe, until the idea of what "off" feels like in distinction from on. Let her go right, and center, and left and center, pull back and center, then forward and center."_

Was she kidding me I was suppose to trust him? I got into demi-pointe position feeling my whole body shake as I felt him slide his hands on my waist. The music began so I did as well in slow cinne turns like she was instructing yelling at us to hold our position to stay strong as the boys pushed us off balance my legs were burning as his hands not so gently pushed me

" _Your weak Eleanor what's the matter too much time on your knees? You need so much work you'll never make it as a dancer slut"_

Bryan pushed me hard my legs shook but I stayed strong trying to breathe he reluctantly pushed me back to center. Breathing out I willed myself to stay strong as I kept turning we kept doing this but his pushes got harder each time, making my muscles sore until it happened. I fell flat on my face everyone started laughing staring at me like I was a disgrace " _Miss. Henstridge if you can't_ _ke_ _ep up feel free to leave"_ Quickly I pulled myself up brushing off resuming position not saying a word. She nodded going down the line Bryan snickered

" _Think I gave it to you hard now wait till later slut"_

Inside I was shaking feeling sick.

" _Next class we shall do some_ _develope promenade_ _with thee boys spotting thee girls hold their legs up while they balance than slowly let go so they must balance on their own"_

I started slowly arms out in 5th position as I stood on my left leg my right one going slowly up feeling Bryan holding it as I lifted high back not seeing what he was doing. I held strong my leg only shaking slightly than suddenly he grabbed my leg yanking on it so hard I fell down in a heap. Head banging against the hard wood floor. " _Klutz get your lazy arse up stop slacking, Ms. Playfair Eleanor is laying down in class guess thee little princess needs her nap time"_ Everyone was laughing as my face burned Gemma looked around uncomfortable Kit's hands were clenched " _That's not what happened Mathews and you know it stop being a bully" "Stop being a fagot you little pansy" "Enough boys Eleanor are you okay?"_ I looked at her face she didn't seem one bit concerned just annoyed letting out a deep breath I nodded as Kit helped me up. In truth my leg was pounding my head and neck hurt but I shook it out.

Next she had us practice lifts she really did have it out for me didn't she? Bryan was loving this he slowly lifted me up his hands on my stomach _"_ _Ms. Playfair I think you need to talk to some of these cows about going on a diet after all girls are suppose to be thin delicate Eleanor must weigh about 200lbs"_ My face burned my whole body shook " _Hey Matthews why don't you shut your mouth or I swear I will shut it for you!"_ I heard Liam's voice filled with anger " _Enough boys Mr. Matthews if you can't lift your partner than I highly suggest some after school weight training boys must be able to lift partners of all sizes, height it is their jobs as dancers" "Cow"_

He whispered " _Pigs like you should be slaughtered"_ I was amazed he didn't drop me but than we went on to three changements the first two not lifted the third lifted on the third he moved too fast I lost my balance and fell again, this time he slammed his foot into my back " _Get up slut"_ I tried but his foot held me down I struggled my arms burning my face stinging tears falling. " _Knock it off Bryan" "Gemma mind your business"_ Courtney yells out _"Look the crybaby is crying again! What a wuss get up bitch!"_ I struggle but it's no use tears fall as the laughter rises my breathing is hysterical I can't get air I feel like I am going to pass out. Suddenly air rushes into my lungs I feel Gemma lift me up as I hear shouting she pulls me to my bum holding me in her arms. I vaguely see through my tears Liam has Bryan pinned against the mirror which is cracked now glass shattered everywhere he's pissed punching him screaming and Damian is right by him

" _I'll kill you you son of a bitch! You think it's funny to hurt a girl! To call her names you bastard no one calls my sister a slut"_

Marcus and Jack are there in seconds pulling Damian and Liam back. I've never seen my brother so mad in his life his face is beat red blood is on his fists his hair is a mess, Marcus is struggling to hold him back pulling him but Liam is on fire getting free going over to punch Bryan as his friends help him back up Liam was on him in seconds. Punching him over and over twisting his arm " _Say your sorry you pathetic piece of shit hitting a girl your the lowest of scum say it!"_

" _I'm sorry your sister is a slut!" But I bet Damian likes it I bet he gets it real"_

Damian's fist pounded Bryan's face blood poured from Bryan's lipsMarcus and Jack made quick work of pulling them off as Security came running into the studio. Everything was kind of a blur as Gemma and Unity helped me up pulling me into the locker room toclean me up.

I felt Gemma hold a cool towel against my pounding head. Unity left us alone while Gemma helped me change everything was spinning.

" _T_ _ake these they will help center you"_

" _What are they?"_

" _Just something to help you focus"_

" _I can't take these"_

" _Oh don't be so uptight Leni their not crack just a little pick me up"_

" _No I don't mean I won't I mean I feel so sick I could never get it down"_

" _So vomit"_

" _I can't seem to do that right now either"_

" _Need a little help easy stick your finger down your throat I do it all the time when I eat too much it gets easier you'll feel better and you lose weight so it's a win win_ "

I stared at her was she serious? She looked it; sighing I figured what the hell could I lose? Going into the stall I dropped to my knees. I couldn't believe it had come to this. My breathing was labored my head pounding how screwed up was I? My father would be so ashamed of me but than again what else was new? Didn't my mum just say this morning I needed to be fit? To watch my weight, well if this could make me feel better and help me maybe Gemma was right a win win. Sticking a finger down my throat I gagged

" _G_ _o further don't worry you won't choke or hurt yourself just wait till_ _you feel yourself vomiting than pull out it won't happen right away"_

There's no feeling worse than being on your knees trying to make yourself puke but every voice rang through my head " _Your a loser, your fat, lose some weight, you'll never measure up to your family's name, you'll never be good enough to represent the monarchy._ " I felt my throat burning as it contracted gagging. I pushed my finger down further than added another one my stomach hurt and screamed at me than suddenly everything came up pulling my fingers out I chocked as I coughed heaving gagging till the bowel was filled with nasty colored foul tasting liquid.

Coming out I saw Gemma looking nervous yet a small smile was on her lips but I was shaking hard she came over wrapped a hoodie around me.

" _Darling it'll get easier each time"_

" _You've done this before Gemma?"_

" _Of course what girl hasn't?"_

I haven't I thought to myself but she seemed to play it off as something that was no big deal. Maybe it wasn't cleaning myself up I stared at the pills in my hand. " _Take them don't take them it's your choice Len" "You need to focus though there's so much in your life going on right now you have this awesome opportunity here at this amazing school trust me they don't take just anybody here you have to be someone special with insane talent but you also have to work your arse off._

" _I know my family has been benefactors to this school for years we've seen some of the most amazing talent come from here. I was trained by several of the top students in dance" "Plus you have your family putting all kinds of pressure on you, the public expects you to be perfect but your not you never will be but you can act the part that means getting your shit together"_

I stared at her through the mirror maybe she was right what could one hurt? Taking a deep breath I looked at the little white pill than shoved it in my mouth taking a drink of water. " _No worries Leni Ritalin is perfectly safe it'll help you calm down stay focused and do better now let's get some makeup on you nothing your mum will even notice"_

" _Thanks Gemma why are you being so nice?" "Easy cause I want to be your brother's number one girl I mean besides you babe so someday we will be sister in laws we might as well like each other"_ I sensed there was more she wasn't telling but it wasn't up to me to push her.

The rest of the day was just as brutal I walked into History to find we had an assignment we had to pick a parent and describe what their job entailed what their day is like what how their decisions change lives or effect others. Than they started talking about how one choice can change a life so they showed a video of my dad's speech from earlier in the day where he was talking about the new referendum that would allow the people to vote if gay marriage should be legal. Dad had given a speech that everyone should be treated equally and have the same rights even if not everyone agreed with their choice of life-styles, when asked if he approved he declined to comment my heart sank. I knew my dad well enough if he really supported that life style he would stand proud for it.

" _See Fag even the king thinks being a homo is wrong if he says it is than it must be right so your wrong in every way"_

Jordan Mitchell kicked Kit's chair " _Even the king hates queers"_ Swallowing I tried not to get sick did my dad really think gays were sick that we were immoral? I couldn't breath again. I could hear my teacher talking about how part of this assignment was to monitor how this referendum changed peoples lives how it got people feeling talking. So far I wasn't liking what I was hearing Kit was sitting stiff his hands clenched so tight they were white. Kids were throwing spitballs at him hitting the back of his head taunting him yet the teacher saw it and did nothing.

" _The king hates gays so does god why don't you do us all a favor go kill yourself save us all from this stupid voting shit"_

"Go kill yourself well wasn't that a nice comment to end your day on. It wasn't even directed at me yet my heart hurt for Kit he said nothing just got up at the bell walking out his head held down.


	32. Chapter 32

**Damian**

" _I told you Damian I told you those damn Royals were nothing but trouble!" "See what happens when you get involved with those money grubbing whore's!"_

Switching from one foot to the other I tried to keep my cool but she had been yelling non stop slamming things for the last hour since we came home she had been called into the school having to take time off of work just so she could get a lecture about how disrespectful her son was. I was suspended for a week ordered to pay for any damages. It was b.s he started it and yet he walked away scout free.

" _Are you listing to me? You're never going to be allowed to see that little bitch ever again do you understand me!"_

" _She's not a bitch mum you don't even know her! Eleanor is really sweet she works really hard she's talented smart funny"_

" _She's one of them! She's not your equal Damian stay away from her."_

" _You taught me to stand up for what I believe mum and I know that what that jerk was doing was wrong he was hurting her,"_

" _That's her battle Damian she's a bloody royal she has all the money in the world she can solve her own issues stay out of it stay away from her she's rotten to the core just like her damn mother"_

" _What do you even know about her mum? I met her mum she's a sweetheart just like Leni I stand by my friends right now she needs a friend so I need to be there"_

" _Need Damian you need a roof over your head food on your table money in your pocket you want these things than stay away from her or I swear you will find yourself homeless penniless on the damn cold streets"_

Storming up the steps I was seething if she thought for one minute she was going to keep me away from Leni when she needed me she had some serious issues. Texting Lavina I felt myself shaking. I needed help if I was going to pull this off. I hoped Lavina could help me. Why was my mum so hateful towards them? What did she have against the queen? Should I listen to her? Texting Unity and Kit I waited hoping someone would reply. She had to be hiding something but what was it?


	33. Chapter 33

**Eleanor**

" _Didn't think I would see you again Princess"_

The twinkle in her eyes as I stopped punching the body bag was impossible not to notice. Breathing hard I stopped shaking out my shoulders which were ridden with tension.

" _Why not did you think you scared me off?"_

" _You sure seemed scared but I give you credit you think you can handle me"_

" _Little cocky aren't you?"_

" _No babe I thought you figured it out it ain't the D I am after"_

Her voice was so low but full of seduction. I felt my whole body tingle as she leaned closer to me her eyes seemed to scan my body. My face flushed as I squirmed her hands grabbed mine suddenly positioning them in a different angle. " _When you punch it_ _is extremely important that you align the first two knuckles in your hand with the bones in your forearm for maximum structure so you don't hurt yourself."_ She moved my hips her hands touching my bare skin since I didn't have a gis on yet shivering I tried to keep my racing heart calm. I could smell her sweet scent making me weak. _"Y_ _ou should throw any punches so that your arms stay level with your shoulders. If you have your chin down and the punch comes out straight, the shoulder will rise automatically and further protect your chin."_ I moved slowly she moved with me _._

After twenty minutes she grabbed my hands taking off my gloves telling me to shake it out " _Let's go babe"_ Taking me outside we started running why were we outside I had no idea but the fresh air did me good. For the first thirty minutes we didn't talk just ran at an even pace stopping after thirty minutes we sat on a bench. I couldn't believe how out of breath I was. Looking at her I saw she had switched her hair again now it was shaved on the right side and hung to the left in black waves with blue, green highlights. What was she thinking? Why had she kissed me? Why did she give me that drink? Was this a game to her? " _Was that your first time drinking?"_ her question caught me by surprise I felt myself panicking should I answer truthfully and tell her I had drank when I was 12 with Liam actually drink is being used loosely we got wasted. Did that make me look horrible? What if I told her I hadn't would she think I was being immature?

My nerves were at full force leaning my head back I practiced my deep breathing. " _Lexi what was that about?"_ She played innocent batting her eyelashes smiling

" _Whatever do you mean?"_

" _The kiss why would you kiss me? What gave you the idea that I wanted it?_ "

' _What gives you the idea you didn't Leni?"_

I was speechless shocked than she leaned in pulling me to her kissing me this time I was quick to push her off jumping back almost falling off the bench. " _I'm not.. I don't.._ She was even quicker than me jumping up grabbing me but I shock her off who did she think she was?

" _Leni I know who you are and I love everything about you"_

" _You don't know me at all we barely met a few days ago you know what you read that's not the real me I'm not like that"_

" _Like what?"_

" _A freak a sick diseased_ _abomination I'll never be like that!_ _I have a boyfriend we kiss we touch I love being with him"_

" _It's just a cover to protect yourself"_

I took off but she ran after me. " _Leni you can't be afraid to be honest with yourself it's okay to be proud"_ I stopped spinning around she crashed into me pushing her back I felt myself shaking. _"Proud? Are you kidding me? I would never be proud to be like that! No one should it's wrong! It's a sin!"_

" _No Leni it's beautiful it's love simple and pure"_

" _Love now your saying you love me?" "You can't love me you don't know me"_

" _Leni I know enough to know you are special you are unique just like a unicorn your capable of amazing things in your life I want to be apart of that journey. I know your scared it's okay to be scared but don't run from the fear fly to it fly above it"_

" _Your insane Lexi you have no idea what my life is like I can't just do anything I like be anyone I like I have standards. I have a whole monarchy to uphold"_

" _No Leni the only one you owe anything to is yourself" S_ haking my head I pulled my hand away running; This time she didn't follow _"I'll wait for you my little unicorn remember me"_


	34. Chapter 34

**Eleanor**

Rachael's voice echoed in my head as I fought against the nerves " _The queen has picked out one of the most exquisite gowns for you to wear it costs more than most people have in their bank accounts Eleanor you will look like a princess should proper,, delicate, sophisticated, graceful everything you are not"_ Did she really just say that? I stared back at her through the mirror of the vanity where Sabrina was doing my hair did she see through me? Did she see the ugliness inside of me?

" _Don't listen to her Eleanor you are beautiful she's just jealous"_

" _Jealously Sabrina why would I be jealous of Eleanor she is merely a kid simply put Eleanor is a pawn in my hands. I do what the queen wants with her little brat until she's old enough to be out than I will be the queen's number one. I suggest you do what you are paid for and stop making guesses the queen wants her hair up in a French pile" "Her makeup is to be sweet simple"_

Liam and I met at the top of the grand staircase holding hands he looked so handsome kissing my check he smiled at me checking me out. Descending down the marvelous staircase to the applause. I held my breath seeing the room filled with dignitaries, celebrities Gemma stood with her family little sister Gwen her brother Ronan who goes to a boarding school and is only home for special occasions. Damian and Lavina were on the other side of the room once we reached the last step Damian and Gemma both stepped up on my side and Liam's. If this wasn't awkward enough mum demanded we step up to take pictures. Why couldn't we get this over with? This damn crown was so heavy it was itching my head. Damian was pressed against me as we were forced to smile while all the paparazzi who were elite enough to grant access inside all took pictures and asked stupid questions.

" _Are you and Damian a couple?"_

" _Gemma how do you keep a prince happy there are so many girls to chose from why you?"_

" _Simple Sir I have something no other girls have the brains and the beauty to know how to navigate this world"_

" _Eleanor are you and Damian official?"_ What gave them the right to ask some of these questions?

" _You look beautiful Len"_ Damian whispered in my ear as we rode in a horse drawn carriage while the guards band played. It's unreal how many people turn up for this I mean a millions line the streets throwing roses at us yelling out. " _Long live the prince, princess"_ We waved out to the crowd but I felt silly so insignificant. Reporters were everywhere trying for a close up. My dad and mum were the first to get out surrounded by security Ted right by their side, the crowd went wild as they stepped up to the podium. You could probably hear the crowd chanting miles away " _God save the queen!" "Long live the king!"_ Next was Robert which caused thousands of teen girls to scream a few to faint security became tighter as girls tried to rush to him. He smiled blowing kisses out as him and his guard went up standing next to our dad taking a deep breath I stood up with Liam " _This is all so..._ Damian searched for the words as we listened to the band marching up and down " _Over the top ridiculous, excessive"_

I supplied some for him he chuckled helping me down from the carriage up the aisle and steps leading to the stage. Greeting the most elite of the dignitaries I smiled at the crowd as I heard shouts of " _Happy Birthday Princess!" "Long live our beautiful princess!"_ Blowing kisses out like Robert bending down to hug the youngest kids closest to the stage.

Standing next to my mum I once again felt small she was just so elegant she really lived for the applause. I felt myself stiffen up she looked so tall so proper I tried to look just like her, watching the guards pause for the troop of color. " _Someday I will join the military to"_ Robert whispered to me a cold shiver went down my spine " _It's so cool how they handle those guns"_ I heard Gemma whisper to Liam " _I promise you Liam I can handle your gun better than any old military officer"_ Liam almost chocked as he tired to stay stiff but Gemma's wandering hand along his bum made it almost impossible. Mum was so busy looking at Robert with a look of happiness she didn't notice but I saw a flicker of unease in her eyes as he talked about his dreams of being in the military, dad's eyes were only on the people.

After the cannons the gun salutes Liam and I were asked to step up and say a few words which were scripted for us. Than Gemma and Damian stepped up presenting us with the Sovereign flags which were heavy as hell but I knew better than to drop it. Paparazzi snapped pictures of us. Later after the questions the band stopped we took seats in a special reserved section. Leaning against Damian I watched the concert which started pop stars Lady Gaga, Ariana Kelly and Taken London one of the hottest teen boy bands around.

" _Their drummer is sick man I wish I could drum like him" "Your awesome Damian don't doubt yourself"_

Everyone seemed to be having a fantastic time the younger audience were dancing as Lady Gaga preformed her hit songs poker face, just dance, applause, Born this way. Than Ariana preformed Right way wrong day, ready set fame, read my mind, Taken London made all the girls scream, faint. The finale was all three coming together for an epic firework extravaganza. The lead singer of Taken London Austin Tokay danced down the aisle coming to our reserved section along with Ariana they grabbed Liam and I who were holding hands with Gemma and Damian dancing down the aisle clapping and swaying our hips. Gemma and I were all smiles as Austin, Lonny Daniels, Payton Mark, danced with us the cheers were amazing as we got to dance with their backup dancers, I felt at home on stage in this environment the crowd screaming for me as I was in sync with all the moves it was heavenly.

I let everything go as I lost myself to the music closing my eyes I just felt at home leaping spinning sliding grabbing hands with the other dancers, all time seemed to stand still as I came to the end standing on the stage, looking out as I saw the faces of little girls screaming crying reaching out pride beaming on their faces. Breathing slightly heavier than before I smiled as Payton handed me a mic. I knew in that moment no matter what happened. I'll always look back this memory will last for eternity. My voice surprised me it didn't shake I didn't even feel nervous as I sung the last of the song along with the crowd.

 _Everyone wants that special feeling_

 _The one where you just know without seeing_

 _With just believing you can't deny the joy_

 _When I hear the words you say to me I know in my heart they are as true as my heart's beat_

 _I know now I will stop at nothing to change the world to make it better for the children coming after me_

 _In a world of lies I will be the truth_

 _The truth is I love you_

Without warning Damian kissed me as Gemma grabbed Liam kissing him the crowd went insane flashes blinded me the whole moment made me feel so small so vulnerable. Everyone was watching screaming crying yelling things out. Above us in the sky was written "Happy Birthday Prince Liam, Princess Eleanor" Yea this would help me in school alright not.

Inside was a lot stiffer dignities, parliament high society members. One area was roped off for our friends music played people danced. Liam and I were forced to sit in the thrones wearing the ceremonial robes crowns. I had Rachael standing by me whispering " _Sit up straighter Eleanor" "Don't slouch Smile Eleanor" "Eye contact look like you care"_ mum was joining her. All evening people were coming to us presenting us with gifts. All of which were a coy to bribe us each to represent for their cause now that we were of age to start doing publicity work.

" _Princess Eleanor on behalf of the children's society of London please accept this humble gift"_ the lady came before me curtsied as I rose Sabrina held my gown as I bent down to receive the gift Jack close by. Her eyes were filled with tears these kids had so little what could they possibly give to me? I saw the kids that had been selected to come with her dressed in their best looking nervous but eyes filled with wonder, excitement. Standing behind the velvet rope they held their breath as I descended down I took the gift giving her kisses on her checks, Mum stepped forward thanking her as she escorted her out I gave the gift to Rachael who organized it into alphabetical order. Liam was presented with gifts as well but my eyes were overwhelmed with the line forming for me the next lady that came over holding a huge painting she also curtsied to me

" _Princess Eleanor please accept this gift as a humble tribute to you it is drawn and painted by one of our finest artist who sees you as the truest of beautiful creatures"_

I thanked her smiling as I took the portrait which was beautiful a ray of colors with a unicorn standing on the edge of a cliff over looking a waterfall my breath caught how did they know I liked unicorns? On the back was the artist names Aless Cunningham A.C " _I would love to meet this young lady is she here?"_

" _No she couldn't make it but her brother is here"_

" _May I meet him ma'am?"_

She seemed shocked as she nodded looking at my mum who nodded coming to stand by me taking the portrait thanking her politely. She lead me to the area where the kids were all being held behind the rope there were a handful of kids ranging from 10- 16 " _Princess Eleanor you are so beautiful! It's an honor to meet you!"_

" _Thank you sweetheart but you are beautiful I love your curls so precious what's your name baby girl?"_

" _I'm Avery and I am ten! You really think I am pretty Princess?"_

" _Yes sweetheart you are beautiful"_

" _Oh my god thank you I've been told I am ugly everyday by my mum this is so so.._

The girl started crying hysterically panicking inside I took a deep breath looking for help mum was talking to some other ladies as she stood by Liam dad was on the other side of the room and the lady from the children's society had two other kids in need of her attention so I went over Sabrina holding my gown as I moved swiftly picking the girl up hugging her. My heart broke for her how could a mum tell her own daughter she was ugly unlovable? " _Princess Eleanor stop!" "Princess Eleanor please put her down your gown"_ I ignored Rachael rubbing the girls back as she cried thankfully a song came on that got me dancing I motioned for the rest of the kids to join me as they started cheering and clapping. Their faces were so full of astonishment joy they were squealing the floor filled up. Liam pulled Gemma to him as they started dancing Damian came by me picking up another young girl as he held my hand. Mum looked worried Ted looked pissed but hey it was my party and I would do what I wanted we started singing. I looked over and saw my dad smiling. Spinning I put the girl down as we all started letting lose Gemma grabbed a bottle of champagne popping the top which flew off spraying us with liquid as we laughed.

 _ **The Mercedes benz, Vera dress Cristal and French cigarettes**_

 _ **Pink Diamond ring from Tiffany's  
Scoring looks from the VIP's**_

 _ **Jimmy Choos or Manolo shoes Got so much, she don't know what to choose Burnin up the plastic on haute couture  
Trashin' what she don't want no more PC  
Livin' through the pages of a magazine The pictures tell her who she should be The latest craze, the hottest things Fallin for it all to meet her unmet needs**_

 _ **Its Never Enough, Never enough  
She WANTs more more more more  
Keep it comin cuz its Never enough,  
She WANTS more more more  
She thinks she's got more class then anyone else  
Judging everybody by what's on their shelves, yeah  
Never enough, Never enough  
She NEEDS more more more more more**_

 _ **The BMW, Versace suits Italian shoes from 5th Avenue Mega Yacht on a private dock  
Blue label Scotch 1000 bucks a pop**_

 _ **South Beach Bars, Cuban cigars  
Hot bikini girls hangin' on his arm  
Cashin in the chips to party all night  
Spendin all his money with no end in sight  
Livin life through the silver screen He plays the part of who he wants to be The hottest clubs, the latest scenes Falling for it all to keep his fantasy**_

 _ **Its Never Enough, Never enough  
He Wants more more more more  
Keep it comin cuz its Never enough,  
He WANTS more more more  
He Thinks he's got more class then anyone else  
Judging everybody by what's on their shelves, yeah  
Its Never enough, Never enough  
He NEEDS more more more more more**_

 _ **Never satisfied with what we have,  
Tryin to buy a happiness that lasts  
We're just hidin behind a mask  
Oh your'e so much better than that...  
We just need more more more more more MORE LOVE!**_

 _ **Its Never Enough, Never enough, We want more more more more  
Keep it comin cuz its never enough, We want more more more  
Ya Know we got more class than what's on our shelves  
Lets stop judging Everybody and start lovin ourselves  
Its Never Enough, Never enough, We Need more more more more more  
More Love, never enough, Never Enough... **_

I eyed Gemma this fit her to the core she didn't seem to care that she had all the money she could ever ask for she wouldn't stop till she had the crown to kind of like my uncle who was in the back harassing one of the maids who looked terrified. As I looked around listing to the song I couldn't help but feel it really was made for us. I suddenly felt so sad my family seemed so far away I didn't understand my uncle's lust for the throne the way he glared at my dad made me afraid, suddenly I felt my dad by me smiling at me as he took my hand leading me to the center of the floor as the music stopped. " _Everyone I want to thank you all for coming tonight to celebrate the birth of my two precious children who_ _a_ _re now young men, woman of Great Britain to wrap up tonight's festivities I want to extend the invite to all dad's and daughters mums and sons to have the last dance"_

Dad took my hand as Mum took Liam's holding his hands I felt safe loved as I listened to the words.

 _ **You think I'm strong, you think I'm fearless  
Even when I'm, I'm at my weakest  
You always see the best in me when I can't  
I wanna be the girl you think I am**_

 _ **I got my flaws and I've got regrets  
And I know there's more on the road ahead  
When I wonder if I'll ever measure up  
Oh, I thank God for a father's love**_

 _ **Cause you think I'm brave, and you think I'm beautiful  
You think that I can do the impossible  
You always see the best in me when I can't  
I wanna be the girl you think I am**_

 _ **Oh, whoa  
Oh, whoa  
The girl you think I am, yeah  
Ooh  
Ooh, yeah **_

The way my dad was looking at me as I leaned against his chest I felt strong I felt beautiful but my dad wasn't seeing inside of me to the real me would he still love me?

 **{A/N The lyrics to Never Enough belong to the respected artist and record company** Michelle Lockey you can hear this awesome song here watch?v=AOOdhZl-wH8}

The lyrics to The Girl You Think I am belong to Carrie Underwood, David Hodges Lindsey.


	35. Chapter 35

**Eleanor**

" _Okay listen up everyone"_

Mrs. Ruska clapped her hands calling all of us in rep practice to form a straight single line. Pacing back and forth she looked each of us in our eyes as we stood erect barley breathing.

" _I know these last few weeks have been exhausted emotionally as well as physically but I also know that you are thee best of thee best dancers in this school so you are expected to handle thee pressure as only thee best of thee best can. The next few weeks will only be crazier more demanding if you can't handle thee pressure thee door is that way"_

" _Now this week alone we have two performances both will require six dancers look around there's 12 of you do the math six will be eliminated, todays practice will decided who will be in those performances so dance as if your life your career is riding on this… who knows it may just be"_

She wasn't kidding about how crazy everything was. Every night I seemed to have six to seven pages of essays, assigned reading questions and answers. I was starting to get overwhelmed with everything. I hadn't slept in weeks Gemma's pills were only helping me so much. After school I had rep practice for two hours at least than I had meetings with mum every night different ones ones from children's hospitals planning gala's; church meetings discussing topics like abortion, planned parenthood, poverty and how to create jobs, foreign aid. To lgbtq issues any of these meetings required traveling which left me and mum a lot of one and one time. We flew to Russia where she took me out to a fancy restaurant fed me black ykra which was basically S **almon caviar. "** ** _Salty but tasty"_** **"** ** _It takes a real woman to be able to eat this dish" "So does that mean I am a real woman than Mummy?"_** **Her laughter was delightful as she softly kissed my forehead ruffling my hair than fixing it again. "** ** _You are turning into a beautiful strong young woman but you are still my little girl Eleanor you have a while before your fully a real woman I want you to stay young baby don't rush growing up"_**

 **After dinner we walked around the capital** **of Russia Moscow which was beautiful we got a tour of Moscow State University which was amazing huge and gleamed in gold. "** ** _Keep your options open sweetheart your smart you have a bright future you can go to any university you want my love"_** **I got to interview students there recording them. Than we visited Spasskaya clocktower, Cathedral of Christ the Saviour, MIBC; Alexander Pushkin Statue at the Tverskoy Boulevard; Saint Basils Cathedral and Moscow Kremlin. While we were at the Cathedral of Christ the Saviour Rachael, Mum and myself met with the head priest Father Abarnikov who was seeking my mum's opinion on how to** **change the church to be more accepting to the cultural diversion currently taking place.**

 **"** ** _My radiant beautiful Queen thank you for coming here today to take the time to meet with me, I am afraid time is off the essences_** ** _time is changing fast there are more and more young people coming out as homosexual each day they face the reality of being prosecuted condemned even killed for just being themselves public opinion is growing more hostile each day we need to make a stand we need to show people that love is love and should know no gender England has been leading the way into accepting I know that is much to do with you my queen"_**

 **" _Well thank you father_** ** _Abarnikov_** ** _I do believe in equal rights to all I also know youth is a precarious time in finding who you are what you stand for you shouldn't have to worry about being prosecuted shamed" "It's up to us to give these young people a voice"_**

 **" _Princess Eleanor it would be amazing if you would give your input as well after all you are youth"_**

 **" _Me?"_**

 **I looked to mum than back to him both nodded. "** ** _The rest of the delicates shall be here shortly Princess why don't you take a few minutes to prepare a speech for yourself" "Thank you Sir'" "Thank you Princess it would be an honor to have you speak my assistant Debbie will show you to a private room" "Rachael please accompany Eleanor I shall be fine here" "Are you sure my queen?" "Yes Rachel I am thank you"_**

 **To say I was nervous would be an understatement. His assistant didn't say a word but I felt Rachael's hand on my shoulder she nodded to me as we were shown to a room. Leaving us alone I thought about how hard it was to live with this secret.** **I felt like a freak how could I like girls? It just wasn't normal "** ** _Any idea what you will say Eleanor?" "No Rachael I have no idea I wasn't excepting any of this" "_** ** _J_** ** _ust follow your Mums lead she's an excellent leader"_**

 **What would people think if I stood up and spoke on behalf of lgbt teens would they assume I was one of them? Wasn't I? No I wasn't if I never admitted it out loud it wouldn't be true.**

 **"** ** _Oh my god Princess Eleanor?"_**

 **I turned to see two young woman around 16 standing before me.**

 **"** ** _Yes I am how may I help you?"_**

 **" _Hi.. I ..wow..so sorry I …_**

 **She started fanning herself Rachel went over to her "** ** _Sweetheart it's okay you can ca_** ** _l_** ** _m down she's an ordinary girl like you"_**

 **" _No way she's thee princess of england she has the power to do so much for us you have to speak on our behalf please"_**

 **" _Excuse me but this is a restricted area only thee princess is allowed in here"_**

 **" _I'm sorry but I have to speak up"_**

 **The other young woman spoke rushing past to Rachel to reach me. I jumped back in fright you never know what fans would do. "** ** _My name is_** ** _Katina Volova this is my twin sister_** ** _Gabriella_** ** _she was beaten by her classmates three months ago stoned for being openly gay yet she is proud of who she is she is taking a stand because of this our government has been threating jail time if she doesn't keep her mouth shut she needs help"_** **I was left dumbfounded was it a crime to be gay? Looking at Rachel feeling myself shake I had no idea what to say.**

 **"** ** _I'm so sorry for what you have been going through but I still don't get how I can help"_**

 **" _You are thee princess are you no?"_**

 **" _Yes but not of this country"_**

 **" _No but none thee less Princess millions of young people look to you as our leader if you say you support gay rights it will go a long way in perhaps changing thee minds of thee youth"_**

 **"** ** _May we talk for a minute Princess?"_**

 **Gabriella spoke softly but her voice filled with no hesitation so I nodded intrigued by what this young lady had to say taking her hand we went out to the patio.**

 **"** ** _Gabriella may I ask a question?"_**

 **" _Yes of course my princess"_**

 **" _When did you know?" "I know it's an an old question"_**

 **" _Yet it has meaning substance Princess in truth I guess I always knew in a way but I really knew about two years ago. I just always felt different but it wasn't till I kissed_** ** _my first girlfriend that I admitted it out loud, but I knew I could never tell anyone not without paying deeply" "When it did come out to my school it was the scariest moment being beaten was humiliating yet at the same time it was the most liberating moment of my life I knew that because I survived it I could do anything now"_**

 **" _How did it come out?"_**

 **" _I was with my girlfriend in a place where I thought we were alone we were kissing someone saw us took a video and sent it to everyone in school"_**

 **" _That must have been horrible"_**

 **" _It was but like I said it gave me strength I am more determined to stand up for lgbt teens even if it means I die"_** **I swallowed she was so brave I don't think I could ever do what she is doing. "** ** _How was it .. um your first kiss I mean?"_** **She laughed shrugging "** ** _Wet sloppy awkward like most first kisses but nice"_** **Swallowing against the lump in my throat** **I tried to control my breathing** **as she asked** **"** ** _Have you ever kissed a girl before?"_** **How should I respond? Answer yes even though it wasn't me kissing Lexi it was her kissing me did it count? Should I lie?**

 **" _No...But I I want to.._**

 **She smiled leaned closer within seconds her lips were on mine. They were soft sweet like one would imagine a girls lips being. My whole body felt alive as she pulled me closer her hands on my back running up and down softly. I never felt this amazing. "** ** _Princess Eleanor"_** **I jumped back as I heard Rachel's voice breathing heavy. I stared at Gabriella who grinned curtsying. I was left shaken but she grabbed my hand.**

 **"** ** _There's always fear in going against the norm but princess if you let yourself just be you may find there's more beauty than you would ever know"_**

 **Rachel came out** **lett** **ing me know it was time. Taking a deep breath I still had no clue what I was going to say but I had no time now. Walking out I saw my mum was** **lined up with the us president,**

 **R** **epresentatives from groups supporting human rights, the environment, free media.** **Motioning for me to join her I took another deep breath "** ** _Princess you seem nervous here take a drink it is vodka strong stuff it shall calm those nerves"_** **Mum laughed as I took the flask from Russian activist Vladimir Lucas nodding at me the smell was sicking but if it worked why not. Quickly I tipped my head back and swallowed the liquid was strong and burned yet it woke me up. Shaking my head I jumped a little hearing mum laugh as she patted my arm taking the flask from me "** ** _That will due my love feel better?"_** **Better was not the word I would go for but sure it took the edge off. Watching as each person stepped up to address the crowd of media personal** **gathered for the G-20 summit. It seemed to be insane people were yelling at each other calling each other names, I was set to go on next after Russian President Valkin so I paid good attention to what was being said.**

 **"** ** _President Valkin_** ** _how can you create a law that infringes on someones life?"_**

 **" _Simple I am the president I have thee right to tell people how to live their lives if they don't like it leave Russia marriage is between a man and a woman not a man and a man or a woman and woman we as Russians have a non traditional culture homosexuality is a crime and should be treated as such however we do not use capital punishment here in Russia unlike many other countries but we have passed a law that makes any public display of homosexuality a crime while we have declared it is not a mental illness in my opinion one who views themselves as a lgbt person is only kidding themselves into believing they are normal when in fact they are sick which means I have a responsibility to protect the law abiding non sick people from being infected by this disease"_** **there were so many people asking questions in different languages I was lost but at the same time I had never felt so sure about myself.**

 **My mum and I stepped up next she had her hand on my shoulder the whole time. Nodding to the press as they snapped pictures of us. She was the first to speak her voice was soft yet held conviction "** ** _Good Morning everyone and thank you for coming here on behalf of England and it's people I am here to represent for one of the greatest countries in the world we are proud to stand u_** ** _p_** ** _for all our people. I truly believe that everyone has the right to live their lives how they see fit it is not my place nor is it anyone else place to make them feel in superior devalued as a productive member of society however it is the right of each church to decide if they want to hold weddings for same sex couples. I am not here to force people to accept homosexuality as right or wrong everyone has the right to have their views but no one has the right to make someone else feel scared unsafe or judged for simply being who they are_** ** _this is simply a human rights issue someone a girl who likes girls has just as much right to marry as a girl who loves boys it's not about religious rights but civil rights that is why I along with my husband have issued for a referendum to pass a law that will allow the people to vote for same sex marriage to be passed. I urge everyone to open their minds and put yourself in the shoes of someone who is being discriminated against for simply being themselves" Now I would like to introduce my beautiful daughter Eleanor"_**

 **Taking a deep breath** **** **I** **** **stepped** **** **up further don't look at them look ahead the bright lights blinded me tears welled up from the sheer brightness but I looked to my left saw Gabriella smiling at me as I let out my breath. "** ** _Good Morning gentleman ladies thank you for taking the time to hear me out I know I am young but youth doesn't mean I am dumb or blinded to the issues p_** **l** ** _aguing our_** **society** ** _today in fact it makes me more aware of what needs to be done because of my age._** ** _D_** ** _estiny comes to pass in strange ways. I always wondered why I was born into this life I didn't chose it but maybe it chose me someone once said I had the power to make a difference._**

 ** _I never believed it but I am starting to you can start at any age 10, 3, 13, 29,45 age is merely a number what you do with your life it is up to you no matter where you were born who you were born to you can make a change it may not be huge but even a small change can effect those around you for years to come, gay, straight, bisexual, transgender, questioning we all are humans we are all unique you shouldn't have to live in fear to live in shame._**

 ** _T_** ** _eens shouldn't go to school afraid they will be beating afraid there will be no one there to help them yet this is what is happening kids are being killed in broad daylight for being who they are, teens are being driven to taking their own lives, it's not right j_** ** _ust three nights ago in St. Petersburg a 19 year old young man in the prime of his life was murdered in front of hundreds of people all because the had the audacity to hold hands with his boyfriend he was shot in the chest while people spat on him called him fagot told him he was a sin he deserved to rot in hell" this is the world we are bringing our children up in and frankly it scares the shit out of me._**

 ** _I am sickened that people feel it's okay it's right to take beer bottles and shove it up a fifteen year old boy's arse because he was brave enough to come out to his older brother his brother who he loved and trusted who than called his friends and told them about his pansy little brother the same friends that later helped him beat his brother to death after sexually assaulting his brother yet the police did nothing"_**

 **" _Another example is how just last year a gay nightclub was attacked by twenty armed men people were dragged out beating raped de-colthed and stoned in public pissed on shamed for just living their lives not hurting anyone, this has to stop no one should be forced into living their life in secret" That's why I am proposing a gay straight alliance club at all schools in England I may not be able to change laws here in Russia but I can start in my own country"_**

 **The ride back to the hotel I fell asleep on Mum's shoulder well I had fallen asleep but I awoke half way without opening my eyes, just enjoying being on Mum's arms feeling her strong heartbeat smelling her sweetness, than I heard her talking to Rachel.**

 **"** ** _Excellent job today my queen you even had me convinced that you give a damn about those freaks" "_**

 **" _Rachel that's my job as queen to make all the people feel that they belong even those who live in sin. I can never condone it but to oppose it would make me an enemy and the queen must always be ready to lead her people, besides what they do in their private lives has little baring on me as long as they like me I get to live my life let them believe I care and watch their money roll in support of me"_**

 **" _Eleanor gave quite a passionate speech"_**

 **" _She's a kid she's too dumb to know what she's saying but people bought it she's all over the news already that means more positive press for the monarchy so it's a win win for me"_** **I suddenly felt sick.**

 **"** ** _Eleano_** **r** ** _foot ou_** **t** ** _lo_** **ok** ** _at that turn_** **!** ** _Does that look right? Are you even focusing!" 1 2 3.. 4..5 6.._**

 **Mrs. Ruska's voice brought me back to the present as she kept count while the music played. Suddenly she was on me grabbing my foot twisting it it took everything in me not to cry out in pain.**

 **"** ** _Are you stupid?"_**

 **" _No Ma'am"_**

 **" _Than do what I say goddamn it"_**

 **" _Yes Ma'am"_**

 **" _You want to be a dance_** **r** ** _yes?"_**

 **"** ** _Yes ma'am"_**

 **" _Than you know great dancer require perfect technique know?"_**

 **" _Yes Ma'am"_**

 **" _Does this look like perfect technique?"_**

 **" _No Ma'am"_**

 **She hit my foot hard over and over. "** ** _Hold it high hold it steady no matter how hard I hit it"_** **My whole body ached as she hit me over and over again with a wet ballet shoe but I stayed steady even as blood dripped from my raw painful foot I didn't waver.**

 **My stubbornness paid off as I was one of the six kids picked. As I limped off the floor one of the last to leave I heard Mrs. Ruska call to me. "** ** _Eleanor" "Yes Ma'am"_** **Please no more not today I begged inside my mind everything hurt I had little sleep on the way home from Russia my mind was whirling with all the words that mum had said to Rachel. Did she really think I was stupid?**

 **"** ** _Eleanor I just want you to know I am proud of you, not just for today you proved you are a worthy dancer but for what you did for my country._** ** _T_** ** _his weekend I saw the television you spoke on behalf of LGBT youth that is not an easy thing to do for anyone but for a kid it is bravery._**

 ** _Russia is very backwards country in their beliefs it is one of many reasons I chose to leave but I have much family members there who face being beaten humiliated who are afraid and ashamed. I fear for many I love so thank you for having the courage to stand up for them" if you ever need anything do not fear to ask me yes"_**

 **I was speechless I thought she hated me but than she lifted my chin in the palm of her hand** ** _. "You are very special Eleanor you shall be iconic don't let anyone dim that light if you ever need sponsor for this club I am the teacher to ask. I have been an out and proud woman for nearly twenty years long before it was cool or safe I faced many hardships but now I am happily_** ** _with_** ** _my life long partner for ten years Sarah it is possible to be happy Eleanor it just takes time"_** **I stared at her wait did she know? How did she know?**

 **" _You do not have to say anything my dear child if you are not ready everyone has their own coming out both to themselves and to the world it is different for everyone and no one should rush you but I understand and I am here for you"_** **I was left shaken as she dismissed me was I that transparent?**


	36. Chapter 36

**Eleanor**

One thing I knew for sure was that even though I made it this time I needed to work out so I could be in shape to keep making it. So as soon as Rep rehearsals let out Kit and I had my driver drop me off at the gym we have memberships to in West London.

" _Thanks for letting me tag along Len"_

" _Not a problem thanks for helping me"_

We started with jogging around the indoor track for an hour

" _How's everything going for you?"_

" _Alright I suppose as it could I saw you on thee telly great speech you gave"_

" _Thanks I just spoke from my heart I just wish mum believed in me"_

" _Sucks when parents don't back you up doesn't it?" "_

 _Yea she lied to my face to the people's face all she cares about is the damn monarchy"_

" _What did your parents do to let you down?"_

" _Beside being generally crappy parents who don't give a damn what I do where I am or who I am with?"_

" _My parents will never accept me Len no matter how hard I pray or how I try to please them_ _to them I'll always be the gay son the one that they messed up on somehow"_

" _That's their problem than because as far as I am concerned your amazing Kit you shouldn't have to change for anyone not even them"_

After a cool down we moved to the machines first doing some abb crunches, than we did some Pile Squats with the dumb bars spotting each other switching to some power stretch lunges moving on to some bench presses push-ups doing about 30 reps of 10 sets. " _Thanks Len that's really sweet it means a lot I just kind of gotten use to being the strange freak in my family even in school I thought coming to a preforming arts school it would be more liberal but I was wrong their still as narrow minded as any school"_

We moved on to the chin assist which gave me issues " _Relax your body your too tight Len give yourself some slack breathe out than pull up slowly"_ Kit held my lower half as I pulled myself up slowly I made ten. " _Now rest for a minute_ _Len I need to use the loo I'll return"_ He jogged off as I took a drink from my water bottle.

" _I bet you would look sexy as hell if you just poured that water all over yourself"_

I almost chocked as I heard a voice from behind me my whole body froze. " _I heard your speech it was very moving but did you mean it?"_

" _Of course I meant it why wouldn't I?"_

" _People say things they mean all the time people play games they lie"_

" _How can you say you stand behind the LGBT community yet deny you are one of us?"_

Getting down from the machine I stopped in front of her she was right this wasn't easy to admit swallowing I moved closer to her. Lexi stood with one foot on a bench press wearing the sexiest gym outfit I have ever seen. Black tight stretch pants her flat stomach was tight firm on display for everyone to see thanks to her short crop top that clung to her DD breasts.

" _We all have secrets Lexi for some of us it isn't easy to reveal but your right I am hypocritical to speak so passionate about acceptance when I can not even accept myself but I am working on it one does not come easy to accept the fact she is different not when it would get her exiled from her family, friends"_

Kit returned jogging up " _Hello who might this be?" "Kit this is my friend Lexi, Lexi this is Kit were school mates" "Nice to meet you"_ They shock hands " _Len we should probably do some bench presses now" "I can spot her Kit" "Are you sure Lexi?" "Yes" "awesome cause I see some hot boys in need of some watching I mean spotting"_ Kit ran off almost gleefully I spotted where he was looking three boys around our ages with no shirts but ripped abs.

We worked for another three hours before exhaustion won over than we showered which I couldn't help but take to sneak a look. My heart fluttered as I watched her rub soap all over her delicate body. My knees felt weak " _Like what you see?" "Huh?"_ Lexi's laughter rung through the walls echoing I felt myself blush. Once we changed we met Kit outside. " _What_ _'s_ _the stalkers names?"_ She motioned to Jack and Kit's guard whatever his name was. " _Our security detail mine is Jack" "My guards name is Charlie but he doesn't speak much"_

We walked into one of the fancier restaurants in London which was darkened but had soft music playing tables lined with fancy cloths, waiters carrying towels under trays. The host sat us at a quite table in the far corner. " _This place looks rich I can't even afford the water off the menu"_

" _No worries Lexi my treat_ _for being such an arse these last few weeks" "Well you do owe me"_ She laughed touching my arm. Her touch was simple light but sent waves of happiness coursing through me. " _I'm kidding you owe me nothing everyone is entitled to come out in their own time"_ I smiled as I looked around at all the pictures each picture must cost thousands of pounds some were simple like the one of the dessert, some were of downtown London from years past a few of Paris there were ones of flowers. _"Thanks for understanding I love the one of the dessert there's a beauty in it"_ " _There's beauty in everything in life if one knows how to look for it"_ Slowly I reached out taking her hand rubbing my fingers over hers.

After a yummy dinner we walked around Hyde park for while it was already dark and close to closing time but there were still a few people cycling jogging walking dogs, the boats were all docked for the night but we stopped by Serpentine lake sitting on one of the rocks she took me in her arms while Kit ran to grab ice cream from a cart. " _I don't know how this is suppose to work Lexi I have a boyfriend yet I like you" "Do you like him?" "Yes I mean not in the same way as you but he's a good kid"_ I could feel her fingers tracing my scalp caressing my hair. " _You could break up with him" "_ _I_ _don't want to hurt him it's all so confusing I mean if I stay with him I am a liar a cheater but if I break up with him I'm a heart-breaker"_

" _Well maybe you could wait and see maybe this won't even work out we barely know each other why don't we take some time to see how this evolves no need to go breaking any hearts if this all falters although I don't think it will I am pretty certain that I will love being with you"_

I turned slowly kneeling before her as she wrapped her arms around my neck leaning down she had the most amazing eyes I had ever seen. " _I guess the only way to tell is if we seal this with a kiss" "So shut up and kiss me already you owe me that at least"_ Everything was so cloudy as to what I should do but the minute our lips connected those clouds turned to fireworks leaving those damn clouds buried behind the brilliant arrays of fireworks.


	37. Chapter 37

**Len**

The next few weeks passed by quickly each day was a balancing act waking up at four am to go for a jog through Hyde park where I would meet up with Lexi we would have an amazing run where we talked about everything from our favorite foods hers were simple things like Pizza, Salad, Pasta she loved her pasta which is why she said she spent so much time in the gym but as far as I was concerned she had an amazing figure. My favs were caviar, Salmon, general taso's chicken, pies, fruit.

We talked about our favorite music she preferred punk/ Gothic while I liked pop/ dance music, our favorite shows she liked action shows like Xena the Warrior Princess, The elephant Princess which was an Australian show. " _I see you have a thing for Princesses"_ Her smile lifted me as she leaned in and whispered " _What can I say I have an affliction for Beauty"_ Of coursethat earned her a kiss.

After our jog which usually lasted an hour I went home excised for another hour took a shower joined my family for breakfast than had school, which was crazier with each day but exhilarating we were learning so much I already learned two different acting types Method, Stanislavski, what the difference between he two were, we learned about stage acting how to approach scripts, be directed in scene work, create a character and be confident and imaginative in rehearsals.

In music I was learning more piano technique I could now play three different styles than I could before I started here. Life was a juggling course in school I held Damian's hand we kissed I played the role of his daunting girlfriend. We giggled over shared jokes, we worked closely on projects. I seemed to have him fooled but there was a part where I felt him pulling away. After school I had rep rehearsal for hours than I went to the studio to work on my martial arts where I had the sexiest smartest teacher who gave me private lessons.

By December I had risen two belts I was feeling stronger. I had learned how to use a sword, how to work with a staff. Fridays were my date nights with Damian where we went bowling, the movies had dinner, we went to games rugby, football, we cheered our hearts out I fell into his arms when our team lost where he comforted me or teased me, it always ended with a full on make out session.

Damian was always coming up with new ideas, anything from ice skating, roller blading, Miniature golf with friends or Amusement parks. Saturdays he always had to work at his mum's restaurant they seemed to be having issues so he said it would keep the peace in truth it worked out perfectly cause than on Saturdays Lexi and I had dates nights we went to the remote locations in London she always seemed to have friends in every corner who threw the funniest parties in warehouses, garages, parties on top of roofs when we weren't in the party mood we went for walks along the countryside, we took the train to Paris where we had dinner on top of the Eiffe tower we walked along the Champs-Elysées where we meet up with some of my friends, we went to parties in the fanciest of mansions and clubs.

Everything seemed to move so fast but I was learning so much about her she really was a beautiful soul she volunteered every Monday, Wednesday at two homeless shelters for LGBTQ youth. She hated flowers cause she was allergic, she loved kitties, I liked dogs but they were both adorable, she loved to garden even though it made her eyes itch, she was a great sister always helping her brothers out even though they teased her.

It was hard to find time to be together besides Saturdays so some nights I started sneaking her inside the palace through the secret tunnels to my room. I would be in so much trouble if I was ever caught showing anyone the tunnels never mind having someone over on a school night.

Still it was a risk worth taking we would sneak inside and if we didn't make it to the main palace there was a secret room in the tunnels I had set up there we would cuddle by a fire watch Xena kiss and whisper about what we wanted for our futures.

My quest to get a LGBTQ club started was hitting some snags but I wasn't quitting I went to the headmaster but that got me laughed at. So I took to the streets along with my crew Damian, Unity, Kit, Solan who was this quite kid in our acting classes who had a talent for production editing, him and Damian got along well so they took turns one would hold the camera one day while the other would be the first assistant as well as the gaffer, Unity was usually our gripper.

While Kit and I would interview the subjects we took to the streets to get public views on gay straight alliances in schools, we interviewed kids, teens parents, we asked random strangers we took to the Internet made videos reaching out to kids to get signatures videos sent in asking people to say why they thought this club was a great idea. We talked to kids, workers in LGBTQ centers. It took months but every night I was editing together material.

Exhaustion was really starting to ware on me besides all this I had performances every week with rep we traveled all over. Which was fun I got to see so many different lifestyles cultures we went all over England to different events we went to France, La, NYC, Tennessee, Chicago, Seattle in each city Kit and I would manage to sneak off and venture to their cities hottest gay clubs of course we were always disguised. I learned quickly that Kit was so talented he could master any dance style with just seeing it once also he was a true friend he never uttered a word to Damian about my other love interest. I started to see that there was so many ways to live NYC was a true eye opener so many different people living life in their own way gay, straight, bisexual, transgender in all different jobs no one cared who they were they all just lived their lives. It gave me hope someday maybe I could be like one of those people.

Still when I was home alone sitting behind a computer screen trying to compose a document that I could present to the school board meeting in a few weeks, listening to all the stories from my interviews, I felt that hope die a little. How could I feel hope when I listened to 15 year old Gabriel talk about how his own dad burned him with a fire poker when he came out to him as homosexual, how his mum threw him out instead of taking his side. How he wondered the streets for months becoming prey to all the pimps, drug dealers before he was picked up for prostitution and taken to a halfway house to detox before he could even get into a shelter.

He was a baby faced milk chocolate cutie who should have been in school playing with his mates but he was worrying about where he would lay his head down at night how he was going to eat if anybody would ever love him. For every Gab there was another story even more sad 13 year Cynthia who was beaten everyday, molested by her step-dad and brother till she ran away when she was eleven she spent only weeks on the streets before being snatched up by an older woman who promised her she would love her protect her and all she did was use her to pass drugs when she didn't make the delivery on time or if anything happened she would get beaten. She stayed for months before she got the courage to leave now she was living alone on the streets with a group of other runaway/ throwaway kids she had a partner Mindy who was 14 who had been tossed out when she came out to her parents months before.

My eyes blurred as I tried to focus on the task ahead but I had been at it for hours, Gemma's pills had no effect on me anymore. A soft knock on my door made me look up weary calling out

" _Who is it?"_

" _It's your dad darling may I come in?"_

" _Sure I could use a break"_

My dad came in grinning as he held out a slice of apple pie covered in whip cream.

" _Sweetie you need to take some time away from all this work your killing yourself"_

" _Daddy I have a deadline I need to get down but I am at a loss, as powerful as these stories are their missing something"_

He patted my couch sighing I got up going over to where he was sitting pulling me close he kissed my forehead.

" _Sweetheart you know I am proud of you but as hard as I always tell you to work for what you want I also encourage you to take time for yourself"_

" _I know daddy but some things are bigger than ourselves you taught me that"_ His laughter rung out as he ruffled my head " _Yes I did my own words biting me in my bum back, what seems to be troubling you Leni?"_

 _It's just I have all this power daddy and I can't seem to find a way to make it work to help anyone maybe Mum's right maybe I just am too stupid too young"_

" _What?"_ shit I slipped I looked up at my dad his big eyes were cast in worry now as he pulled me closer lifting my chin.

" _What did you say baby girl?"_

" _I didn't mean to say anything but when we were coming home from Russia mum told Rachel I was too dumb to know what I was fighting for that she was just using me in her game maybe she's right maybe this is too big for me to understand"_

I could see my dad tense up his facial muscles tightened as his grip on my shoulders did to. " _Listen to me darling what your mum said was wrong you are not dumb you my darling daughter are one of the brightest young ladies out there you have a vision you have ambition you just need to find some peace than you will be able to listen to your heart the answers you are seeking are there" "Right now my dear you need to eat this awesome pie and go to sleep the questions will still be there in the morning but hopefully so will thee answers you seek"_

" _Okay but daddy promise me you won't tell mummy I heard her"_

" _I promise my dear now promise me you will sleep" "_ _P_ _romise daddy"_

Well he was right the questions were still there when I woke up they plagued me all day keeping me distracted which proved to be a good thing.

I could block out the name calling which was worse now than ever. The only things that changed were I was quicker on my feet so I didn't get tripped as often I had started to learn to fight back now, Lexi was rubbing off on me she was teaching me to stand up for myself she was changing me because of her I was seeing I had worth I was special I wasn't the names they called me. It didn't stop them from hitting me shoving me against lockers Courtney took so much pleasure in shoving me down spitting on me, I was lucky when Gemma seemed to show up each time right before Courtney would kick me in my head. Helping me up she always dusted me off cleaned me up. " _Gemma you have done so much for me but I need something stronger these pills aren't working for me anymore"_ She sighed going into her purse handing me another baggie. I didn't ask what they were so long as they worked.

Commotion seemed to fill the halls as I went to my main locker kids were lining the halls chanting " _Die fag_ _g_ _ot die! Die homo die! Death to the homo's!"_ I shoved my way through the mess of kids swallowing against the fear as I saw why they were all chanting who they were chanting at Kit was standing at our locker his face beat read the door was ripped off the wall our books thrown on the floor ripped up pictures from our personal collections were thrown on the ground spray painted with bright pink color fagot, across the lockers in big white was the word Dyke, the word sent shivers through out my whole body I felt sick.

Bryan, his side kicks Ryon and Cian were shoving Kit around passing him like a used rag doll he fell to his knees tears welling up he was begging them to stop but they only laughed kicking him spitting on him. I wanted to help him but how? I was small I was … no I wasn't weak I wasn't the same girl that I was a few months ago I didn't waste time I didn't stop to think I just reacted I wasn't the only one Unity was by my side as we charged the boys who laughed at us but I didn't let their laughter get to me.

Instead I grabbed Bryan's shirt how I found the strength I didn't' even know I had. Throwing him against a locker shock filled his face but he charged throwing up my left arm I blocked his punch as I spun my left leg out tripping him than I spun and kicked him in his back. He flew across the hall. Unity pulled out her pepper spray and used it on Cian and Ryon who squealed in pain quickly she helped Kit up. I ran over but not in time before a few classmates tried to push Unity down calling her a fag lover grabbing at her she fought them but one of them ripped her skirt leaving us all gasping as the fabric came down.

Revealing Unity's silky black panties and their surprise unity was frozen in fear trying to cover her private parts but there was no covering it up. The bulge made it obvious she was really a he.

In seconds I was by her side wrapping my arms around her " _Tranny"_ Someone hissed _"Freak"_ Shoving my way through the crowd I hit a few with my elbow trying my best to cover her as Kit scurried up taking her other arm, a few students cleared the way helping to form a wall around us so we could get her to the school nurse. Collapsing on one of the benches I held her as she shock tears falling in rapid succession while I rubbed her back. Nurse O'Connor fixed Kit's cuts cleaned his blood off gave him some ice. A few minutes later Mrs. Sparks was by us taking Unity in her arms she couldn't stop crying running my fingers over Unity's face; I tried to make her feel better.

" _I don't love you any less Unity your still my best friend don't let these stupid ignorant kids get you down keep fighting keep being you"_

Her parents arrived twenty minutes later furious raising hell her mum was by her side hugging her thanking us for sticking by her, while her dad went charging into the head masters office.

The events from that day left me shaken my books were ruined spray painted with hateful remarks like Dyke, Homo lover, Slut, Bitch. The looks on my friends faces as they were humiliated hit spit at. I skipped Rep practice my head was pounding so hard I couldn't stop shaken. I was vomiting again it was hard to hold back the tears as I ran to my waiting car the paparazzi were horrible flashing their cameras at me as I tried to fight them off. Thankfully my parents were out because I was able to go straight to my room slamming my door as the tears fell. Why did these comments hurt worse than physical blows? I know the people making them are inconsiderate, arrogant, uneducated fools yet they cut me so deeply.

Dyke the word slammed into my skull painfully the punch was so deep it went to my stomach the nausea left me hunched over the toilet over and over.. it's not like that's the worst I had ever been called but the problem was most of those words were untrue. This one it wasn't a lie it was true I was one of them I was what they called me a Dyke. I've accepted it I was even somewhat proud of who I am not an easy thing given that I was raised in such a conservative family but they made it sound so dirty.

All weekend I lay in bed feeling sick my stomach cramping head pounding Damian was so sweet bringing me flowers he didn't try to kiss me he just laid next to me stroking my hair, of course mum and dad made me leave the door open. We talked for hours until he had to leave. Texting Kit and Unity I tried to see if they were okay but I fell asleep before I got any answers only to wake up in extreme pain. Food didn't set well with me pain relievers weren't helping. It was a restless night so I gave up and wrote in my journal.

 **Dear Envy**

 **Well once again another week of pure hell has passed. I've learned a few things though Secrets are their own prison, they seldom do any good. My friend Unity has been keeping a big one she was born with the assigned gender of a male but I guess she never truly felt at home as a boy so she made the transition to female. Except she never told any of us which is fine it's her life her choice but some aholes made it their business now she is humiliated. I'm worried I haven't heard from her in over a day. I hope she is okay. Kit was keeping his own secrets now their all over the school. He didn't want anyone to know not because he's ashamed but because he knows that kids are just too immature to handle how fabulous he is. I want so bad to help him to help her but how can I when I feel so lost so trapped myself? I really like Lexi she's kind pretty funny clever and she's a bad ass. Yet I know it's wrong I know lying to Damian is wrong, I feel so dirty there's no one I can talk to. No one except you I wish I could be a bad ass like Lexi or like Xena she's so tough she'd never let anyone see her cry even her bff Gabrielle. It's hard keeping a secret like this but I have to no one can ever know about me. Maybe people would be better off without me but than they'd win I won't give the bastards that satisfaction.**

Mum came in Saturday morning to take my temperature and try to talk to me but what could I say why would I? When I already knew she thought I was stupid if she knew I was gay to? Win win for her than. I didn't have a fever but these cramps wouldn't let up.

She convinced me to get up and go for a walk in the gardens with her. I won't admit it out loud but it was peaceful. We didn't say much we just enjoyed the beautiful flowers the Christmas decorations, I can't believe it's that close.

" _Sweetheart I know your troubled trying to get this project off the ground I can see your busting your butt to get this going but sometimes you need help"_

" _What kind of help mum?"_

" _May I remind you that you are thee princess Eleanor you have resources no one else has"_

" _Like?"_

" _Like friends in high places why don't you try reaching out to some of your industry friends see if any of them will be willing to spread the word"_

Why didn't I think of that? Pain over took me " _Aw mum I need to pee"_ She simply laughed rubbing my back hurrying me to the pool house which was closed for the season but still had a working bathroom. Relief flooded through me for a few seconds than I looked down and freaked out blood was pouring out I couldn't get it to stop whipping didn't help, panic made my heart race as I screamed seconds later mum was inside as I freaked out screaming I was dying I was going to bleed to death. She didn't freak though she just laughed took my hand and told me to calm down. I was breathing so hard I felt dizzy, but she was so calm helping me to clean up dress and wash myself up. It was the last thing I remembered before passing out.

When I woke up my head was pounding but I was in my own bed with a heating pad on my stomach a cool cloth on my forehead. Mum was by my side confusion left me drained as she squeezed my hand. " _What happened Mummy?" "Sweetheart you remember when you asked me when you would become a woman?" "Yea we were in Russia" "Well baby congrats your a woman now" "What do you mean? Because I passed out?" "No sweetie you got your period"_ I groaned falling back into my pillow she laughed harder helping me to sit up placing two pills on my tongue giving me some water. " _Sleep sweetie the pain should ease in a day or so" "A day or so I'll die before than!" "No you won't my love you think this is bad try giving birth" "NO way!" "Remember that next time you think I haven't done anything for you guess I have the last laugh now"_

Next time I woke Lexi was there laying next to me I noticed my door was closed her lips were pressed against my forehead. _"I brought you something to help you relax it'll help with the nausea as well"_ Helping me to sit up she handed me a joint " _It's medically proven to help with nausea"_ She showed me how to use it passing it back and forth in between stealing kisses. I fell asleep in her arms no mum you don't have the last laugh because if you only knew what I was doing in my bed and who I was doing it with you wouldn't be laughing. 


	38. Chapter 38

**Len**

Kit and Unity were both in school Monday we didn't discuss what happened but Kit was the first to volunteer to be my partner in pointe training. Which was a scary but exciting time the school took it very seriously you weren't even allowed to start training until you went to the doctors had xrays taken of your bones to make sure you were structurally ready. Mum however was pleased to know I had dropped ten labels since the summer. Dad not so much, yet all I cared about was that I was cleared to start.

Pointe training was tough everyday my feet bleed I was in so much pain but every night either Damian or Lexi were at my house making me soak my feet in warm soapy water massaging them. They were both at my performances, the balancing act was starting to wear on me. Thankfully there was so much going on at school I could easily be distracted. Mrs. Tanner announced we were doing Grease for the school musical and auditions were to be held Friday. I was flying high from the thought of auditions. Kit, Unity and I were all excitedly trying to pick songs out to sing for our auditions as we sat in one of the practice rooms Damian was in another one practicing his drums solo while he wasn't auditioning for a role he was auditioning for the orchestra and band which would be part of the musical.

" _I think I'll do a Cher song or a mix of Rupaul songs"_

" _You think that's a strong enough song Kit?"_

" _No you maybe right Unity but I don't know what to do what about you Len?"_

" _I don't know either"_ Unity spoke

" _I think I'll do you are not alone"_

The click of heals made us all stop and twist as we saw Courtney and her crew laughing as they came towards us. Groaning inside I braced myself " _I hope you ladies aren't thinking that one of you will be Sandy"_ She laughed rolling her eyes as I felt myself tense up. Before I could speak Unity squared her shoulders looked at her and spat back

" _What if we are there ain't a damn thing that you can do about it"_

" _Oh you think so freaks watch me I am the queen bitch in this school I have always gotten the lead roles and there is no way I am being upstaged by some spoiled rich kids and their no talented freaks so you better tighten up that leash dogs cause if you don't I will teach you a lesson you won't forget any time soon"_

" _Your all talk Courtney you know damn well if you do anything else you'll be suspended"_

" _Oh really Kit you think so"_

 _S_ he lunged at me grabbing my arms twisting them behind my back calling to her friends pain tore through me I couldn't move she was stronger than anyone thought her friends held me back as she suddenly pulled out scissors

" _Let her go!"_

" _Your crazy Courtney"_

Kit tried to pull her off but she stabbed at him with the scissors I saw Unity take off, I twisted kicking at her but her friends held me as I felt a rush of air as she clipped at my hair. Laughing she threw me to the ground as she held me down shoving the hair into my mouth gagging I swiped at her but she only hit me laughing. " _Get off of her!"_ Gemma's voice called as Courtney was suddenly ripped off of me I watched as Gemma grabbed her kicking her in her knees Courtney yelped. Shaking I let Unity who had come back with Gemma help me up " _How bad is it?"_ Kit grimaced as I felt my heart sink how was I going to explain this? 

I called Lexi that afternoon she sneaked into the tunnels

" _I really want Sandy"_

" _Why Sandy's such a good girl baby you were born to be Rizzo you need to embrace your inner bad ass it's so sexy on you"_

" _I don't know Riz is so tough"_

" _So are you who took on Bryan and his goons?"_

" _Yea and who couldn't stop Courtney and her pair of Scissors?"_

" _Baby she twisted her your arms your not a superhero I swear if I ever get a hold of her I will"_

" _Shh baby not tonight"_

I nuzzled her neck asshe giggled passing me a joint. " _You'll look so tight in black leather" "_ _Now what are we going to do with this hair?" "I have no clue I am just glad my parents are out of the country if Mum saw this she would flip"_ _"_ _Than it's a good thing I am a genius at hair so stop worrying baby let Lexi fix you up"_ She looked at me from all angles " _I have an idea can you trust me?"_ Why did I suddenly feel so nervous taking a deep breath I nodded anything had to be better than this cut Courtney had given me my hair was choppy uneven. 

I was shocked when she brought out the hair dye but I was down for whatever she thought would look good but not before I pushed her down crawled on top of her and kissed her, her arms wrapped around my waist as we wrestled both wanting dominance. Her lips were amazing soft sweet delicious.

Changing hair colors was terrifying mum was surely going to murder me but she knew how to calm me down pouring me some wine " _If the wine doesn't help you sweetheart Molly here will"_ She slipped it on my tongue as she handed me my filled glass than kissed my lips. We waited for about twenty minutes simply kissing and touching until I felt so relaxed I could just sleep forever. Than she started my god it felt amazing her hands on my head brushing my hair washing it. I laughed and laughed as we kissed, two hours later my hair was now dyed black cut a few inches shorter. I never felt so amazing. Climbing on top of her as we crawled by the fire we kissed laying half naked I laid in the warmth of her arm. " _Your so talented Len embrace it, don't be afraid to explore all of you not just the parts your parents want you to"_

People say that when you get settled into a relationship the kisses stop being shocking but I can honestly say three months into our relationship I am still blown away by her sweet lips, it's bliss warm mouth soft wet flesh, heavy breathing the smell of cranberries. I wanted to explore all of her but I was scared I didn't want her to think I was a slut or pushy she wasn't asking for more so maybe she didn't want it.

For now I was just happy my heart was skipping with joy than it would freeze probably just in shock that for once it was happy and there were no strings. " _Promise me you'll be there for me help me support me love me always?"_

" _Always Len just promise me you'll stay true to yourself?"_

" _I promise now shut up and kiss me cause_ _I got chills / They're multiplyin' / And I'm losing control / Cause the power you're supplying / It's electrifyin'"_

" _Oh my god I created a monster your so sappy"_

" _Well you better get use to it darlin' Cuz you're the only one, And my heart is set on you"_

She finally took the hint rolled me over and kissed me hard. Finally things weren't so cloudy.


	39. Chapter 39

**Len**

 **Dear Envy**

 **It's no wonder I am so messed up in the head growing up in a family like mine who wouldn't be? I swear my family is a leach filled zest filled pile of scum it sinks you in and sucks the life right out of you. Just when I start to feel normal the leaches come back out.**

 **Let me break it down for you this guilt was over whelming me the whole Damian thing so I went for a walk in the tunnels and ended up with advice from the last person I suspected; Uncle Cyrus.**

 **I honestly thought I could do this that I could keep playing my cards. I don't know why I did I should of known it would all come crashing down. It always dose.**

 **The day started out normal well as normal as any of my days ever do. Mum and dad were fighting when I woke up.** **I don't know what about as soon as Liam, Robert and I stepped into the room they shut up. Robert seemed to sense what was happening though. I know I am young but I am not dumb I know something is wrong. I can feel it but no one is talking. School was quite busy today we went further into the** **Stanislavski** **method of acting we learned that as a** **performer** **to** **discover what a character wants, what prevents the character from getting it, and what means the character will use to achieve this goal.** **We went further into it finding the** **"objective," "obstacle," and "method."** **We** **also determine** **d** **the circumstances of every scene, such as where the scene takes place, what is in the room, and what is going on in the outside world.** **Damian,** **Kit** **and I were paired up today** **.** **Looking over the script I took a deep breath.**

" **Different Love**

 **by**

 **Emily Tanner**

 **Pages: 2+**

 **Characters: 2 teen boys, 1 teen girl**

 **Kevin, 13**

 **Katie,14**

 **Jake, 15**

 **Synopsis: Kevin catches his girlfriend Katie cheating on him he is overcome with rage and lashes out on both of them.**

 **School Hall way by Jake's locker Katie enters sheepishly knowing Jake has just caught her and Kevin kissing.**

 **Jake; "** _I can't believe you would do this to me Katie after everything I have done to keep us together after all the bullying I endured, everyone told me I wasn't good enough that I could never measure up to the great Katie Nigel the daughter of the town mayor teen model, yet you told me I was, you promised me we would be together forever"_

 **Katie: "** _I'm so sorry Jake I know what I did was wrong but it meant nothing"_

 **Jake: { Laughs sarcastically} "** _Oh it meant nothing huh! So you always go around kissing random guys! So your a slut just like everyone always warned me the ones who weren't saying I wasn't good enough anyway"_

 **Katie: "** _They were lying you are more than good enough I am the one who isn't good enough. I am sorry Jake I didn't I wasn't thinking I was upset I just found out I didn't book the commercial shoot I was auditioned for it would of banked a lot of money. I needed that job mum lost her job last week and dad well [_ Katie looks down at her feet which are restless kicking at the tiled floor letting out a sigh she nervously looks back up] _Dad left I haven't heard from him since I was counting on this job t_ _o_ _help ease some of the financial burden off mum's shoulders,_ _I just I was so upset and Kevin tried to comfort me I don't know why I kissed him I just I needed to feel something besides pain"_

Kevin enters the room looking smug grinning at Jake, Mrs. Tanner stopped us.

" _Young actors now I want you to ask yourselves these questions"_

 _"What if what happens in the scene was really happening to me?"_

" _Where do I come from?"_

 _"What do I want?"_

 _"Where am I going?"_

 _"What will I do when I get there?"_

" _Kit ask yourself why is Kevin being so smug?"_

" _Was he trying to steal Katie?_ _"_

" _Damian ask yourself where is Jake coming from when he attacks Katie?_ _"_

" _What is he feeling?"_

" _Leni ask yourself What does Katie want?"_

" _Does she want to be forgiven?"_

" _Is she trying to break up with him and didn't have the words to do it?"_

" _Stanislavsky encouraged his students to concentrate on actions rather than emotions. In every scene, the actor has an objective (a goal of what he wants to accomplish) and faces a series of obstacles. To reach his goal, the actor breaks the scene down into beats, with each beat being an active verb, something the character does to try to reach his objective."_

" _Here are a few examples of active verbs that can be actions in scenes: t_ _o help,_ _t_ _o hurt,_ _t_ _o praise,_ _t_ _o demean,_ _t_ _o leave,_ _t_ _o keep_ _t_ _o convinc_ _e."_

" _Damian break Jake's emotions into beats how does he feel when he walks in and sees Katie kissing Kevin?"_

" _Well_ _if_ _I walked in and saw Leni kissing another guy. I would be hurt really hurt I mean I would feel like my heart was being broken._

 _W_ _hich would be to be in pain than_ _I imagine I would want to accomplish causing Leni to feel the same pain I was_ _in_ _which would be to demean. Excellent break down Damian now Leni can you do the same?_

 **Envy I have to tell you** __ **I already was in my mind my objective was I wanted to have both my worlds. I wanted Damian so it would appear as if I was a normal fourteen year old girl yet inside I wanted nothing more than to be with Lexi.** **My active verb was to keep convincing myself it would all be okay when it wasn't I didn't say this out loud instead I made up a quick breakdown for Katie which seemed to please Mrs. Tanner but all I could think about after was how Damian's eyes looked right into mine as he broke down his character and spoke about his feelings for me. He was so sincere. After school we went to the park even though it was cold and snowy Damian really wanted to get some football practice in let me tell you it was a challenge playing in thirty degrees bundled up in winter jackets with fresh snow on the ground, yet it brought him happiness. He kicked my butt of course but it was still fun we ended up slipping like crazy.** **A** **t one point I fell right on him we both laughed like crazy than he wrapped his arms around me pulled me close and kissed me long. Frozen we went to grab some hot chocolate as we tried to warm up.** **Holding hands with him we just talked.**

" _Mum is insane she is furious that we are together I don't know why she so against you"_

" _People fear what they don't know babe there are a lot of misconception about my family_ _maybe something happened to her years ago it is not up to us to figure out our parents all we need to do is find our own happiness Damian"_

" _I love how you think Leni that's why I will do whatever I have to just to be with you" "Mum has me on punishment forever because of the party and that fight every night I have to work at the restaurant as soon as I get home until closing at eleven._ _T_ _han I have homework till all hours in_ _t_ _he night she is watching every step I take I'm lucky I have time to piss she has me on lock down right now she thinks I'm at school._ _S_ _o I better get going it was great spending time with you Leni I can't wait for Christmas break"_

" _Me either were having a holiday party at the palace would you like to come Damian?" "Yes I'd love to but I have to see if I can sneak away I'll let you know"_

 **Envy it killed me knowing he was doing so much to be with me I was so confused I thought going for a walk in the tunnel as I smoked a little would help me.**

 **It didn't it just left me so confused as I sat by the fireplace I recalled all the nights I lay with Lexi in this room watching Xena cuddled as we giggled** **talking about the episode and their underlining relationship.**

 **Lexi's arms had been wrapped around me as I lay in them half naked with only my undergarments on we hadn't really ever done anything** **Envy just kiss and sometimes touch but damn did I want to do more. I was laughing as she kissed outside my ear as we watched Xena bathe Gabrielle**

" _Think about the fun they had together; the baths they shared Leni"_

 _"If you're talking about their 'special relationship Lexi "I'm into that! I think it could be fun to bathe together"_

" _Well my dear maybe we should explore that option"_

" _Do you really think they were lovers Lexi?"_

" _Yes I do I mean look at the way Xena gazes at Gabrielle I mean she's a cold hearted warrior who killed people for pleasure fun but when she looks at Gabrielle she sees the good in the world she's reminded there are somethings some people worth dying for worth changing for she'll risk anything for her"_

 **Envy Lexi looked deep into my eyes and I swear I felt my spirit** **literary** **fly no one has ever made me feel that way before** **the way she kissed me it left me speechless. "** _Do you really believe that kind of love exists_ _Lexi?"_ _"It's what we all dream about, isn't it_ _Leni_ _?" "Someone looks so deeply into our soul that they find something worth dying for."_ **We** **spen** **t** **a** **few heart** **beat** **s** **looking into each other's eyes.** **Envy it was the greatest feeling ever.**

" _Well well what do we have here?"_

" _Uncle Cyrus?"_

" _The one the only the fabulous my my do I see Alcohol here and fags?"_

" _Aren't we a little young my dear niece?"_

" _It's legal in private residents dear uncle"_

" _I know it is but it doesn't mean it's good for you"_

" _Lots of things are bad for you uncle but it doesn't mean I can't indulge in them"_

" _Is something troubling you Eleanor?"_

Do I trust him? He has never liked me or Liam why was he sitting so close to me now? " _It's crazy isn't it?" "What?"_ He threw down a tabloid on my lap which showed me and Damian on the cover in the park me laying on top of him as we kissed, I groaned at the headline "Princess romp in the park" another groan escaped me as I threw the paper down.

" _I'm fourteen can't they get an effing life and stop stalking me you know for any other fourteen year old this would be illegal taking pictures of a child"_

" _Yes dear but were not normal people were royalty so the rules are blurred_ _where was your security detail Eleanor?"_

" _I sent Jack away so we could have some privacy"_

" _Why did he listen your a minor he doesn't take orders from you Leni he takes orders from his boss the king and the queen"_

" _Oh dear god Uncle your not really going there with me are you please we all know you use to ditch your security detail as a kid"_

" _Yes I did and I know the trouble I use to get into Eleanor which is why I don't want to see you get into the same situations I use to times are a lot different now the threats are greater"_

" _Uncle what is all this talk about threats, dangers Mum and dad were fighting earlier but they won't tell me why"_

" _It is not for young ears to know but if it is what you wish I will tell you"_

" _I assume there's a price uncle we both know you are not one to share because you care"_ **Uncle Cyrus placed his arm around my shoulders as he moved closer passing me a joint which was stronger than any I have ever tried. Yet it calmed me.**

" _What is this uncle?"_

" _It's called ice darling niece it's expensive and there's been a crack down on sells lately but somehow there's a teen by the name of Bryan who goes to your school he has been selling it for a number of weeks"_

" _Uncle your one of the richest men in the world you can't simply send a man down to grab it?"_

" _Not right now were under watch"_

" _What do you mean?"_

" _I will trade you information dear niece if you get me what I crave"_

" _It's illegal if I get caught" "_

 _D_ _on't get caught Leni"_

" _You want to know why Simon and Helena are fighting?"_

" _Yes I do"_

" _Be-careful what you wish for Leni have you noticed there has been extra security here lately?"_

" _Yes"_

" _Do you ever wonder why?"_

" _Yes but no one will tell me they say I am too young" "_

 _Youth is just an excuse the simple minded use to escape dealing with talking to someone who they fear will understand too much._

 _I don't think your dumb Leni on the contrary I think your smarter than most adults I know that's why I know you can understand what I am going to tell you do you remember a few months ago at dinner when Robert was talking about death"_

" _Yea he creped me out"_

" _He was freaked out Eleanor"_

" _Why?"_

" _There was a threat against his school his very life Islamic terrorists tried to kidnap him" The threat has become even realer now two days ago there was a present sent here to the palace when Ted and his men opened it a bomb went off"_

" _Are they okay?"_

" _Yes the_ _ir_ _fine they have ways to open these things without anyone getting hurt but it sent a message to us we are always in danger our blood is_ _always rip for someone to spill"_

" _Robert will be okay right?"_

" _We have precautions in place he knows he is to always obey his security detail yes I believe he shall be fine"_

" _You my dear have a bigger threat"_

" _What's that?"_ **I should have been feeling scared I know right he just told me someone had tried to kill my brother yet I didn't feel scared I was calm relaxed. I kind of felt like I was floating on clouds, I felt Cyrus's hands massaging my shoulders.**

" _I saw you on the security camera sneaking in that hussy well done you she's a beauty but if I saw you than it's only a matter of time before the queen sees you as well or your dad you know how they feel about gay people"_

" _I know how my mum feels but my dad's never talked to me about it"_

" _He hates them Eleanor why do you think I hide who I am"_

" _Wait your?"_

" _I'm bisexual Leni I knew since I was around your age my father practically disowned me told me. I was a sin a disgrace to the throne he wanted to throw me out but your father my dear brother stopped him convinced him that I couldn't be thrown out._ _A_ _fter all if something happened to him who would take over the throne but he told me I should hide who I am that our father was right I was a disgrace_ _but he would over look me being a little funny_ _he promised he would keep me in a life of luxury so long as I never uttered a word about who I was"_

" _Why would you?"_

" _Simple we all have secrets we all have desires but it's not for the world to know them I want nothing more than to be king to do that I have to play by the rules for now" "_ _I'll keep yours Eleanor if you do what I ask"_

" _Fine Uncle"_

" _Eleanor a bit of advice"_

" _What is it Uncle?"_

" _This Damian boy he's nice and all but I don't see a fire in your eyes when your with_ _him but_ _that little hussy"_

" _Her name is Lexi and she's not a hussy"_

" _Sure she isn't but whatever her name is there's a spark there in your eyes go with who your heart tells you to"_

" _What if my heart is telling me to do what everyone says is wrong?"_

" _Than screw everyone else just be smart about it"_

" _I'm so confused first your tell me to hide who I am than your telling me to break up with Damian which is it Uncle?"_

" _Life is often cloudy Grey and confusion Eleanor that's why we have these amazing escapes"_ **He handed me a** **glass tube** " _This_ _is_ _called a bong my dear niece"_ **He poured wine into it** _Now breathe it in hold it exhale lay your head back feel it working babe?"_ **I laid my head back like he said envy damn did I ever feel it working.** **I felt myself drifting off into another world as he poured more into it. "** _Who is this Bryan that I am suppose to see?" "I believe you know him Leni his name is Bryan Matthews"_ **Chocking I shot up staring at him he grinned leaning back. Did he know? He couldn't could he?**

 **My uncle wouldn't be that sick could he? He wouldn't make me buy drugs from the very person who wanted me dead. I didn't think anyone could be that twisted, than two days later I watched while he attacked my father his own brother with a sword he almost cut his head off. "** _It's too bad they outlawed beheading"_ **I screamed but Mum sat there calm as a cucumber eating her salad. "** _Cyrus stop with your little tamper tantrum your scaring my daughter" "Just because Simon doesn't give into your every whim doesn't mean you can chop his head off"_

" _This isn't a little temper tantrum I am one breath away from the greatest throne on earth I should be the king not you!"_ **He slammed his hand down on the table as mum motioned for the guards to take him. Which he fought like crazy but the guards were more powerful slamming him to the ground throwing him over their shoulders. "** _What the heck was that about Mum?" "Sweetie your getting older now you should know the truth your uncle is a drug addict sometimes he goes on these bad trips where he thinks vengeance is his ultimate goal he envies your father and wants the throne"_

" _Why do you keep him around daddy?"_

 **I was shaking badly mum just rolled her eyes as Robert came over and hugged me. "** _He's family Leni family doesn't turn their back on family no matter what they become_ _besides he is next in line for the throne the monarchy must always be preserved_ _" "Cyrus has always been a little funny even as a kid but he's my little brother so I will always protect him sometimes the lust for power temptations over takes us, we must fight against those sins"_ **To him My uncle being gay was something he was ashamed of he said funny but I knew he meant gay so if he feels this way about his own brother how would he feel about me?** **I couldn't stop shaking I felt sick again. If it ever came out I would be a disgrace to him to.**

 **So you see dear envy I can never be me I can never come out death would be a more suitable answer.** **It may not be so far off the mark either if I have to deal with Bryan. I hate him so much but If I don't do what Cyrus wants he'll tell I know he will I could see it in the way he looked at me. What is wrong with this family? Mum just sat there while dad was almost killed and dad barely even batted an eye, but Liam, Robert and I were all shaken. It's now wonder Liam and I refused to sleep in our own rooms that night.**

 **Why is it that, as a culture, we are more comfortable seeing two men holding guns than holding hands?** **I wish I knew that answer. All I know is I am tired of being me I wish I had someone else life.** **It doesn't matter that** **I** **work so hard** **I** **fall asleep at** **my** **desk, it's still never enough!** **I** **get timid and jumpy and make wrong decisions, and that means more bullying because, you see, the bully is never going to stop, whatever they do.** **I** **will do anything to make it stop** **but it won't it never will. I thought I had it under control I am getting stronger but it doesn't matter because there will always be someone trying to take me down for just being me. Sometimes it's my own screwed up family. Happy Birthday to me! Not.**


	40. Chapter 40

**Eleanor**

Friday I was so nervous I couldn't eat or drink any attempt left me gagging chocking even though Liam, Gemma, Kit, Unity and I stayed up late every night rehearsing lines and our songs. I was still not confident. Sitting in the auditorium I felt shaky as I watched students going up singing their hearts out some were stopped after a few bars, while others got to go on there were so many talented students, a few who weren't that good but still they had courage to try even when rejected.

Please don't let me get rejected. Someone touched my hand as I opened my eyes I saw Liam was next to me holding my hand.

" _Your going to be amazing Len no worries"_

" _Thanks Liam so what song are you doing?"_

" _It'll be a surprise what about you?"_

" _Same if I don't chicken out"_

" _You won't babe I won't let you remember were in this together"_

He nodded to me as Gemma stepped on stage. I wondered what role she was after. As soon as she opened her mouth I knew my heart sank as she started moving across stage her moves were spot on her mouth sassy her face seductive her eyes connected with the judges including Mrs. Tanner, Mrs. Ruska and Mr. Lane. " _She is amazing Len for all her flaws she knows how to work a stage" "Yeah I know I wish I could move like that" "_ _Len your more talented than you know close your eyes stop letting the nerves take over you and remember what we use to say as kids_ _p_ _ut your arms around yourself look to the sun and remember someone will always be here to remind you of all that you can be and that someone is me"_ I smiled as I laid my head on his shoulder Lexi's voice rung in my ears " _Your so talented Len embrace it, don't be afraid to explore all of you not just the parts your parents want you to" "_ _Thanks Liam" "Welcome Sis oh I'm up" "Break a leg" "If I do I know you'll have two ready for me to lean on" "Always"_

I watched as Liam strolled up to the stage full of confidence Gemma winked at him as she stepped down smiling confidently taking a deep breath he stepped up " _Good afternoon I am Liam Henstridge and I am auditioning for the role of Danny I will be singing thnxs 4 the mmrs by fall out boy"_

Liam's voice was smooth and rich as he started singing snapping his fingers tapping his foot clapping his hands than he moved effortlessly as he started dancing, they didn't stop him. A few more kids went we sat in silence watching, Unity slipped in mid auditions along with Kit and Damian. Leaning into kiss me he whispered " _Good luck but I know you'll blow them away"_ Courtney was right before me while her voice was powerful. I noticed she was off key and spent more time trying to catch the judges eyes by swaying her hips.

I can do better I knew I can. Standing up I waited till she was done blowing kisses to the judges please how fake can you get? I kept repeating Lexi's voice in my head as I took each step. " _Your so talented Len embrace it, don't be afraid to explore all of you not just the parts your parents want you to"_ standing in front of the judges I took a deep breath they looked so serious taking notes barely looking up make it count Len. " _Good afternoon I am Eleanor Len Henstridge I am auditioning for the role of Rizzo I will be singing Defying Gravity"_

With each note each lyric my voice grew as did my confidence I didn't spend every second looking at the judges but I did glance at them every so often smile as I moved across the stage. When it was over I thanked them for their time bowed and went off. Liam embraced me into a huge hug as soon as I came off stage my cheering section was in full force. Smiling I felt myself blush but I couldn't help but wish Lexi was here. Even as Damian kissed me hugging me telling me how beautiful I was how proud he was, my heart was longing for Lexi. It was her touch I craved her adorable voice I longed to hear. Even Gemma told me how amazing I did. " _A new hairdo a new confidence a new Len well done you I love the color on you" "Thanks it was covered up pretty well huh?" "Yea you would never know it was a mess less than twenty four hours ago whoever did it did a great job" "You like Liam?" "Sure Gemma but mum will flip"_

Flip was an understatement I thought England would declare war when I walked into her office timidly she looked up from her papers which she was signing as she talked on her cell phone, I saw her eyes change instantly her jaw tightened as she barked into the phone. " _I don't give a bloody pig's foot how you get it done just get it done and get it done now! I have to go!"_ She slammed the glass down throwing the chair back as Rachel jumped barely catching mum's phone which she threw at her.

" _Good God_ _Eleanor what the hell were you thinking!" "You look beastly have you gone mad child?"_

" _I'm not a child mum your the one who keeps telling me I am growing up well part of growing up is making my own choices doing things that are good for me"_

" _How is chopping off your hair and dying it the color of death good for you?"_

" _Did that dye slip into your brain and cut off oxygen?"_ Her words cut through me did she really think I looked beastly? Was I really that ugly? Why would a hair cut and dye make that much of a difference? It couldn't it had to just be me she must really hate me, but why what did I do?

" _You know damn well that I have spent years creating your image there is a reason as to why I pick out your outfits why I script you three why I only make sure you only see the best hairstylist, doctors, dentists, teachers, designers, you are thee princess of england nothing but the best will do the people except us to live up to a certain decor of excellence"_

" _Nothing will change that mum I'm still me I know what my duties are I honor them"_

" _Bullocks Eleanor if you respected this family you wouldn't act like such a child you know damn well I would never approve of this any haircut any style change must be pre-approved" "Look at me Eleanor tell me the real reason as to why you did this?" "Did someone say something to you do something to you?"_

" _NO!" Why would you even think that?"_

" _Because my daughter thee princess has never defied me before she knows who she is she is proud to present for her great country she has always followed the rules she has never disobeyed me talked back to me did foolish things this girl here she is not my daughter"_

" _I am your daughter mum I'm just growing up I have my own style my own likes, I was sick of my hair it wasn't exciting this color gives me life I feel bolder I feel braver I like feeling tough"_

" _Codswallop Eleanor I know your just blowing out your arse now so either man up and tell me what's really happening or face the consequences"_

" _Mum why are you being so blinkered you won't even listen to one thing I have to say?"_

" _I already stated my case Eleanor you have three seconds_ _one…_

My heart was racing I couldn't tell her I just couldn't! I wanted to so damn bad I wanted her to hold me to tell me she would fix it all but I wasn't a kid any more. I had to handle my own problems she yanked my chin up looking straight to my eyes.

" _Are you lean?"_

I swallowed trying not to shake did she see it in my eyes? Could she tell that I had taken two of Gemma's pills? Stay focused stay calm Len you can do this she hasn't noticed for months so just keep it together.

" _Nah Mum why would you think that? I don't use drugs you know that and I haven't had a drink in donkey years"_ She carefully looked me over I was so nervous I was almost pissing myself what would she do if she found out I was using?

" _So your sticking with that story growing up needing a change?"_

" _Yes Mum I am cause it's the truth"_

" _Fine I know your lying so you want to play it that way with no regards to this family's image all the work I have done over the years to make sure you are seen in the right lights than you can acce_ _p_ _t the_ _outcome_ _like a grownup_ _your grounded for fortnights no TV, No phones, No laptop, no friends no going out you will come straight home after school, do your homework accompany me to my meetings than eat dinner and go to bed"_

There was no point in even arguing " _Give me your mobile Eleanor"_ Reluctantly I sighed giving it to her instantly she turned it on " _Pass-code Eleanor" "What no way Mum that's private!" "When will you learn Eleanor nothing is private in this house I am the queen of this palace and I will find out so either give it to me willingly or add to your punishment"_

" _This isn't fair mum!"_

" _Life's not fair Eleanor now pas_ _s_ _-code"_

I screamed as Rachel stood a safe distance away grinning. " _Stop with the damn dramatization my little actress save It for the stage now what is the code?"_

" _AC511"_

" _Strange code what does it stand for?"_

" _It's private mum you don't need to know that just be happy you got it may I go now?"_

" _Cut the sass Eleanor and yes you may go but rest assure I will find out what it means and yes it is my business as long as you are my daughter it will always be my business"_ Dear god I hope I deleted all my text messages from Lexi.

I felt myself start to sweat as I went out Rachel's eyes followed me once I was out of sight I changed directions going to the tunnel to my secret room. Carefully keeping my eyes alert I slipped inside going to where I keep a spare pre paid mobile device shooting Lexi and Damian two separate text messages.

 **Lexi**

 **6:30 pm**

 **Len: What a load of cack I am so cheesed off Mum grounded me for forthnights all because she hates my hair won't be able to contact you. Lexi unless I can sneak off this is so bloody unfair I can't go two weeks without seeing your sweet face receiving your sweet kisses we must find a way around this she's such a cow for doing this!**

I pressed send quickly than texted Damian.

 **Damian**

 **6:31**

 **Len: Mum lost her bloody mind and grounded me for two weeks I'll talk to you tomorrow so cheesed off uh!**

Once it was sent I shut it down and shoved it back into the box which I slipped in between the floor boards put the boards back and moved the couch over it. Than hurried back to my room she wouldn't get away with this. " _There you are the queen knew you were up to something so where were you Princess?"_ I jumped as Rachel startled me coming up behind me as I turned around swallowing I felt my anger rose who was she to butt in? " _Visiting Liam I assume I am allowed to see my own brother" "Well she didn't say no but I will be visiting Liam to make sure your story checks out of course I will also run this by the queen if Liam says you weren't there you can except this punishment to be extended goodnight Princess" "I'm sure you would just love to see that happen Rachel but Liam will back me now get out of my room"_ I slammed the door feeling more angry and violated god did I erase those text messages? Please don't let Lexi text me anymore. I shuttered remembering the text from this morning 

**Lexi: Len _Damn I can't stop feeling how wet you feel when I am holding you naked while we lay by the fireplace Len my body is craving Sunday when we can together again but I'm on a diet so can I just skip the ice cream and pour chocolate syrup over your luscious body and suck your scrumptious cherries?"_**

God please I hope I got rid of them if Mum saw them I would be mortified and so busted. Collapsing on my bed I willed myself not to cry getting on my knees I sent a prayer up.

" _God grant me the serenity  
to accept the things I cannot change;  
courage to change the things I can;  
and wisdom to know the difference."_


	41. Chapter 41

**Lexi**

I was shaking so hard when I read her text message how could her mum be so draft? I mean she's the queen of England for Christ sakes. All day Saturday I was slamming around the restaurant it got so bad mum finally yelled at me to piss off. Throwing my apron down I grabbed my car keys and drove as close to the palace grounds as I dared. Thankfully I have a mate Jenny who lives two blocks from where the estate was. I kept my car there as I pondered how I was to get inside without being seen. I knew her mum would be watching I didn't know if she knew about us but I didn't want to risk Len being punished anymore. " _Impressive isn't it?"_ I looked to my right to see one of those bloody paps lurking around in fact he looked annoyingly familiar. " _You want in?"_ He was speaking again wait he was speaking to me? What could this dude want? " _Maybe what's it to you?" "I can get in" "Oh yeah that right mate? Than why are you here?" "Because I can get in but I can't get close enough to the family to get a report" "You know princess Eleanor I know I have seen you sneaking around with her"_

Feck how did he know? " _Name is D-Throned what do you say I get you in you get me a story"_ What could it hurt? Hell I'm sure I could make one up. Would Len be mad though? I know she hates this dude the whole family seems to can't blame them he never leaves them alone he's always on their trail snapping photo's of them, harassing them. If I didn't take his deal though it could be weeks before I saw my beautiful princess. I couldn't wait that long I needed to see her beautiful green eyes feel her soft sensual skin against my finger tips. " _Okay fine I hope I don't regret this"_ " _You won't darling neither will I"_ He motioned to the far end of the right side. People were lined up at the gates for the start of the tour the royal guards paced up and down quickly we ran past the crowd away from the front. The high preeminent walls scared me but he silenced me taking my hand we crouched down waiting to the security cameras to pass. Than we ran he knew a spot inside the right hand corner pulling back some bushes wiggling one of the wires from the fence which jilted open slipping inside we watched for the camera's and the guards as soon as we got a clear path we took off. Hiding inside bushes behind tress, I was breathing hard already the palace was almost a mile or two away yet. On our knees we waited we watched each time the guards turned we moved up another tree. Soon there were no tress no place to cover so we just winged it. Halfway there we paused laying low in the ground he texted someone within minutes heart stopping minutes mind you someone pulled up in a golf cart he grabbed my hand we got in ducking low the person who I could tell worked for the palace covered us with a white tarp.

The ride was bumpy but I would go through anything to see Princess Eleanor. Once we got to the palace we waited for clearance than sneaked inside through the severance entrance. Swallowing I looked around I have never truly made it into the main part of the palace just the tunnels and an occasional visit to her room. " _Miss Cunningham?"_ I spun hearing my name seeing a young maid who couldn't be more than 17 stand before me looking nervous. " _Yes how do you know me?" "Lexi we go to school together"_ She was whispering looking around scared now it hit me " _Kimberly?" "Yes are you here to see Prince Liam?" "Yes"_ A lie but it couldn't hurt " _Follow me I'll help you he asked me to watch out for his company"_

I have no clue where the dude went but who cares. I was this close to seeing Len I wouldn't be stopped now. Kim moved swiftly the palace seemed very busy today. " _We must move quick here"_ She handed me a pile of linens shoving me into a closet " _Change into this quick no one will notice"_ She gave me a maid's outfit. I hated these things they were so demeaning to woman but whatever I have to do to see her. Once I had that on we could move more freely " _How long have you been working here?" "Two years my mum is a maid here so is my older sister we must be careful the queen is on a war path today"_ I swallowed as we climbed the grand staircase which was loaded with people moving around busily talking on mobiles shouting to one another. I took it all in this world was crazy.

Getting up the steps it was a bit quieter but not by much. " _These are the family's private quarters so we must be careful only a few selected staff are allowed up here if you are caught you will be fired and arrested they know who has access who doesn't"_

She suddenly stopped pushed me back behind a door as we heard a woman yelling " _Are you kidding me Eleanor these grades are hideous!_ _You assured me that you could handle being in this school plus having a boyfriend!"_

" _I can mum I am it's just one lousy 69 and it's in maths of all subjects you know I have always been rubbish in maths their giving me tutoring mum I have a test I can make up I promise I'll get it up!"_

" _You don't have a bloody choice Eleanor if you don't get it up you'll be kicked out oh and your grounded till further notice"_

" _What Mum that isn't fair! I'm already grounded! Well your punishment just got extended now get out of my face your a disgrace you little brat"_

My heart broke hearing her mum scold her like a little child. Kimberly held me back while Len came storming out I saw tears welling up in her eyes. Through a little crack in the doors to the parlor I could see the shadow of a tall thin elegant woman who I imagined must be her mum pacing. Swallowing I saw how scared Kimberly was of getting caught with me. While I knew I should be respectful of her all I saw was Eleanor's crumbling face her hunched over shoulders. I didn't stop to think I just raced out coming from behind her grabbing her shoulder her scream echoed but before she could even turn around. I was attacked by two grown men dressed in black yelling at me to get my hands off the princess. She spun around as another man dressed in a grey suit came running up behind her

" _Princess Eleanor are you alright?"_

" _Yes Ted I just got scared"_

" _Lexi?"_

Len whispered pulling me aside I nodded frozen in fear as the parlor door's flew open " _What is going on here?" "Eleanor are you alright?" "_ _Uh yes Mum it was a mistake this servant her_ _e_ _stepped out of line"_ Len's voice deepened as she stepped by the older man as her mum came closer I've only ever seen the queen on TV she's always been beautiful larger than life someone to admire. Now however she looked scary her eyes were two icy orbs tearing right through me her words were cold harsh daggers that tore at my self confidence.

" _Servants are to follow a code of conduct what is your name little girl?" "Who trained you?"_ I could barely speak I was shaking " _Don't you know to bow to your queen?"_ Oh my god how could I forget? My heart started to race

" _Ted take Eleanor to her room now she's on punishment to further notice she is not to leave without me or her father or Robert no one other than family is allowed in"_

" _As you wish your Majesty" "Princess let's go"_

Eleanor groaned as the man named Ted took her arm leading her away I watched her eyes go from her mum to him to me there was a longing in her sad eyes.

" _Are you deaf little girl?" "Who told you that you were allowed to come to these quarters?" "These are restricted for family and assigned staff members"_ I couldn't help but stare at her she was so beautiful

" _Didn't your mother ever teach that you are_ _not to look at the Queen or any of the royals" "You are unworthy to be at the same eye level show some respect keep your head down and be as discreet as possible."_

" _You speak when spoken to and only when I command you" "You greet me as your_ ** _majesty_** ** _first_** ** _," then as "ma'am."_**

" _My children are Your Royal Highness you never touch a member of the royal family. You should always wait for_ _us_ _to extend_ _our_ _hand to you and with that handshake, just be nice and gentle," "Do anything_ _you_ _are asked to do without question._

 _Report any other staff who say disparaging things about_ _us_ _. Never whistle or sing whilst working." "_ _Do you know what happens to those ingrates who break these rules?"_ I couldn't speak I was shaking badly " _Helena I think you have scared the_ _bejesus_ _out of the poor girl for_ _Christ_ _sake's Helena she's a child she was probably dragged into this_ _by her overworked mum because she spent to much at the shops"_

PrinceCyrus came up I stiffened when he threw his arm around my shoulders as Queen Helena huffed " _Fine do what you like with her Cyrus but if you know what's good for you little girl you will learn quickly what is excepted of you and what happens if one does not properly execute her duties"_ She turned her hair flying behind her as she snapped her fingers and some lady hurried after her the man turned to me leaned in whispering. " _Now little girl hurry on I am sure the princess is waiting for you but please remind her that she owes me and I intend to collect on that"_

He walked me to her room the minute I entered I saw her turn gasping in shock/ surprise " _Lexi!"_ Throwing her arms around me as I raced to her grabbing her" _"_ _I was so worried about you when I read your text I knew I couldn't go two weeks without seeing you"_

" _Thank god Lexi how did you get in here though? Security is so tight here"_

" _We all have our secrets babe" "Enough about me Len how are you? I heard the way your mum was screaming at you she was_ _so cold"_ The way she shrugged looking down as she lit up a joint worried me

" _No wore than normal"_ No one should ever see that kind of abuse shaming as normal. I watched as she inhaled than exhaled the smoke filling the room as it passed from her nose and luscious lipshanding me the joint I took a hit

" _Your starting to become a natural not bad for someone who had never smoked before she met me." "What can I say I had an amazing sexy patient teacher"_ Her smile was so seductive it melted me taking her hand I let her lead me to her bed as I wrapped my arms around her sitting on her bed we shared the rest of the joint

" _You look really sexy in this little maid outfit I may have to put you to work"_ Squeezing my bum she grinned  & opened a wine cooler. " _Remember the first time I had one of these?"_ " _Yea"_ We started laughing like crazy as we lay on her bed arms entwined " _That party in the warehouse that your friend threw where that awesome band played we were the youngest ones there and we were both scared so you took my hand and made me dance even though I was ready to piss myself in fear" "_ _I'll always remember that night in more ways than one"_ Her smile intrigued me what did she mean? Teasing her I poked her in the ribs " _Aw does that mean my little secret_ _has another secret?" "I might"_ I started to tickle her as she giggled why did she look so nervous? " _Len you know you can tell me anything right?"_ She nodded as she sipped the down home punch by Jack Daniels the sweet yet sour liquid left a million different tastes in my mouth " _I love the peach and cheery flavors you wouldn't think they would mix" "Yum peach I want to taste all I taste is orange" "So come on over and taste it baby"_ She did smiling as I took her in my arms, I felt her poke me it took everything in me not to smile if I cracked open my mouth she would have access but that wouldn't be as fun.

She squealed as she kissed my lips but I still wouldn't budge or open my mouth for her to have access so she took it upon herself to find a way. I loved the way her tongue licked my lips her lips kissed my check bones descending against my jawline sending little tremors raging through my body. Crawling on top of me she pushed me back against her bed her hands working their way up my stomach than my back. I could feel my whole body gasp in response I grabbed her shirt watching her as she smiled eying my hand on her chest. " _You find something you like baby?" "I did I could hold on to this forever" "Not much to hold onto" "Stop that baby I love what you have it's perfect your still growing babe don't put yourself down"_ Slowly I lifted her shirt off god she had an amazing body perfect as far as I was concerned. God this view was amazing laying her back I trailed kisses up her stomach hearing her gasp gave me energy " _Lexi oh...Yes…_ She hung her head back allowing me access to her sweet neck which I sucked till she moaned so loudly we both gasped fearing someone would hear us. Giggling we fell on her bed arms wrapped around each other. Laying my head on her shoulder we froze hearing another voice call out " _Len are you alright?"_ The voice belongs to a male but I don't know who. She's breathless as she tries to answer, " _I'm fi-ne" "No your not"_ I whisper as she swats at me but I only giggle softly running my fingers over her bare stomach her gasps as she tried to maintain her composer only made me laugh that much harder. " _Robbie I'm good I'm just reading a book and there's some funny par…_

My mouth has now found her soft but juicy flesh along her breast bone, she can hardly breathe let alone talk. There was a god like power which was almost scary to me knowing I had that power to make her forget how to do such simple things like talking, breathing, thinking. " _Are you sure sis?" "Yes!"_ She said it with to much conviction I started to worry a little would he come in and catch us? I stopped touching her so she could compose herself throwing her one of her shirts that was laying on her bed. The powerful Ambrosia like feeling lifted as reality set back in as I prepared to jump under the bed if I had to.

I stared up into her beautiful face which went from being relaxed carefree to instantly becoming tense when she heard his voice. " _What book are you reading sis?"_ I saw her face tense as she tried to think of an answer " ** _ _Mates, Dates and Inflatable Bras"__**

 ** _Good choice I read that one last year it had me in shits and giggles for days. "_** ** _ _Who wrote it?"__** ** _She panicked looking at me_** ** _I whispered_** _Cathy Hopkins to her she repeated it to him louder. "_ _ _What's it about?"__ _Dear lord would the boy ever stop?_

 _"_ _ _It's about this girl named Lizzy who's growing up and everything is changing around her she's confused about life boys, mates, school"__

 _" _Okay sounds too girlie to me perfect for you sis"__

 _" _Ah shut up you bugger off"__

 _" _Behave little girl or I shall tell mum your up to no good"__

 _" _I dare ya I'll tell her you been sneaking off at nights with that girl from Greece ya know thee one Mum can't stand Leithia"__

 _" _You wouldn't dare"__

 _" _Try me Bro"__

 _" _Your crafty Len"__

 _" _I know"__ _She giggled as I heard him sigh going off. Finally we were alone laying back down we both let out huge breaths of relief. After a few moments she crawled over to where the nightstand on her bed was opened the drawer and pulled out a black leather binded. Laying back in my arms she handed it to me. "_ _ _What is this sweet baby?" "It's my journal I named her envy" "Why envy?" "Why not?"__ _looking at her as she lit another joint up I shrugged sometimes I didn't get her "_ _ _Everyone thinks that me being a princess I have it all that I have nothing to fear want or need but the truth is we all need something we all want things, we all have fears"__ _Opening to the page she directed me to I smiled as I knew why she wanted me to read it now._

 _ **Envy**_

 _ **So ma**_ _ **ny emotions are swirling around inside of me I can't even start to keep them straight anymore. Last night was so amazing in so many ways. First I have to tell you something but you must swear on your last page Envy you shan't ever say anything to anyone tell no one what I am going to tell you. Last night I had my first date with a girl, her name is Lexi she's beautiful she's smart edgy rebellious but fecking amazing. I had to sneak out of thee palace which was shockingly easy Mum was hosting a charity event for a local hospital so the tunnels became my refugees.**_

 _**I was a bit scared at first I neve**_ _ **r did anything like this before ditching my guards but Lexi is worth it. It took almost a half hour to reach town but as soon as I did I felt exhilarated standing on the corner catching my breath. Lexi's smile alone was enough of a reason to feel breathless as soon as she came out of the pub and our eyes connected. The minute I saw her I felt my chest tighten all around us in the City of Westminster. I saw tons of teens most had jeans and tees on**_ _ **but not my sweet Lexi nope she had on the dopest sickest cargo pants I had ever seen they were basic black but going down the sides of the legs were old fashioned neon colored records. Despite it being thee end of October and breezy she still wore a black crop top**_ _ **with the words on it**_

 _" **Here's**_ _ **to**_ __ _ **the**_ __ _ **nights**_ __ _ **we**_ _ **don't**_ _ **remember**_ _ **and**_ _ **the**_ __ _ **friends**_ __ _ **we**_ __ _ **won't**_ _ **forget**_ _ **that showed off her most amazing flat abs her stomach is fierce. I mean you can see how hard she works to get this body.**_

 _ **We were both pretty nervous as we met up at the corner. I smiled watching her as she walked up to me damn was she ever sexy that top was so thin it barely covered her and if it rain her nipples would be on display for all of jolly old England; god I never wanted rain so bad in my life.**_

 _ **Her hair ever changing was shaved on her right side the rest dyed black with purple and pink neon highlights hanging over her left side three thick strands were braided. She looked hip sexy her walk was slaying me those amazing hips. Not wanting to be seen since those damn paps were always lurking around. I was wearing**_ _ **my tripp bondage straps steampunk black with some purple splattered in there. With a jawbreaker pin stripped buckle strap back top and a jawbreaker brocade jacket with a dessert queen hat and huge black, gold rayburns sunglasses.**_

 _ **We went to dinner at a place called the works which had amazing music and a DJ who she knew we shared a pizza and fries. Afterwards we rode the tube to southwest London where we went to her friends party which was held in a warehouse.**_

 _ **The music was pumping which set me at ease I love music of all kinds louder the better there weren't a ton of kids maybe ten to twenty but they all seemed older more mature. Still as scared as we were at first she took my hand and we dove right into the crowd. Someone called to her and we met up with the girl who belonged to the voice she introduced her as her friend Lucy who went to the university of Kingston where she's an arts major. She handed us two wine coolers as she drowned hers I didn't want to drink it I still had to get home in one piece but I didn't want to look uncool.**_

 _ **Lexi shrugged smiled at me and took a big gulp. I smelled the fruity flavors felt my mouth water it had been awhile since I drank so why not swallowing I took a sip the alcohol burned made my eyes water but but the flavors were amazing. Taking my hand Lexi pulled me to the dance floor fallout boy was playing I love this band their original unafraid to be themselves and have great tunes. Everyone seemed to be having fun talking drinking slowly no one was rushing the lights were neon spinning and added a sexy coolness to the whole atmosphere. As we danced I started to feel funny my body felt different it was almost like there was something brewing inside of me. I was sweating, I could feel drops of sweat forming against my lips, on the back of my neck. My whole body was tense every muscle stiff I felt like I was being strangled, was Lexi feeling like this? I tried to look at her but everything was blurring together. She was trying to talk to me but her words seemed to come out slow jammed together. I don't know why but I found it hysterical as I fell against her she wrapped her arms around my waist we moved our hips as one. I tried to read her shirt what did it say again? I couldn't stop laughing long enough to focus**_ _ **what was going on with me? I couldn't voice my concerns though because as soon as I looked up I saw her eyes I heard the guitar rifts and I lost it. Her eyes were glorious I saw clouds rolling down rivers into the most luxurious fields of heaven and I couldn't stop dancing jumping. I felt like I was flying I was flying high above any scene swinging my head as I shock my body, she was laughing we were falling.**_ _ **Spinning spinning so fast I don't know how I could still stand everything is so beautiful there's life all around me. I can feel it I can taste the lyrics I can hear every cord, every syllable so clearly I am now one with them.**_

 _ _ **We're only liars, but we're the best (we're the best)  
We're only good for the latest trends  
We're only good cause you can have almost famous friends  
Besides, we've got such good fashion sense**__

 _ **My senses were all alive I felt every heart beat I smelled every scent good ones like honey, cinnamon, fruits, bad ones sweat, vomit, someone's body odor. Yet I didn't feel sick I felt tranquilized by her eyes they were now two waves of intense beauty greens, blues, reds, yellows, like water when you try to skip stones they never sink yet they create ripples that are felt and seen for miles and miles. I wasn't here anymore I was far away I don't know where I was but I was somewhere beautiful there were gods, goddess dressed in pure sparkling gold sipping wine laying on**_ _ **beds with curtains surrounding them. I was dancing for them they were loving it I was laughing. I wasn't here anymore and I was loving it but no wait I was here I could see Lexi's smile as she spun god she had a tight ass. I saw Lucy dancing with some rocker type dude who was taller than her with a million tattoos and piercings I felt the vibrations of the music. I felt her lips on mine attacking mine her kiss sent me to another world.**_

 _ **Darkness had engulfed the entire city as I crawled into my bed which was now ocean waves of silk which I tossed and turned in them laughing.**_

 _ **I drifted off into a dream like state of sleep but heat waves over took me nothing cooled me off not till I tore off my clothes and was lying naked the silk against my bare sweaty skin felt well out of this world it was like being caressed by a million goddess. I gasped as they touched me in my most intimate of areas. I wished it was Lexi I imagined it was which sent me into balls of laughter.**_

 _ **I'm paying for it now though I woke with the most killer of headaches my tummy felt funny all day yet through it all I felt amazing I had kissed the girl I couldn't stop dreaming about and Envy I liked it I really liked it!**_

 _ **L**_ _ **e**_ _ **xi**_ _ **lat**_ _ **er t**_ _ **o**_ _ **l**_ _ **d**_ _ **me that the coolers had molly's slipped into them I didn't have a clue what the hell a molly was so I googled it. Found this which was a bit scary. Molly aka MDMA (3,4-methylenedioxy-methamphetamine), popularly known as ecstasy or, more recently, as Molly, is a synthetic, psychoactive drug that has similarities to both the stimulant amphetamine and the hallucinogen mescaline. It produces feelings of increased energy, euphoria, emotional warmth and empathy toward others, and distortions in sensory and time perception. I know I should feel ashamed scared but I can't I just feel amazing, last night I did things I never dreamed I'd have the guts to do, the results I got to spend an amazing night dancing laughing feeling free with a girl I really like. Where's the harm in that?**_

 _S_ _miling a_ _t Len I_ _l_ _ean_ _ed i_ _n I sh_ _are_ _d a kiss with her which was so sweet it was a better feeling than any molly could ever introduce._


	42. Chapter 42

**Eleanor**

 **Envy**

 **Yup That's how my day was I pretty much feel like a** **Arse biscuit** **the roles were announced** **I got thee role of Riz. I mean I was so happy I could of pissed myself. Except than they announced who would be playing Danny of all the fecking luck in the world of course it was Bryan. He really is a dodgy character. I mean part of me was relieved it gave me an excuse to talk to him. I should have been shaking from fear I mean this** **arsehole** ** **has spent months treating me like crap yet thankfully Gemma's pills were helping. I recently found out they were Molly's damn I really am starting to love this Molly chick. I pop two every morning two at lunch two to three during rep. I need my stigma to be up than at night. I take**** ** **two Benny's which mum keeps in her dresser I have to sneak in if she catches me she'd kill me. Benny's are amazing while Molly keeps me awake with her sexy illusions I can't help it I just love girls. Benny knocks me out always said boys make me snore. Anyway Mrs. Tanner had us come up and rehearse while she went to help some of the younger kids she left me alone with Bryan who's a year eleven so he has experience. We started out fine he was very p**** ** **rofessional**** ** **which I found amazing, than as we did some acting exercises to warm up to our characters he started to go back to his old Bryan ways.****

 ** **Teasing me asking me questions like why do you want to play a bad girl we all know your a prissy little good girl. He said things like I bet your still a virgin uh yeah dude I'm 14! Than he would try to stroke my hair but I pulled away so he would slap my arse.**** ** **I knew I should yell but I couldn't I needed those drugs or I would lose everything, than Mrs. Tanner asked us to go in back and grab some supplies.****

 ** **I'm crying now as I write this I don't want to recall any of it but I can't forget it. Envy it was awful! As soon as I asked him about the ice, he smirked and asked what I would do for it when I showed him the cash his grin got wider seconds later he locked the door to the supply closet his voice was deep when he said "**** ** _ **I don't want your money princess"**_** ** **I didn't understand what he meant than he unzipped his pants it all became clear. My mind was screaming**** ** _ **I need to go. I really need to go,**_** ** **"however those words carried no value to my feet which remained planted. My body felt so heavy, my muscles so weak. I needed those drugs and I knew I would have to do whatever he wanted if it meant keeping Lexi. My blood was boiling, my skin sweating; all of this seemed like a fever-induced hallucination.**** ** **Thanks Molly if it got me through I would never stop using her. I closed my lips lowered myself to his level and bit down as hard as I could. He moaned as I felt him stiffen. I was an innocent little 14 year old girl, I basically knew nothing about sex, but I knew this was wrong it felt it on so many levels. After it was over I felt so dirty so sick so violated yet I also felt guilty I didn't fight it. I should of I could of but I didn't.****

 ** **Envy I am sick still Bryan took so much pleasure from this but he took more than that he took my pride, my self assurance my security, dignity, but my dear uncle got his damn drugs. I wish I could talk to someone but how the hell do I do that when it's my fault I basically asked for it. When I gave Cyrus the drugs I also gave him the money of course he asked why, I told him and do you know what the draft fool asked? "Did you like it?" How could he even think? I feel sick my family is disgusting.****


	43. Chapter 43

**Eleanor**

 **Envy**

 **It gets worse everyday Uncle Cyrus has become so demanding not only does he now threaten me everyday he's taken to blackmailing me with evidence. The sick freak recorded Lexi and I when we were making out he is an animal a disgusting pig. He showed me the damn video god it made my skin crawl. Why dose one man need so many damn drugs? Now Bryan wants to take things to a whole new level. Everyday after Rep rehearsal I have rehearsals for the musical on stage we work well together he's the perfect Danny he's funny, smooth he moves great his voice is pure magic, he makes me forget he's Byron. I honestly fall so hard into Rizzo I see him as Danny. While we rehearsed the dance I don't feel scared when he's grabbing me pushing me against the car or the wall.**

 **Envy I have to confess the strangest thing happened last week while we were rehearsing we kept having to do the same scene over and over, Danny and Rizzo are flirting to make Sandy jealous he pressed me against the wall kissing my neck his hands are free styling along my body and I felt something I never felt before, my insides felt awakened and something happened to me down there. I don't know what it means I don't know why my nipples felt hard hell when did I even get them? My breathing became** **quicken** **ed down there I felt hot than I was wet in my panties. Did this mean I liked him? I was so confused. How could I if I liked girls?**

 **What makes it even more confusion is everyday Byron and I go to the storage room lock the door and he does whatever he wants to me. Envy I don't like when he touches me I hate having to do what I do just so Cyrus can get his drugs,** **if I don't though he'll tell mum.**

 **Envy some days I just want to say screw it and tell my parents if they knew what he was doing to me they'd kill him. Some days I just want to take my chances with whatever happens but I can't if I lose Lexi I would die. I've had the strangest life ever Envy I mean what other 14 year old can say they were born into the most famous family in the world, I had already visited twenty countries by the time I was seven. I was famous before I was even born People magazine paid over 0.66023 pounds for the first baby pictures of Liam and I. By the time we were 12 Liam and I** **had been on over 2,999 magazine covers worldwide, given countless interviews we've been invited to to most exclusive parties on yachts, mansions, from the richest people ever** **were going to parties all over the U.K getting drunk, we would get into the best clubs all because of who we were.**

 **There were times when we would party so hard we didn't go to school the next day. Yet no one ever did anything about it if they did question Mum and dad would pay them off or threaten them I mean they are the ruling monarchy who's going to go against them? So I guess I shouldn't be shocked I am where I am now. When I look back at it all I am so damn tired of it all. I'm tired of hiding who I am I want to be free to be with Lexi. It hurts so damn bad. As cruel as Cyrus is though he also is the only person who understands. Lately he''s been giving me ice to help me escape. It soothes me it makes me feel dead, I'm starting to like that feeling.** **Last night we talked at great lengths.** **I don't know why I bother he hates me, but who else is there to talk to? If I tell Lexi she will kill both of them. I miss her so bad I haven't been able to see her she's been busy with school and helping her family. Plus security here is so tight I know something is going on. Cyrus won't tell me he just told me to pray and stay drugged up so I don't think.**

 **Sometimes my uncle is a genius a creepy perverted sick twisted arsehole but a genius.** **Drugs are amazing!**


	44. Chapter 44

**Eleanor**

 **Dear Envy**

 **Tonight was fabulous Kit took me out as an early Christmas present he is so sweet of course I had to lie to mum. I told them Unity and I were working on a project for school and I was going to her house. Mum is so busy planning this Christmas Gala she barely looked up just blew me a few air kisses. It's nice to be off punishment but I wish she at least acted like she gave a damn. She didn't ask any questions just waved me off while talking to Rachel and Luscious. Dad wasn't even around he's out of the country. At least I didn't have to lie to him Envy I hate lying to him I always feel like I am betraying him.**

 **It's all worth it though once I got to Kit's we popped a few molly's than sneaked out the bog's window ran across his backyard cut across the neighbor's house that is behind his where Lexi was waiting in her car. I was so happy to see her I threw my arms around her neck kissing her glorious face. Her laughter was like rainbows lighting up my dark soul. I'm sure my security is pissed but who cares all I care about is being with Lexi, Kit. He's been such a dream partner helping me with my pointe but damn do my feet ever hurt their a big bloody mess. I wasn't sure how I was even going to dance tonight.**

 **Kit to my rescue again I was in so much pain dancing** **when he slipped me some acid. There's something magical about taking acid with your closet friends it's a bond no one can measure up to. Lexi didn't take any she said she would be our** **shaman** **which I discovered meant someone who is a non dropping friend basically a babysitter. Everything was so colorful I could of danced forever I felt no pain. I just laughed like crazy grabbed Kit and Lexi while we grinded and danced up against each other and everyone else in the club which was so vibrant so alive with energy.**

 **The beats were killer Lexi had her arms around me** **kissing my neck** **her kisses felt like fireworks exploding on my neck my insides were on fire. I wanted to rip her clothes off and have my way with her on every surface but she still refused to take things to the next level yet. I respected her for that most days but tonight I felt like I was dying. Everything blurred together I swear people had three heads. I felt like I was in one of those kaleidescope, faces took on masks which became animals everything closed in on me. I felt like there were bugs crawling on my skin. I was so hot I couldn't breathe, I felt alone. My fingers were huge colorful I swear there were rainbows shooting from them. I tried to catch them but they were too fast I yelled I chased them but I didn't know where I was so I started panicking.**

 **Than some group came on stage and I spotted one of the members she had the most loveliest of hair colors it was like** **cotton candy. I wanted it I wouldn't stop till I was eating it but as hard as I tried I couldn't get to it everything was so blurry everyone was so pushy. She just seemed so far away I tried following her voice but I ran into every obstetrical I could diamonds were falling from the sky hitting my face cutting me, I swatted but they kept coming their brilliant lights were blinding me, bees hundreds of them angry all coming at me. Wait no they weren't bees they were titians they were grabbing at me their huge heavy hands trying to crush me, where was she? Where was she? I needed that cotton candy I craved that sweetness!**

 **Everything is blurry from tonight I don't recall how we got into a different room but we were Kit had a bong which he was passing around, some boy was passing a joint I didn't know him but he offered it to me. Who was I to refuse? I laughed seeing my hands shooting shamrocks wait don't leave if you leave how will I find my pot of gold! You had to lead me to my rainbow!**

 **It was wild Envy I swear we somehow ended up back at Kit's place Lexi had fallen asleep along with Brett who I later discovered was Kit's boyfriend. It just left Kit and I up as we came down from our high.** **Laying together we talked and talked from everything about school how hard it was getting yet how much we loved it to how our parents were, I never realized just how little support he had at home. Kit is always so positive so proud even his room is so colorful so vibrant Lady gaga posters all over the walls, Elton John's lgbt flags a few posters of random cute half naked boys. Boy band posters, Billy Elliot ones. He told me all about how his parents had told him he was a fool it was a phrase they were ashamed of him. They didn't approve of his boyfriend. It's all so unfair why can't parents just let us be?**

 **Everything seems so bleak now when just hours before I was partying like a crazed person now all I wanted to do was cry bury myself in my bed. I feel sick no one ever tells you how coming down sucks.**


	45. Chapter 45

**Eleanor**

 **Envy**

 **Molly's are amazing! Life however is horrible! I am still shaking now I can't believe everything that has happened. I don't know where to start today started pretty normal. I popped two Molly's before school and felt clam it's pretty cool how a little pill makes you see life in such different perspectives, I noticed things I would have never saw before like how cute Damian looked with his longer hair how his dimples come out when he's smiling trying to play cool when he's really nervous. Why am I seeing these things now? We've been dating for months yet today is the first time I noticed how he pays attention only to me when I am talking no one else how he puts me first asking if I need food or water or a rest when were rehearsing never himself. I must be a horrible person. I couldn't focus in rep today I just seem to lag so I popped three more I don't think this is safe, I'm sort of scared but I feel okay now. After I popped them man did I ever fly my dancing was so on point, Mrs. Ruska even congratulated me!**

 **After school we went to celebrate since today was the last till the new year. We went to this place called Teen dream it's new man it has everything any kid could want from bowling alley's to dance floors, to swimming pools, weight rooms, art rooms, a restaurant. Lexi and I were hanging in the swimming pool along with Kit, Damian and Brett, Unity, Liam, Gemma, Ashok, Holden. It was so hard not to hold Lexi's hand but I had to play the role Damian held me in his arms. I know Lexi was burned up over it she couldn't look me in my eyes she was huffing every time Damian whispered something in my ear. Lexi and I spent all three hours trying to find ways to be alone going to the bog so many times people started to wonder if we had some kind of infection, lol yeah we do it's called hormones their a right bitch. Grabbing snacks making sure no one was around when we sneaked kisses touches glances. Even going under water just so we could touch each others hands or play footsies. Yet Damian was oblivious he bragged to his mates how perfect I am how much we love each other.**

 **I feel like shit when I hear him proclaim all this I mean I can't take my eyes off how sexy Lexi looks in her tight black bikini how amazing her breasts are how her hair is so wet so shiny. I can't help reaching out touching it wanting to kiss her face while her amazing eyes drink me in. I can't touch her! I need drugs.**

 **I felt so torn when I got home here it is Christmas eve I have an amazing boyfriend and an incredible sexy girlfriend, an okay family money yet I felt sick, my heart was heavy I know what I am doing is wrong but I can't stop! Why can't I just tell the truth? I should I know. How can I though when it means breaking his heart? He's gentle he's smart he's funny he makes me feel good but Lexi makes me feel alive.**

 **As life would have it I didn't have much of a choice. When we got out of the Establishment we saw Marcus standing with another guard who wasn't Jack. Marcus informed us Jack was let go because I kept giving him the slip so now I have another guard his name is Jason he's young like Marcus he's built his eyes are stone cold he hasn't said a word to me unless I ask a question. I can't even go to the bog alone now he follows me inside. This is so unfair! How am I suppose to be alone?**

 **I thought things were bad on the ride home but boy was I so wrong. We were barely in the door when mum screamed at me to get into the sitting room. I was nervous what now?**

 **Did she raid my room find my stash? I was in a hurry and didn't have time to hide it as well as I could of. I wish Envy I wish that was all there was, I'm crying again as I write this. Mum threw a photo at me as soon as I came inside, it was from today some pap had taken it from inside the locker room Lexi and I were almost naked in the shower holding each other kissing. Someone is blackmailing us if Mum and dad don't pay 50,1000,900GBP they will post the picture all over social media they claim they have more as well. I can't even swallow or breathe what pictures do they have? Tears were streaking down my face as Mum screamed at me.**

" _How could you Eleanor?" "Your a disgrace! This is wrong! It's disgusting!_ _How could you be so stupid? "This is not my daughter this is not the young lady I raised. I raised a daughter who was smart who was respectful who knew the cost of living such a public life, what happened to that little girl? Who corrupted you? I raised you to be a lady not a dyke or a butch this is an abomination one we need to fix immediately."_ **Mum's voice was cold hateful I had never heard her with such venom in her voice such disgust in her eyes. "** _You make me sick Eleanor I will never be okay with you being a homo. I don't know who you are but I want you to go to church tonight and I want you on your hands and knees you better_ _p_ _ray that god can cure this sickness this disease because so help me god Eleanor if you even think about seeing that slut ever again. I will beat the shit out of you until your bleeding and raw,_ Mum was inches away from my face as I Coward in front of the fireplace tears coming in waves of gasping fear.

" _You will not ruin this family our image or the life I have spent 14 years building just so you can experiment_ _you made a choice to be this way"_

" _No Mum it isn't a choice!"_ I finally found my voice even thought it was weak. " _Why would I chose this life Mum? Why would I chose to live a life where I am shamed, humiliated beaten for being who I am why would I chose to live knowing people will hate me for being myself, knowing I can never have the same rights like everyone else knowing I can't be with someone I love because she's a she not a he not being allowed to marry have the same medical, legal rights as a straight person"_

" _Because your stupid Eleanor your a drama queen you love to have the spotlight you always have to upstage me you know I hate people like you yet you know I have to get the people's votes you think his little stunt will get the people to feel sorry for you you think you'll gain sympathy for your pathetic little cause you think that little lying hussy loves you your delusional she's only after you for your name your money she doesn't give two shits about you"_

" _Lexi does love me!"_

" _Bullocks Eleanor_ _she doesn't love you no one could love a freak like you stop lying to yourself to everyone you know_ ** _this is a choice!_** _You weren't born this way let me tell you something you little bitch,_ Mum slapped me so hard I fell into the fireplace thank god it wasn't on. My screams brought Liam running along with Marcus. I laid on the ground covering my face shaking so violently I felt ill,

" _Get your hands off her mum!"_

" _Stay out of this Liam your sister deserves to get her ass beating if she's going to be a perverted faggot she will get what's coming to her!"_ **Liam grabbed me stepping in front of me as Mum raised her hand again. Marcus stood in front of us as Liam glared at mum and helped me out. I was crying so hard I couldn't stop shaking his arms were the only thing keeping me up my knees were weak my mind cloudy Grey. Everything I had feared would happen did just happen. Mum hated me Liam's arms held me strong as he carried me to his room holding me while I bawled rubbing my back. It took almost two hours before him and Marcus could calm me down enough to talk. Giving me some water to help my dry throat Marcus wrapped his arms around me slipping me a sleeping pill to calm me, Liam however was almost as hysterical. He kept asking question after question.**

" _Why was Mum so mad? What happened? Why did she hit you Len? Are you pregnant? Are you on drugs? Did you fail a subject? I've never seen mum so damn mad, Len your my sister talk to me we always tell each other everything were twins I love you there's nothing in this world that can make me hate you" "Mum hates me Liam why wouldn't you?"_

" _Because I am not mum you have to trust me Len I will help you with what ever you need" "Liam please do you mean that?"_ Liam's hands cupped my face as he brought my chin up to his face tears clouded my vision but I could feel how gentle yet firm his grip was. "I'm… _Liam I'm bisexual...Mum found out.. she hates me now she said I am a disgrace she'll never love me again"_

 **The tears started all over as Liam held me rocking my body slowly his own eyes filled with tears**. " _Len I don't care your still the same awesome amazing funny talented crazy beautiful sister you were my whole life I will always love and support you Mum can piss off"_

 **His words were like angels lifting me up how could Liam be so accepting and Mum so hateful? Envy I am so confused I am so drained if this wasn't hard enough Damian came over and mum told him everything. The look in his eyes told me how hurt he was the worst part was his mum kicked him out because he refused to break up with me. We were in the middle of a fight when guards burst in grabbing us. I was so scared they lead us through the tunnels locking us in a panic room. Dad was there he looked so pale shaken I was afraid mum had told him I couldn't take his hate to.** **Oh Envy I only wish it was that! It's worse Robert my sweet Robbie was shot today someone tried to murder him, he's in a coma and we don't know who did it. Mum Wouldn't tell me anything of course she wouldn't look at me she threw me into one of the bedrooms and told me to stay out of her sight. I curled up on the bed weeping who would do such a thing? Why? Robert's only a teen he's no threat to anyone. Would he be okay? I was shaking I felt so cold so very cold. I couldn't stop vomiting or crying. Hearing footsteps I looked up excepting to see Liam but it wasn't it was my uncle. He just shock his head told me I was the most pathetic animal he had ever shot, than he threw a little vile at me and told me to snort the powder and I would feel better. I had no idea what it was but he showed me how to do it. After two hits I felt amazing. Laying back against the bed he handed me a joint why he opened his arms for me I honestly have no clue, but beggars couldn't be picky.**

" _Len let me tell you something dear niece it may seem pretty shitty now but it won't always be this way everyone deserves to be respected for who they are. Your mum she's in shock right now see when parents have kids they set these high expectations for who they are to be, it's normal for any family but add royalty to it well that's a whole new level of expectations,_ _growing up isn't easy dear but you are a Henstridge that means your a rare breed that's use to fighting against hopeless useless battles._

 _Your life will get better not by chance though by change you will hurt Len you will hurt so fucking bad you may think it'll never get easier never find hope or beauty but if you hold on if you fight Len it will get better YOU will get stronger, than life will suck again eventually it'll get better and suck some more that's why we have these babes_ He gave me the joint again _it's a big old circle but it can be beautiful wonderful funny awesome, you need to be here to see it though"_

" _Don't give up on Helena she's a strong feisty passionate devoted woman she's set in her ways but she loves you kids, she has so much on her plate now she just doesn't understand any of this you have to make her understand you have to make her see that you are still the amazing funny, creative, smart, awesome Eleanor you have always been, she hasn't walked in our shoes Len she can't comprehend how we feel maybe she never will but she will love you just give her time, she will open her eyes and see she still has an amazing daughter, unlike my dimwitted fruit loop dinguses" "Just remember there's always hope there's always help. I suppose I have to find someone else to get my drugs now but in all seriousness Len hang in there you Robert Liam your fighters and you'll need it cause I intend to fight you for that throne"_

 **Leave it to Uncle Cyrus to be witty funny charming and threating all at the same time. Now if only Robert can hear him he has to stay strong!**


	46. Chapter 46

**Damian**

" _If you intend on staying with that slag than you can get the hell out of my house! I put this roof over your head I put the meals on your plate if you can't live by my rules than you can live on the streets for all I care" "OUT!"_

My mother's words hung in my head as I paced the throne room in the palace how could I have been so stupid? So foolish as to think the princess of England would ever be contempt with me a simple commoner. My heart was pacing faster than my feet or my mind. I felt like she had punched me straight into the gut. All the many emotions felt like a hailstorm of pain. Did I do something wrong? Not pay enough attention to her? I thought I did I mean I know it was tough to see each other but I was doing as much as I could between school rehearsals and working in both my mum's shop as well as my second job at the mall. Still we made time to date every Friday I always tried to think of different ideas for date nights. I showered her with flowers, poems, kisses we texted all the time we talked. I always held her hands carried her books. I did everything I could think of to make her feel special. I guess I just wasn't good enough.

Looking around this room I saw all kinds of portraits from the centuries past her grandparents their parents her aunts, uncles, cousins, people who I have read about in history class. Alfred the Great who defended his kingdom against the vikings. Lady Jane Grey had an excellent humanist education and a reputation as one of the most learned young women of her day. A committed Protestant, she was posthumously regarded as not only a political victim but also a martyr. Mary I was the Queen of England, Ireland from July 1553 until her death. Her executions of protestants led to the posthumous sobriquet"Bloody Mary". William III of England William's reputation as a strong Protestant enabled him to take the British crowns when many were fearful of a revival of Catholicism under James. William's final victory at the Battle of the Boyne in 1690 is still commemorated by the orange order. His reign in Britain marked the beginning of the transition from the personal rule of the Stuarts to the more parliament- Centered rule of the House of Hanover. " _Son I am so sorry I just heard myself"_ Turning to see King Simon standing there I felt myself blush hanging my head in shame how stupid must he think I am? How could I have not seen it? " _Don't blame yourself Damian this isn't your fault Len is very confused your both young still trying to figure things out which I know offers little comfort to you son"_ King Simon's hand rested on my shoulder " _You have every right to feel angry, violated hurt but don't blame yourself I am sure you were as caring, committed and devotional as anyone your age could be Len is just confused" "Your welcome to stay here as long as you need to till you figure things out" "I'm sorry about your mum but we have invited her over she's willing to talk shall we?"_ I nodded feeling scared why would she care now?

I bet she was chuffed to bits over this. How could he be so kind to me when I was so angry at Len shouldn't he be taken her side? " _Damian make no mistake I love my daughter to bits she is my everything all my kids are that doesn't mean I approve of what she did." "Or who she did it with" "No son that doesn't bother me I could care less if she's with a girl, a boy, both gay, straight, bisexual she's my daughter I will always love and accept her" "As soon as things are settled with you I will talk to her"_

We entered the red dinning room where my mum was standing looking miffed I knew she didn't want me anymore even if Len and I were now broken up she still could care less about me. " _Mrs. Grant thank you for agreeing to meet with me I am sure it's been a rough few days" "Yes it has King I am a very busy I have little time for chin wag so if you would please get to the point in all of this"_ Queen Helena entered looking daggers at my mum.

" _That was a bit rude we invite you to our palace take care of your son when you throw him out my husband has gone to great lengths to see to it that your son has someone to look out for him the least you can do is bow to your king and take a few moments to hear him out"_

My mum huffed as King Simon motioned for me to sit down. I watched her expression change as soon as Queen Helena entered she now started to look nervous looking down at the floor but Queen Helena wasn't frazzled she simply motioned for one of the servant girls to bring in some appetizers while we sat. " _I suggest you take a good long hard look at your son Ma'am he is a very devoted caring young man who puts his whole heart into everything everyone if you can fault him for something as pure and selfless as that than perhaps god has made a mistake in given you such a precious gift Children are to be cherished not thrown away like pieces of expired meat"_

" _With all due respect my Queen but my son is my problem not yours"_

" _Correction Mrs. Grant everyone in this kingdom are my people my people my problem I take it very seriously when someone mistreats my children in my kingdom so I suggest you start to learn some simple facts one Children make mistakes, that's how they learn that is how they grow, Two their lives are their lives not ours to control or criticize"_

" _Look Queen if your so invested in Damian's life than you take him I raised him, I loved him I provided for him these last thirteen years this is the thanks I get forget it he's not worth it no money in the world is"_ My heart sank as she got up gave me a side cast and walked out. Did she just tell the queen and king of England that I wasn't worth it. I couldn't speak or move hell my brain had just completely shut down. Queen Helena escorted her out the look on her face haunted me there was something in her eyes that made me question what her motives were.


	47. Chapter 47

**Queen Helena**

" _You were given one simple job Castillo one damn job that was to take the baby and get the hell out of England" "You couldn't even do that!" Why on god's green earth would you stay here knowing that someday Damian would get old enough he would ask questions someday there would be a chance that he would run into us which could lead to more questions he would want answers" "You were given orders all you had to do was follow them but as usual commoners are just to draft to ever do anything correctly" "Lucius take this fool away" "What shall I do with her your majesty?" "Whatever the hell it is you do to distinguish rats"_ Lucius bowed as he grabbed the woman by her arm roughly she was speechless now as she stared at me.

" _What do you plan to do with me?"_ I didn't waver as I moved closer to her so I was directly in her face. " _Well seeing as you screwed up the one and only job I ever gave you your useless to me now what happens next is up to him"_ I nodded to Lucius as I walked away followed by Rachel.

" _Queen Helena what shall we do about the boy?"_

" _He must be taken care of before he starts to ask too many questions I will see to it that he is dealt with"_

" _As you wish if there is anything you need"_

" _I know Rachel I will ask there is one thing check on Eleanor make sure she is in her room god only knows what trouble she'll get us all into next" "Your wish is my command"_

Rachel curtsied as she hurried on there are some people you can count on but most are incompetent fools. Why was beheading ever out ruled things would be so much more simple if you could just behead people but no people are to closed minded these days every one has to have a fair trail. I say off with their heads. As far as I am concerned she's guilty off with her head.


	48. Chapter 48

**Damian**

Looking around I was amazed by how impressive this room was. I figured it was called The Royal Gold Bedroom the bed was King Sized with Red and gold bedding. Two couches a grand mirror three chairs a fireplace with a chandelier and a vanity. One could get use to this easily. Makes me wonder why some people are born to wealth some poor, did we ever get to chose our path? What would happen now? Where would I go? Would I have to drop out of school?

I was once so certain about my future now it all seemed like a mystery. All because I fell for Eleanor's lies no wonder why my mum tried to warn me about them. They really did only think of themselves if I had just listened to her maybe I would still have a home. Sighing I got up heading to the bathroom why would she do it though? Didn't I mean anything to her? Glancing at her room I heard some shouting coming from a few doors down sounded like the Queen and The King arguing. Should I go see Len? I gasped as hands clamped over my mouth and arms lifted me up who the hell? I struggled but who ever had grabbed me was stronger bigger. Someone injected me with something as darkness enclosed around me.


	49. Chapter 49

**Eleanor**

 **Envy**

 **We did it! We escaped! As I am writing to you I sit here in a church pew on Christmas day in Des Moines** **Iowa** **. That's right last night when Mum, Dad were fighting I contacted Lexi, Kit I was so upset. I could hear Mum telling my dad I was out of control. I was a disgrace to the monarchy, I needed to learn my place in the world in this family. She wanted to send me away to a boarding school that has therapists that specialize in treating mentally ill kids who practice** **reparative** **therapy.** **There was no way in hell I was allowing that to happen, when will Mum learn I can't be cured this isn't some phrase. I am who I am and I am proud of myself. Sighing I looked to Lexi who was curled up besides me on the pew we were getting some rest while Kit was in the confession booth. I can't believe we did it but we did as soon as I texted Lexi she was furious over what my mum had said and did she started crying. She kept apologizing blaming herself but why I don't understand she didn't cause my mum's hatred or ignorance. All I knew was I couldn't stand one more day behind these Castle walls I needed to be free one way or another I was leaving.**

 ** **It was pretty scary slightly sad sneaking off in the middle of the night but I did what had to be done. Eleven pm my parents were still fighting but the guards surrender by ten pm very few staff remains. Rachel had done her nightly check on me so it was now or never. Packing what I needed only I stopped by to say goodbye to Liam which I was hesitant about he would try to stop me I knew it. Still I couldn't not say goodbye he's my twin my other half. Sneaking through the halls I held my breath. I wanted to talk to Damian but there wasn't time to spare beside he probably hated me maybe if I gave him time he would calm down than we could talk. No one was around which made this as easy as it could ever be. Standing outside his door I took a deep breath**** ** **pushing open his door the bond between twins is a unique one on so many levels. Being born together and sharing the same milestones throughout life is not something that most of us people will ever truly relate to. Imagine having a "built-in" best friend, Liam has been mine through my whole life. We were born only four minutes apart Liam being the older believe me he never lets me forget it to of course it's all in good fun cause at the end of the day he is always there for me.****

 ** **This would be the hardest goodbye I have ever said I didn't know how I would do it. Slowly so it wouldn't creak I opened the heavy doors but after only a few pushes I stopped hearing moans that weren't his. What the hell was he doing? Carefully I peeked in instantly**** ** **I wished**** ** **I hadn't cause I saw Liam naked on top of Gemma so that was who was moaning. Gross.****

 ** **C**** ** **losing the door I hurried down the hall not stopping to see anybody else just going through the tunnel I had to be sneaky I know Ted's men patrol**** ** **every ten minutes. Once I got to the edge of the property I paused looking back. Goodbye palace the only home I had ever known, Goodbye family even if you hate me I love you.****

 ** **Lexi borrowed her cousins car and picked up Kit and Brett before we drove to the bank where I withdrew**** ** **78,993.60 GBP**** ** **taking a deep nervous breath before running back to the car where they were waiting pretty nervous as well. Kit thought it would be best if we drove to Leicester Airport which was an hour and fifty seven minutes away. I honestly felt like throwing up so many chances of being noticed if someone spotted us we were dead in the water. Luckily we were able to make it with no traffic and caught a flight within an hour, by the time**** ** **anyone would notice we were all gone we'd be on American soil.****

 ** **Right now I am so exhausted I'm scared I have no idea where we will go we spent almost 15 hours on two planes with one layover in**** ** **Edinburgh**** ** **than when we got to Seattle Washington we bought a used car a 2003 Jaguar X type 2.5 Lexi drove**** ** **straight through 27 hours. My mind was spinning with so many worries so much doubt now where would we live? How would we make money? A**** ** **fter Lexi bought the tickets with my money we had a lot less left than I thought. The tickets cost 2,018,520 leaving us with 4,025,040 we caught a metro bus to Seattle**** ** **which cost 10 for all of us the car cost us 4,590. now we had 4,020,450 left. I wish I could sleep but I just couldn't relax. Kit and Brett just came out of confession I hope they didn't tell what we did, I mean I know the priests are bounded by confidently but are there limits?****

 ** **Outside the church we held hands as we walked through the city**** ** **which was covered in lights of all colors some twinkling some motionless. Music played through speakers there's something special about Christmas that always fills my whole body with a special warmth. Looking around as I watched little kids running around laughing, as they chased each other parents who sat sipping hot coco or coffee as their kids skated or played in the snow throwing snowballs.**** **** ** **Christmas Carolers sung about good tidings**** ** **merry greetings. All around I saw wonderful sights smelled amazing food as families cooked out in the open. It was all so heartwarming. Than as darkness came the people scattered leaving their litter behind we huddled together as we tried to find shelter inside an old dirty bus station. The wind was sharp the snow made the atmosphere damp we stopped just to try to get warm but it made it only worse. So we kept moving keeping a close eye/ grip on our bags cuddled as close together as we could. I envied those people who had homes to keep them warm. Yet I couldn't feel sorry for myself after all I chose to leave.****

 ** **We kept going even though our legs ached the cold tore through our clothes.**** ** **Finding shelter wasn't easy but we found an ally way curled up there in each others arms. "**** ** _I'm not sorry we left Len I know this looks bleak but were together and were in love that's all that counts"_** ** **Were in this together that's right wait did she just say she was in love with me?****

 ** **Love she**** ** __** ** **loved me? My heart**** ** __** ** **skipped a beat as I laid my head down on her chest looking up into her eyes. Love really could warm even the coldest bodies.**** **** ****


	50. Chapter 50

**Eleanor**

 **Envy**

 **It's been two weeks now we've slept in Ally's in cardboard boxes it's been frigid cold rainy snowy, smelly we've spent most of the days in Library's and youth centers trying to keep warm come up with some kind of plan while trying to remain low key. Finally we got a small dingy apartment were trying to save money but we have someplace warm to lay down our heads. We have a fireplace which we filled with wood till we can get electric and heat hooked up. Lexi thank god looks so much older than sixteen so she had little trouble finding someone to get us fake Id's which she used to get an agent so we could rent this place. I'm not sure what she had to do but I knew it involved a lot of paper work. Everyday were out hunting for jobs it's so cold I can see my breath when I breathe out. So far no luck they just look at us like they know were too young or not responsible enough. I'm scared our funds are running low we bought cleaning supplies food we sent every ounce of free time trying to clean this place up were so tired at night we just fall into the bedding we've made out of sleeping bags and cardboard boxes. Were searching thrift shops second hand shops for beds or couches but we don't want to draw attention to ourselves or spend everything else we have.**

 **Envy**

 **I got a job! I got a job! I'm a waitress now at a bar in downtown Illinois it's hard work the men are nasty but it's work which means I am making money. My boss's name is John he's kind of a creep I swear I saw him staring at me while I changed today. Gross he is a total pig but he gave me this job so I have to be grateful for that. My head hurts when I come home in the mornings it's so loud inside the bar it makes me dizzy. The bar's sleazy but it's always packed my first week I made $300 I was so happy! Lexi took me out to celebrate we walked along the river and laid under the stars cuddling kissing it was so lovely Envy to be free to not be afraid of being spotted.**

 **Envy**

 **We were robbed! This is horrible I am shaking we came home today to see our door broken down all our stuff was gone. Were homeless again it hurts to say it but it's true were back to sleeping under bridges our money is gone. Were freezing dirty we panhandled today didn't make anything just spare change not enough to even get a cup of coffee, were spit on harassed given dirty looks. It's embarrassing to have to dig into a dumpster to get food but that's what were doing just to survive. I know no one would feel sorry for me. I left an amazing home but as horrible as this is I wouldn't trade my old life because there I wasn't free to be with Lexi. I would trade everything to be with her. Tonight were lying under a drippy old creaking bridge along with twenty or so more runaways throwaway teens and kids, we didn't speak to each other it was too cold to move my lips. Lexi and I had our arms wrapped around each other kissing touching anything to get warmth to our bodies. Brett and Kit were laying on top of each other cuddled under a sleeping bag. Brett's been fighting a bad cold so we let them have the bag. I'm on guard all the time we have so little but what we have I will keep close. The scariest part are the damn birds they squawk and poop all night long. Gross this rain won't let up either.**

" _Want a puff"_ **I looked over to see a girl around our age with big puffy rainbow hair wearing a jean jacket she held out her joint. Lexi smiled at her as she took it nodding her thanks. "** _I'm Lexi thanks" "Welcome I'm seawise"_ **we looked at her she shrugged**

" _Don't know my real name anymore I was five when I was kicked out of my home my mum found me kissing my neighbor what can I say she was cute. Mum flipped out kicked me out._ _I sneaked onto a boat that was carrying cargo. Been traveling by sea for years now sneaking on when I was younger but as I got older I learned how to work on ships so fisherman started hiring me cheap labor all I asked for was a ride and some food. Been to countless cities."_

" _Sounds kind of cool"_

" _Yea it's alright better than being at home and beaten mum hates homo's. I've accepted my sexuality for awhile now, this is my mate angel he was kicked out by his step dad what a prick he use to come in and do things to him so he left"_ Angel looked so young maybe 12 or 10, " _He told me that gays will burn in hell yet he did all these nasty things to me, I was still the disgusting one he is an asshole"_

 **We didn't say any more we just smoked the remaining joint which did little to warm me but it did calm me. Why would parents be so cruel? They were suppose to love us protect us yet here we all were we weren't bad kids we didn't do bad things. We just chose not to let society live our lives for us, I wasn't going to let them tell me who I could or couldn't love so for that I guess I have to give up some things food, shelter, a warm bed clothes, safety, dignity. It'll be worth it in the end Envy right?**

 **Envy**

 **Today Angel, Kit and I did some things I never want to have to think about ever again! Never mind relive it but I feel I have to put them down so maybe someday someone will understand how desperate we are. Were no longer in Des Moines now we caught a ferry thanks to Seawise's skills in three weeks we've been in Illinois, Denver, New Mexcio, now were in La. We were just huddled together trying to stay warm when we were stopped by these young men who said they thought we were beautiful and wanted to take us to a party. They didn't look much older than us so we figured why not. Boy were we wrong it was a rave and they expected us to work it we ended up dealing to kids younger than us it was scary. I felt so dirty but than again these kids were going to use no matter what. I might as well prosper from it. We made $200 a piece. Than Angel, Kit and I we were lead into a back room and we were forced to do these old men. Gross Kit was so upset he cried in my arms all night over it. He was a virgin before this. Thank god I didn't have to go that far! I'd kill myself.**

 **Drugs are the only thing getting me through the days, nights we dropped acid, we smoked meth, snorted coke. Whatever we can afford whenever we can afford it. It doesn't really numb me anymore it just gets me through. Any food we find we share among each other it doesn't last long were always hungry, cold. The only nights I am warm are the ones I spend in some apartment in some part of the city giving a blowy it's gross, I vomit afterwards every time. Yet it's what I have to do just to get through.**

 **Lexi got a job at a high end escort service I hate it! It makes me sick these men crawling all over my girlfriend! But she banks good money. We need money to get by. So someday we won't have to do these awful things.**

 **Skidrow it's scary it's not safe people will try to rob you in a heartbeat not that we have anything to be taken. There's gunfire all the time, I feel safer in a group though than by myself. The only good thing is drugs are everywhere. I took for granted what I had like making a midnight snack when I was hungry, when I was cold I had plenty of blankets to chose from, I had staff that would get me whatever I needed.**

 **Now I have just myself to depend on it's difficult. This is no place for a kid but it's my life now. We've met other kids I don't bother to learn their names but in the last few weeks I've seen five kids die from the outside elements disease, starvation two got shot some just vanish I assume their killed while working at night. I don't get to know them well to me they give me access we pass along the bottles of beer, wine, we share joints.**

 **Kit and I were talking today how sad it is that we both come from privilege families yet we mean so little to them. You would think the princess of england being missing would grant some media attention, the son of a parliament member also being missing would get some but nothing. We even checked the Internet at the library. It really brought us down I mean sure my mum and I don't really see eye to eye but my dad. I guess it's true he hates gays,. Lexi and Brett wanted to cheer us up so they took us to a concert in the park. The music was off the hook the booze was free flowing. Lexi kept the shots coming, we did so much that I lost track of everything. I vaguely remember feeling sick and dizzy.**


	51. Chapter 51

**Damian**

" _Who are you! Why are you doing this!"_

I pounded on the door scared shit-less why would someone do this to me? How many weeks have I been here? No one will tell me anything. I have only seem two guys both around their late twenties. Their emotionless come in push a food tray at me and leave, come back twenty minutes later take it away. They only give me paper service no way of even trying to get out of here. I have small bathroom with no window. The food is nasty I barely touch it. The room is colorless small and cold. The bed has only a sheet and thin cover I freeze at night. I know my banging and yelling won't get any answers it never does. The worst part is knowing no one will care if I am missing. My mum kicked me out my dad is none existing, Len hates me. Wait Lavina! She has to notice I am missing but how will she know where to find me?


	52. Chapter 52

**Lavina**

" _Lets recap what we know guys we know their not together, we know she's with Lexi, Kit, Brett, we know someone took Damian but we can't get a facial recognizing that's where you come in Holden"_

Liam turned to his friend holden who's basement we were in music was blasting Ashok had a joint he was passing around as we crowded around Holden's laptop. I know Liam was very nervous if he was caught taking these surveillance videos he would be in so much trouble. "

 _No worries mate I promise I'll get what you need will bring our Len home"_

" _Lavina what we need to help you is information we need to figure out who took him why?"_

" _Have you heard from his mum?"_

" _No she's been out of dodge ever since he was kicked out she hasn't even been at work" "So their home is vacant?"_

" _Yeah why?"_

" _I think we need to start there but whoever took him could be watching"_

" _Okay I'll go no one will suspect if I'm there"_

" _Not alone it's dangerous I'll go with you Lavina"_ My heart beat just a little harder as I heard Liam speak up.

I didn't think he meant now but he did so I found myself alone with him in the back of the car. I was so nervous I mean he's the prince of england. Liam wasn't talking much but I could see how worried he was about Len

" _You love her a lot don't you?"_

" _She's my twin of course I do I just feel so guilty she's been going through hell and I had no idea I should have been there"_

" _If she wanted your help she would of told you Liam don't blame yourself"_

" _Can I ask you something?"_

" _Sure anything thanks for the help"_

" _Of course Liam so what do you see in the likes of Gemma?"_

He laughed I couldn't see his face with the darkness but I felt his whole body shake with laughter. " _She's high society it isn't a matter of me liking her I have to get along it's what's expected of me"_

" _Don't you ever wonder what it would be like to go against the exception?"_

" _Sometimes but no not really why?"_

" _I mean it's why your sister left so she could live life by her own terms"_

" _Yea she had her reasons but I've never really had any to rebel against"_

" _I could give you one"_

Before he could say no I pulled myself up to his level kissing him. There are things that simply can not be explained. There simply are no words. And a first kiss falls into that category. It just has to be experienced in order to know. Yes I said it Liam was my first kiss. " _Wow Lavina I …_

Oh god did I just muck that all up? Why did I do that? Liam rubbed my arms before pulling me back into another kiss. Heaven! Pure heaven. Unfortunately we had to break apart when we came up to the flat. I had no idea what we were looking for but we split up going into different rooms. For hours we searched and sneaked in kisses in between but nothing seemed to be happening. Liam's lips are so smooth his breath brought back memories of cranberries picked on granny's farm. I love the taste of a ripe picked Cranberry. My eyes were so heavy as morning approached paper after meaningless paper blurred together. I tried to stay awake but my body gave out as I felt Liam's arms wrap around me.

Waking up I yawned stretching out pushing over papers that had fallen on me " _Wait Lavina what's that?"_ Liampicked up one of the papers which looked like a birth certificate _._ " _It's the royal crest but why is it on this certificate?" "_ _I don't know who's is it?"_ Liam read the information.

Name and Surname: Daniel Henstridge 27th of August 1995 I gasped looking at him Liam's mouth dropped open. " _Does this ring a bell?"_ He looked pale shaking now quickly I put my arms around him trying to warm him up. " _Yea he's my baby brother he died when he was two we were playing down by the river me, him and Len and Leni slipped fell into the river he tried to save her but he fell to I could only save one of them I tried to save both but I was only two myself I...I saved Leni I thought he died"_

" _Liam that's awful!" It still doesn't answer why it's here in Damian's house" "What else is here?"_ We started pulling out papers from a hidden safe. Checks for 134.25 GBP every month signed by Lucius Bicknell. What did it all mean? " _There's one person who would know lets go"_

The look on the king's face when Liam and I presented him with this evidence was heartbreaking. " _There's only one person who would know Liam your mum"_

" _Mum?"_

" _Yes why would she know anything?"_

" _Sit down son there's something you should know Lavina you to Liam may need support"_

" _Why dad? What's going on? Why are you and Mum fighting so much?"_

" _Because of Daniel"_

" _I'm sorry dad I know you miss him I'm sure mum does to she's just not good at showing emotion"_

" _That's what I need to talk to you about Liam your mum isn't Daniel's mum"_

" _What are you talking about dad?"_

" _What I am saying is when your mum was pregnant with you and Leni we were having problems and I cheated on her with a friend from my childhood Sarah your mum was always jealous of her she even tried to choke her once it was a one time thing. I regretted it as soon as it happened but Helena never let me forget it she wouldn't leave her alone she harassed her, sent her threating letters to leave the country or else"_

 _After Sarah had Daniel I thought she'd be safer if she left the country there's no telling what your mum would of done to her she didn't want to leave Daniel but Helena promised to leave her alone if she left him with us we would raise him as your triplet" I thought Helena had accepted him she was always sweet to him took care of him like she did you Leni and Robert she held him when he cried stayed with him while he was sick, she helped him learn to talk he called her mummy" "I guess I was wrong"_

" _You think Mum had something to do with this?"_

" _I do son from now on be-careful things are about to get a lot more dangerous"_


	53. Chapter 53

**Damian**

What time was it? What day? They all blurred together the creak of the door made me jump as I looked up to see one of the guys come in. " _Lets go son it's time" "Time for what?" "Shut your mouth kid and move"_ He grabbed me roughly pulling me up handcuffing my wrists behind my back blind folding me gagging me. Shoving me roughly down the hall my heart was pounding what was happening? Where was he taking me? Why? I stumbled as he pushed me down the hall I felt the wind hit me but it wasn't cold what month was it? In fact the sun was hitting me I fell as he shoved me roughly my chin hitting something wooden hard.

" _Is thee camera ready?" "It is strap him down"_ What? Strap me why? I tried fighting them but felt the hard cold metal of the gun hit the back of my head. " _Don't knock him out he needs to be awake so the queen can hear his screams when he is beheaded"_ **Beheaded! What?**

Pain hit me so hard I gagged as everything started to become dizzy air rushed to my mouth as he grabbed my neck slamming my head on to a brick. " _Stop squirming kid I promise it'll be fast you'll only feel it for a second"_ I felt the wind of the ax pass me by god this was really happening why? I'm so confused what did I ever do to the queen? Len broke my heart it wasn't like I cheated on her. Was she just cleaning up her mess? How deranged was this family? Would I go to heaven? What would heaven be like? Gunfire rung out the me screamed what was going on? Shit was I going to be shot? What would be less painful? Hands grabbed me now where was I going? Who had me? Why was this happening? I just needed answers. I felt myself falling but I fell against something soft what was going on? I was in a car I felt it moving but where?

Suddenly the blindfold was ripped off. Lavina! She quickly took off the muzzle " _Thank god Damian! Oh my god I have been freaking out for months!_ Months? Was I missing that long? She threw her arms around me. I couldn't seem to stop shaking but someone handed me a drink and a few pills, looking up I saw King Simon.

" _Their aspirin_ _son take them it'll help I'm sure you have a killer headache"_

I had so many questions but I was speechless Lavina wrapped a blanket around me.

" _Damian are you okay?"_

 _What's wrong why can't you speak?"_

" _Sweetheart why don't we give him some space he's been through a rough ordeal I am sure you have questions_ _but right now we need to get out of England fast the plane is fueled up"_

" _Where are we heading dad?"_

Liam's voice carried I turned to see him sitting there looking as pale as I probably was. " _La Sarah is there Damian will be safe there and while were there we will contact my friend Deanna she's a private investigator she'll help us find your sister"_ Len? Where was Len? Why did they need to find her? So many questions my head was all cloudy my head was pounding. Closing my eyes as soon as we got on the plane I drifted off.


	54. Chapter 54

**Eleanor**

 **Envy**

 **Days, weeks, months all blurred together I had been sick for I don't know how long but I was sick of being sick. All I did was vomit horribly, I was running a bad fever which I couldn't shake. I know Lexi was freaking out ever since I passed out what was it three months ago? Four? I don't know anymore I just know I've been dizzy vomiting coughing sneezing forever but everyday I picked myself up went out trying to find legit work, but who was going to give a job to a homeless sick teen who probably looked and smelled like death? So it left me with little choice but to work the streets.**

 **I sold to anyone who wanted to buy I no longer gave it a second thought no matter how young they were. Lexi and I pretended we were Xena and Gabrielle and that everyday was a new adventure that we had to fight to get through, someday we would find our rainbow. Kit was more depressed everyday so I worked overtime to try to make him happy I know he hated Brett working the streets as much as I hated Lexi doing what she did. Hers might be more high end but it was still dangerous she came home beaten bloody bruised she was raped there were nights I held her cleaning off her blood with used dirty rags. I found in the dumpster while she cried. I was so afraid, each night we drugged ourselves just to so we could stay awake because sleeping wasn't an option you couldn't trust anyone.**

 **No one gave a damn about us they thought we were scum that we had no feelings, they would take and take till there was nothing left to take. We slept in different places each night under overpasses, abandoned buildings, alleys. I tried to stay strong so Lexi wouldn't worry but each day I just felt sicker and sicker. The rats freaked me out there were bugs spiders.**

 **Kit and I were thinking about going back to school but it's hopeless how can we enroll? We can't use our real names, even if it's not in the media I am sure we were reported as runways they'd find us drag us back home. We can't go there we can't be separated from Lexi and Brett. Today we walked around downtown La it's beautiful outside I saw a sign that was flashing the day and time. I can't believe it's June 11th seriously! While we were walking we saw some heartbreaking news. I am so pissed but more worried about Kit he is so upset. They voted today in England on the referendum for gay marriage. They showed the members of Parliament Kit's parents voted no for gay marriage can you believe it they voted against their own son to have the same rights as straight people! I don't want to leave Kit alone even though I know I should go to the clinic Lexi left me some money. I can barely breathe I need a doctor but he's so upset. I better go check on him.**

 **Envy**

 **Shocked, depressed I have no idea where I am but I know it's a hospital somewhere. Kit's dead! He killed himself! I can't stop crying it's coming back in shattered fragments, feeling sick throwing up pulling myself up to go check on him. I could barely walk my legs felt weak everything was blurry. Visions of him laying there with the needle in his arm the tie wrapped around his neck. It's making me crazy I guess I freaked out they drugged me again told me it would calm me down.**

 **I don't know where Lexi is why isn't she here? Where is here anyway? Kit's not the only one depressed.**

 **Envy**

 **I've been moved to a place called** **Covenant** **House they help homeless youth. I'm still pretty sick** **but the doctors say I am healing. Apparently I had pneumonia along with the stomach virus dehydration, malnutrition, Rotavirus, Meningitis.** **I was in the hospital for almost a month. Been laying here for two days still feel too weak to move, the staff is very nice trying to get me to move but I am just beyond it. I wish they had let me die what's the point in living?**

" _Leni!" "Oh my god thank god!"_ **I'm dreaming right I have to be there's no way my dad is standing here in front of me with Liam, Damian, Lavina. He's crying my dad the King never cries. It's not really his arms wrapped around me right now holding me is it? It can't be he hates me he'd really hate me if he knew what I have been doing. I must look like a total scumbag.**

 **Envy if this is a dream I hope I never wake up.**

 **Envy**

 **I'm home! I can't believe I am saying this but it's true we landed two hours ago. I'm lying in my bed dizzy but covered in warmth. Rachel is babysitting me but I don't care. I have so many mixed emotions but hearing dad say the words. "** _Your my daughter Len I will always love you I don't care who you love I just want you happy"_ **I still can't believe it but even Rachel is confirming it.**

" _You know your mum isn't a bad guy she's been beating herself up for months since you left I've seen her crying when she thinks no one is around she loves you Eleanor she's just not good at showing it. These past few months have given her a lot to think about she's had to get use to the idea that your growing up it's not easy for any parent never mind the queen of England."_

" _Keep that in mind when you speak to her she's asking to see you"_ **Rachel helped me up walking was painful I was still so dizzy but I was excited in a way scared did she really change? I hope so I needed her so bad living on my own it gave me a new prospective even if she's not the greatest mum she's still my mum. When we got to the parlor I saw Lexi there with her parents. What was going on? "** _Eleanor!"_ Mum's voice went up a few octaves I saw her face change from business to relief. " _Leni"_ I turned to see Lexi crying. Why was she crying?

" _I'm sorry for everything it was stupid of me to think we could make it out there were too young you belong here at home with your family that loves you"_

I saw her dad holding an envelope full of cash my throat tightened. Her mum bowed to mine

" _Lexi sweetie say goodbye we need to be going my queen my pardons again and thank you this money will surely help us buy a wonderful new life in a new city" "I am sure it will just see to it that Lexi here sticks to the agreement"_

 **I didn't need to hear it she didn't say it her eyes caste down she hurried out with her parents. My heart sank as I felt my stomach rise and knees give out. So I meant that little to her. Mums arms embraced me as I heard her whisper.**

" _Love is when the other person's happiness is more important than your own. Lexi gets it you belong here with your family Leni maybe someday when your older you'll find someone who is worthy of your love, I don't care who they are boy, girl as long as you are safe you'll never be safe living on the streets" "Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. Find that courage Leni use your strength I know you have in you make a fresh start nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anybody can start today and make a new ending"_ A deep voice called out from behind me

" _Don't ask what the world needs, ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who come alive" "Robert!" "Yea it's me Len now come here give your bro a hug"_ __ **Robert was using a cane but oh Envy it felt amazing to see him! To hug him to receive his kisses.**

 **I know now what I must do I must go to rehab I will clean myself up Envy I will return to school. I will study hard make everyone including, mostly myself proud. I swear I won't touch drugs ever again! Even though it hurts Envy I miss Lexi like crazy I miss Damian but he's happy he's safe him and Lavina both their living in La with Sarah he's doing well. Mum must never know shh it's our secret Envy.** **I'm kind of grossed out knowing I kissed my half brother but after everything I have done at least I can safely say I didn't know he was my brother at the time so that makes it less gross.** **I will dedicate my life starting today to helping kids who are bullied who are kicked out of their homes for being themselves. I have power I just need to use it the right way. No more drinking no more drugs it will be hard but I'll do it for Kit for Unity for all the kids who took their lives who's lives were taken from them. No one deserves to live in fear. I'm going to the school board I will resent my case and I won't take no for an answer.**

 **T** **oday seem** **s** **s** **o** **cloudy and** **Grey** **  
** **So** **full of sorrow and tomorrow seem** **s** **so far away  
But it gets better it gets better  
But it gets better it gets better  
And I know the world keeps throwing your strife  
But keep on strutting down this yellow brick road called life  
'Cause it gets better it gets better  
'Cause it gets better it gets better **

**Today doesn't seem so cloudy so Grey and my sorrow it will get easier cause it does get better and I am so glad I am alive to see it. I want every kid to have that chance.**

 **Wish me luck Envy here goes the rest of my life it's a mystery but it should be a pretty awesome one. Just like a unicorn I am unique and I am free. Remember me and watch me fly.**

 **I** **t gets better lyrics belong to Todrick hall check him out on youtube and mtv,** **twitter, instagram and facebook.** **I'm Mileycfan4eva on twitter thanks for reading reviews would be lovely.**


End file.
